Title: The Wasteland
Author: rav_chick452
Posted: 03-12-2005
Email:
Rating: NC17
Category: Dark
Content: C/A
Summary: read on and you will see
Spoilers: BtVs Season 2
Disclaimer: The characters in the Angelverse were created by Joss Whedon & David Greenwalt. No infringement is intended, no profit is made.
Distribution: Stranger-Things, anywhere but please tell me first
Notes: This is my first Fic, hope you like it. Vast lyrics
Feedback: Love it
Thanks/Dedication:Prologue
You’re made of my rib or baby
You're made of my sin
And I can't tell where
Your lust ends
And where your love begins
It began like an ocean flowing threw her body. It began like a storm on a hot night. It began like a nightmare. When she was I little girl she used to stay up all night hoping the monsters in her closet would leave her alone. She used to sit in her princess costume and pray her mommy and daddy would come in and sing her to sleep. They never came and the monsters in the closet always stayed there peering out at her, whispering to her. Never letting her free. Her nanny used to tell her stories of princess’ and princes, of beast and monsters. She would one day think back to those stories and use them to help her out of her hellhole of a life.
I guess I can say it started that night at the cemetery, but I would be lying. It truly started when a frightened young girl was left alone in the house, having to fight the monsters away herself. But we’re not going that far back. That night at the cemetery was just like any other. She and the others had gone patrolling. If it was a few years back she wouldn’t have done this. She wouldn’t have even thought of demons and vampires being real. But that was a few years ago, and this is now. The slayer had gotten sick with the flu, and had to stay home. It was only them, walking through the musky night searching for the undead.
Oh, they found it. They found him. And this is were the story begins…
Part 1: Pretty When You Cry
“Xander Harris, I can’t believe you drug me out here.” A cry came out of Cordelia’s lips. She stopped dead in her tracks and looked at him.
“Come on Cord, you know you like it. The starry night, the chill in the air, just like in the scary movies.” Xander replied looking at Cordelia with a hint of joy in his eyes.
“How romantic.” Cordelia replied with a hint of sarcasm in her voice.
“Can you guys be quiet so we can just get this done?” Willow looked from Cordelia to Xander. She was getting tired with there constant bickering.
“Sure Will, maybe we can go to Cordy’s house when we are finished. Get some food and watch PayPerView.” He looked back at Cordelia, smiling.
“Hell no, I’m going straight home and to bed.”
“Me, too.”
“Oh, come on girls. Let’s have some fun.” Xander grinned back at the girls.
Out from behind a gravestone appeared Angelus in tight leather pants and a red silk shirt. The gang of three stopped dead in there tracks. Cordelia and Willow held up crosses in front of them. Angelus smiled and runs straight pass Xander, who was standing in front of the two girls, and tackles Cordelia to the ground.
Letting his weight settle along her body, he held her tight to him, like she was a precious China Doll. His fingers gripped her hips, causing a tight scream escape her lips. “Don’t fight it, Lover, I will have you.” Angelus whispered into her ear. Just then he felt a sharp pain spread across his back.
Xander took the stake in his hand and stabbed it into Angelus’ back, barely missing the heart by an inch. Angelus sprung up and was about to launch at Xander when he heard a faint sound. “No.” Cordelia let escape her lips.
Angelus wiped his head back and stared at her. “Just for you, baby, I won’t.” With that he took off. Cordelia stood up with Willow’s help. “What did he mean by “Baby”?” Willow asked. Cordelia looked at her with fear in her eyes.
***
That’s the were it started. She didn’t know what was happening. First it was the cemetery and then there were red roses on her doorstep. After a week she received letters in the mail, drawings of herself, letters of poetry and of devotion. She knew where they came from, and it scared her. This was worse than the monsters in the closet, this was her reality. She now wished she was the scared little girl who thought monsters lived in her closet. She wished she can wear her princess costumes and sit in her room with the light on, but wishes never come true. She was in a wasteland that she couldn’t escape. She can not give in to her enter demons, but maybe she could give into a demon.
Part 2: Pretty When Your Mine
I didn't want to hurt you baby
I didn't want to hurt you
I didn't want to hurt you
But you're pretty when you cry
She sat up in her room combing out her hair, trying to get the undead vampire off her mind. Afraid to go out of the house, she stayed locked up in her room. Never leaving, never going out in to the halls or the kitchen. She had her food brought up to her and she had her own bathroom. It was a perfect place to hide. The letters he had sent over the past week where startling. The pictures were even worse. All she could think about was how could she be so weak? But that’s all she had ever been, weak.
Cordelia stood up from her vanity and walked over to her desk. She sat down in the chair and retrieved the letters from the bottom cabinet. She sat them on top of her desk and silently stared at them. She looked at them as though they were going to catch on fire. She reached for the first one and reread it. It was a poem, he had written it for her, about her. She put the letter down and picked up the last one. Written in it was a simple sentence: Your gonna scream for me.
She put the letter down and sat there looking at the wall. Why did he want her? Was this some sick way to get to the Slayer? She had all these questions going threw her head and not a single answer. She was getting frustrated and didn’t have a clue what to do.
Suddenly there was a knock on the door and Cordelia looked around. It wasn’t dinner time, so why would anyone come and bother her? “Come in.” Cordelia shouted, watching the door as it slowly opens. Cordelia jumped up and ran to the other side of the bed, far from the door.
Angelus stood in the threshold wearing tight black leather pants and a black silk shirt. “Hello, Lover.” He whispered across the room. He walked deeper into the room and closed the door behind him.
“How did you get in here?” Cordelia spoke from across the room, “No one invited you.”
“Oh, but you are wrong there. Your precious Nanny is such a tasty snack, and nice to. Ashamed she had to die.” Angelus tauntingly told her.
“No, no you didn’t! She would never let you in.” Cordelia replied denying the fact that was so true.
“But she did. Now, how about a kiss?” Angelus grinned over at her. He began walking slowly toward her, taking all the time in the world.
“Why are you here? Why are you after me? Why not Buffy?” Cordelia spat at him.
“Oh, Lover, because she is not you. You are perfect. You are just begging to be fucked.” Angelus stood in front of her with his hands on her hips. She tried to wrestle her self away from his grasp, but he just held on tighter. She scratched at his hands, trying to pry them loose. It had no affect on him. He just grinned at her. “I love a good fight.” He threw her onto the bed and straddled her hips.
She was crying, sobbing. She knew what was about to happen and it scared her. “That’s right, cry. Why you’re at it you can scream, also.” Angelus taunted her. He began pulling at her nightgown and ending up ripping it off of her.
“Please, no, don’t do this. Why? No please.” Cordelia let out a whimper. She knew begging wasn’t going to do nothing, but she had to try. Right?
“Come on Cordy, you know you like to play twisted little games. So, lets play.” Angelus looked down at the body under him and smiled. She wore no underwear of any kind. She was free to his eyes. He was so hot and throbbing. He needs to release himself. He undid his belt and unzipped his pants, letting himself out of the tight barrier. Smiling down at her, he pumped himself a few times and placed himself at her entrance. “Come on, scream for me.”
He drove inside of her until he was to the hilt. Cordelia let out a loud scream. The pain was unbearable; she moved her hips against his trying to make it hurt less. It became worse, like falling onto a thousand knives. Each stabbing her threw the abdomen.
Angelus smiled down at her and began thrusting faster and harder. Plunging into her tight wet passage. He felt the coming of an orgasm grace him. He watched her eyes become tearier from her cries and pleas. It only made him want to drive deeper. When she thought it was never going to end, he collapsed above her. Biting onto her neck, he began to drink. She slowly drifted off into a land of slumber.
And the moon gives me permission
And I enter through her eyes
She's losing her virginity and
All her will to compromise
I didn't want to hurt you baby
I didn't want to hurt you
I didn't want to hurt you
But you're pretty when you cry
I didn't want to fuck you baby
I didn't want to fuck you
I didn't want to fuck you
But you're pretty when you're mine
It was late and the rain hit the glass of the windows hard. She sat in a hospital bed, watching the small droplets fall onto the window. She had an IV hooked into her arm and oxygen over her nose. She didn’t know how she got here, but she did now that she won’t be staying. Cordelia tried to get up from her spot, but collapsing back down. She was in her wasteland; she wasn’t going to stay here for long. Goodbye to Sunnydale and goodbye to being weak, because all it causes is pain.
Part 3: Revelation
Ten Months Later….
It’s just as she remembers it. The books all the same, the table and chairs in the center. Given that she has only been gone a year, give or take. She expected change. Walking into the center of the library, she stood for a second and looked around.
“Cordelia?”
Cordelia turned around to Giles standing before her. Holding his glasses in one hand, and began cleaning them.
“Giles, oh my God, Giles!” Cordelia ran over and embraced him. Taking a step back, she gave him one of her million dollar smiles.
“Cordelia, the last thing we heard from you was you left Sunnydale. Why was that?” Giles asked her.
“Well, you know me. I moved to Los Angeles. Had to have the shoes,” She responded nervously. “So, where is everyone?”
Giles looked at her. She seemed like she had changed a little. No, a lot. More grown up, now what could cause a seventeen year old to do that? “Classes, but they should be out in about ten minutes. Would you like to wait?”
“No, sorry, I gotta go, but how about tonight? Is there a Scooby meeting?”
“Of, course.” Giles watched the young women walk out the door, wondering what tonight will bring.
***
8pm
Giles has been antsy the whole day. He didn’t know what to expect when Cordelia got here. The gang had told him that Cordelia just upped and left in the night. No note or letter or without telling anyone. He knew something was wrong there, but he never voiced his opinion.
Xander, Willow, and Oz sat around the square table. Buffy was pacing around the library, while Angel stood in the dark corner. Buffy was telling Giles about Hansel and Gretel. She couldn’t stop talking about how fairy tales where real.
“I cannot believe those kids where really Hansel and Gretel.” Buffy said.
“Yeah, I know it was freaky, we almost died.” Willow laughed nervously. She looked around at everyone. Xander was nodding and Oz was being his usual self, mellow.
“Hey, do you guys want to go to the Bronze?” Buffy asked everyone. She looked around as everyone nodded.
“I was thinking something a little different.” Everyone turned there head to the door. Cordelia stood there in a white sun dress. She was holding a Winnie the Pooh car seat carrier. She walked in further, giving everyone her original Cordelia Chase smile. “I’ll like you to meet Revelation.”
She came up to the center table and sat the carrier down. Inside was a giggling baby girl. Her pale skin was translucent and her eyes where bright hazel. She had little brown hairs pecking out of a green hat that was on her head. She was wearing a cute little green outfit. She began to giggle even more.
Cordelia looked around and saw the bewildered looks on everyone’s faces. Welcome back Cordelia thought to herself. Welcome back
Part 4: Welcome to the World, My Darling Girl
7 Months Earlier (May 1st, 1998)
Los Angeles, CA
I have to get over this. I have to move on, but how can I? I have a constant reminder everyday of my life. I left Sunnydale because I was scared, I was terrified, but that is not who I am. I am fucking Cordelia Chase. I strike fear into hearts everywhere. I am Queen C. I am not going to have one traumatic event ruin my life. I don’t know what I am doing.
I had to get money out of my account to just rent a one room apartment. At least it is in china town, the good part of LA. It is just above a small flower shop. I got all the painting done and got most of the furniture moved in. In the far corner, I got the nursery finished. I put a curtain up around the area. I decided to do the “room” in Old Winnie the Pooh pattern. I painted the whole apartment light green, so it goes with the nursery. I bought a circular crib to go in the center of the “room” with a Tigger confuter. I got a rocking chair for the fair corner and a dresser at the back wall. I know I am having a girl. I guess since I was a little girl I have always knew my first child would be a girl. My sweet darling girl.
In my bedroom area, I have my bed suspended from the ceiling by boat rope. I have a neon green confuter lying across it. I have light blue drapes hang across my windows. In my living room area I have a blue couch by the door. I have a book shelf by the window felled with books. Most of them had baby books and How to be A Mommy books.
Everything is simple and nice. I love it here because it is peaceful. When my girl gets here I will love her more than anything, I already love her. I will not let anything happen to her that has happen to me. I will protect her with my life. Starting with not telling her who her father is, she would be too disappointed.
December 31, 1998
11: 32 am
“Push” The doctors had my legs up in straddles and I had my hands on the sides of the bed. The pain is unbearable. It felt like I was pushing out a live human being from my loins (sarcastic).
“I can see the head, come on Cordelia you have just a little more to go.” The doctor was urging me on. I screamed loud and pushed. Another contraction going through my body, pushing as hard as I can, I felt it all end.
“You did great. She’s a girl, a wonderful baby girl.” The doctor announced, and placed her on my stomach. He continued missing with the placenta. I cradled her in my arms and wiped off some blood out of her face. Thinking to myself, “Welcome to the world, my darling girl.” I was crying. She is my baby, my daughter. When I lay my eyes on her my past is my past and she is my future.
The doctor stood up and took off his gloves. “You did good kid.”
The doctor walked and the nurse came trailing in. She was a big Latino woman, age written on her face. “I’m Pita, ma’am. I am going to take nińa, here, give her a bath, and weigh her.” She said to me and reached for her. At first I pulled away, but she reassured me it was going to be okay.
I don’t know how long it has been. I guess I fell asleep. I looked to the door as I expected someone to walk threw. Right then Pita pushed in my baby girl. She picked her up and carried her over to me. I took her from the large Latino woman and held her close. The women stood there watching me.
“So, what are you going to name her?”
I looked down at my yawning baby. She had the most beautiful hazel eyes and a lot of brownish black hair. Her skin was as white as day (must be her father’s side). I looked back up at the old women.
“Revelation. Revelation Magdalene Gwendolyn Fiona.”
***
Present
I looked around at everyone. Willow, Buffy, Xander and Oz. The Scooby’s. I turn around to Giles when a face catches my attention. “Angelus,” popped out of my mouth. Buffy can in front of me. “No, he’s Angel. Willow re-souled him… among others things. So, anyway, Cordelia how did this happen.”
I looked at her. The same old Buffy, a bitch. “Oh, you know Buffy, when a guy and a girl...” She looked at me with a piercing look. I laughed. Just then I heard a small cry. I turned around to see Revelation with tears streaming down her cheek. I bent down and picked her up. Holding her in my arms I looked around to everyone.
Buffy had her hands on her hips, “So, Cordelia, who’s the daddy?”
TBC