just fic


Title: Without You
Author: Helen
Posted: 12-16-2003
Email: helen_taft@msn.com
Rating: NC-17
Category:
Content: C/A
Summary:
Spoilers:
Disclaimer: The characters in the Angelverse were created by Joss Whedon & David Greenwalt. No infringement is intended, no profit is made.
Distribution:
Notes: This is for Scorchy and thanks for such a lovely challenge Hun. Here’s the details for ya: Demons have totally taken over Sunnydale, there's no Slayer or Watcher and there's only Cordy and Willow of the main SG around. The humans that are left alive are hiding out in caves, tunnels and whatnot.
Angel still has his soul but he's very Beigy as in dominent, overbearing, growly and snarly. He's with Spike at the mansion in Sunnydale and though he has a soul, he's not really all that bothered about the state of things!
One night when it's Cordy's turn to go get food for her and Willow, she runs into Angel and Spike who force her to take them to hers and Willow's little hideout. The vampires take both girls as slaves and things happen!!!
In my version I planned to have Angelus not Angel but to be honest, this would be more fun if it was Beige Angel!
Scenes to include if you choose to take this...
1) On a particularly rioty night, Cordy gets scared (bless her) and climbs into bed with Angel (sweet!).
2) Angel getting her to do proper slave things like wash his clothes, run his bath etc etc!
Whatever you do with Spike and Willow is entirely up to you, pair em up if ya like!
Feedback: Yeah feed me!
Thanks/Dedication:


Part 2

MANSION

“Now I remember you”. The wondering whisper said in the deep masculine voice was too low to disturb the woman on the bed.

Angel stood looking down at her as she slept peacefully and deeply now that the worst effects of the demons venom had passed. Not that they’d realised there’d been venom until they’d gotten her here. Luckily for her it wasn’t of the deadly variety.

He searched her pale features for signs of the girl he remembered from nearly half a year ago. The girl who’d haunted his dreams for endless weeks. He thought back to the time when for days on end after their chance meeting he’d tossed and turned on his bed, twisting the sheets with restless yearning. Was it pure coincidence that they’d stopped haunting him on the same day that the master emerged from his cell and erected a new mini world order over the ashes and bones of the old one- maybe?

“And now I know what happened to you”. She slept on her breathing even with his sheets tucked up to her chin, so only her heart-shaped face showed above the navy cotton.

Angel continued to stand by the bed silent and still while the memories washed over him. He’d gone out one night and succumbing to a rare impulsiveness had entered the noisy crowded club, watching the dancing humans and wondering to himself what the hell he was doing there. He’d been about to leave when she’d appeared suddenly in front of him; full of brazen confidence and determination. To his jaded eyes she’d looked so young and her careless almost childish trust had disarmed him instantly. Then she’d turned her charm on him.

He’d been transfixed and strangely dumbstruck; unable to think of a single thing to say that wouldn’t send her into hysterics or reveal just how much she tempted him to give him to the monstrous hunger gripping him. Uncomfortable with the strength of his instant response he’d left as soon as he could, escaping really and hiding his achingly hard reaction.

He been determined never to go back but despite his best efforts to forget her; she’d stayed with him for a long time afterwards even if only in the dreams. He hadn’t wanted to want her then and he still didn’t.

So it hadn’t been precognition after all that had frozen him in his tracks today but recognition. Despite the changes that the battle to survive had wrought a part of him had recognised her. He silently catalogued the differences, filing them away in his mind. The most obvious ones being that now her once glossy dark hair was matted and she was filthy all over from living like an animal for months on end.

But the worst of it was how thin she’d become; so much so that the small bones of her hands were visible and the soft round cheeks he remembered had been honed down to taut slants stretched taut over high cheekbones. She was frail really, but he was only seeing that now that she was lying so still. When she was awake all he saw was her temper and heard only that sharp tongue and smart mouth.

He sat back down in the chair and his eyes wandered restlessly around the darkened room. Not that there was much to look at since he hated clutter of any kind. Unable to distract himself his eyes were drawn back to her and he stiffened imperceptibly when he saw she was awake and looking back at him with wariness in every line of her body.

“What were you thinking just then”? She demanded suspiciously, her hazel eyes wide with fear and yet curious too.

“That you’re too thin” he replied simply deciding not to complicate things with admitting to having met her before. He smiled wryly when an indignant look immediately crossed her face. She hadn’t liked that- typical woman, even after what she’d been through she could still feel feminine pride.

“Gee thanks you’re so good for my ego ya know” pure sarcasm dripped from her facetious words. Then she frowned thoughtfully, Okay so what if he thought she was too thin; that was a good thing considering he was a vampire and all- wasn’t it. No that bit of logic didn’t help- it still rankled.

“Sorry” he said unrepentant but with a half smile that softened his hard handsome face. Oh oh thought Cordelia and dragged her eyes away from those sensually curved lips. Hello- vampire walking corpse, blood sucking parasite- remember!.

“I bet- so what’s your deal then, I mean have you been defanged or something”? She made her voice hard, refusing to lower her guard just because he was as handsome as sin and anyway it was a valid question to her mind. Especially since she was still alive and too thin or not she’d have expected him to at least take a nibble if he could.

He said nothing for a moment but just returned her look with a blank one of his own. Cordelia could feel a blush start and wondered if she’d hurt his feelings with her blunt question. She was about to voice a low apology for sticking her nose in when he stood up and walked silently to the door.

“Get some more sleep” he commanded without turning around and shut the door behind him. Leaving Cordelia with her mouth open in gaping shock and disbelief when she heard the key turn in the lock.

SPIKE

“Spike, we need to talk”. Angel announced as he walked back into the living area. The blonde vampire was lying sprawled on the couch in front of the massive unlit stone fireplace. A bottle of Jack D clutched in his hands.

He’d just taken a hefty swig when he’d heard Angel approach and now he took his time swallowing. “Spare me the effing details. I don’t wanna know” was the surly and ever so slightly slurred response.

“Are you drunk and .. why is it so dark in here”? With annoyance filling him Angel went over to one of the wall scones and checked the oil level before lighting it. Spike winced when the extra light hit his sensitive eyes.

“I’m drunk and your sick – so where even stevens. Hah what a pair of scary vamps we make eh- Angelus”. Spike tacked the last on deliberately knowing how much it needled the other vampire to be called by that name.

Angel paused and raised his eyes to the ceiling as aggravation clawed inside. He suppressed the instinctive urge to growl, knowing from experience not to respond to the deliberate taunt. So instead he crossed his arms over his wide chest and quirked a brow.

“Were keeping them” he said, deliberately setting a match to the fuse and prompting Spike into leaping up from the couch to pace the floor in agitation. Sighing heavily he waited for Spike to spew the bile that was obviously clogging in his throat.

“Forget sick you’re fucking crazy” The blonde exploded with a snarl. He increased the speed of his pacing as his temper grew hotter. “Jesus you and that sodding soul of yours – fuck me, a vampire in shiny white armour, do me a favour”.

“They can do stuff around here- should keep them busy and the place tidy. What’s the harm”? It was like talking to a ticking bomb, thought Angel in amusement but keeping his face expressionless, no sense in adding fuel to the fire.

“What stuff- the only thing their good for is eating, what is it with you? Look if you wanna ‘do’ her then just sodding well ‘do’ her. Then eat and dump her-simple”. Stormed Spike and raised his arms palms up in a gesture of frustration.

“I don’t want to ‘do’ her as you so charmingly put it- just keep her”. Angel lied easily and kept track of his agitated grandchilde all the while thinking he was damned if he was going to try and explain something that he didn’t understand himself. There was nothing Spike could say that he hadn’t already thought himself and in the end it had made no difference.

“Then you’re blind as well as stupid then. Okay I’ll do her might as well get some fun out of this”. Spike was forced to stop the pacing when he found his way blocked by a suddenly furious Angel.

“If you lay so much as a finger on her I’ll rip you’re tongue out and feed it to you”. The bloodthirsty threat was snarled only inches from Spikes face. They glared at one another with both of them refusing to break eye contact.

“Don’t make it more tempting now will you, Peaches”. Spike returned refusing to be intimidated by older and bigger vampire.

“I mean it, Spike. Do not test me on this”. Angel kept his tone low but anger still vibrated through each syllable. After another tense second or two Spike stepped backwards and then walked off with the bottle still hanging from one hand.

“I can see that, but your still missing the effing point aren’t you”. Narrowed dark eyes under lowered brows clashed with sneering blue ones across the distance from the fireplace where Spike was now leaning his back against the grey stone mantle.

“Do you think it matters what the bloody hell I think you arsehole. You can’t keep them- they won’t let you and there’s no chance you can keep it a secret for long”. Spike raised the bottle to take another long draught.

Despite not saying who they ‘they’ were Angel knew he wasn’t referring to the girls being obstructive. “You let me worry about them. I can deal with them”. Angel’s face went blank and he raised his chin defensively; knowing Spike was thinking the same things as him. Memories could be a bitch when they were shared.

“Yeah right cos it’s not like he hates your guts or anything now is it”?

Ignoring that for the moment Angel sat down heavily to stare into the empty grate. Stubborn determination warred with emotional exhaustion making him edgier. “Look, I’ve made up my mind so either get used to it or get out- it’s up to you”. He looked up to catch Spike, in a startlingly swift change of mood now grinning at him.

“Oh I’m staying mate, wouldn’t miss this for all the tea in china. Can’t you just see the headline in the Vampire Gazette, “Infamous Angelus- Once Scourge of Europe now a bleedin philanthropist’. Next thing is you’ll be telling us not to eat em”. Spike scoffed at the ridiculous thought.

It was Spike’s turn to ignore a black glower and his sunny mood returned. “So tell me Angel me old pal. How is good ole Granny these days. Still doing the dirty with the Master like they was bunnies”?

DARLA

“Hello Darla”.

“Angel what a surprise; well actually not- since I could smell that stinking soul of yours before you even entered the room. Thanks for stopping by now get the hell out”. Darla was lying and they both knew it. She’d gone tellingly stiff the moment he’d spoken from the doorway and it had taken a few seconds for her to collect her wits.

She walked around the battered old desk to sit facing him with her hands folded carefully on the scarred wooden top. Pieces of paper and reams of lists were scattered in an organised heap next to her right arm as she looked up at his face with a chilling smile fixed firmly in place.

“Not until I’ve said what I came to say”. He replied calmly and pushing himself away from the doorframe where he’d been leaning, walked confidently inside; shutting the door carefully behind him. Her response to his visit was exactly what he’d expected. Warm reunions between the two of them where firmly in the past, where they belonged.

“Then get on with it and then leave before you’re found here”. She snapped coldly.

She wanted him gone and yet at the same time she drank in the sight of him. Her eyes travelled with hungry appreciation over his tall muscular body and stopped short with an arrested expression when she was the flicker of something hot and calculating in his dark, dark eyes. God she hated him with every fibre of her being. The only problem was she still wanted him with every bit as much fire too.

“Worried about me Darla, I’m touched”. He smirked when her face chilled at the deliberately provocative question.

He knew her well- too well; including how to push and prod her into doing something that he wanted. Centuries of shared murder and mayhem made sure they had few secrets from one another. Although his soul ensured she could hardly understand him anymore. That fact had hurt him deeply at first but right now it was a blessing.

“Don’t be, I’m only worried about my own skin- what do you want, Angel- I’m busy here”.

To anyone else it might seem strange to hear such a sweet husky voice turn so cold and hard. But Angel knew it was a much better indicator of her personality that the seductive purr she used like a silken tool to wrap men around her finger.

She watched him saunter towards her, his loose hipped walk a reminder of just how well he could use that body of his to deliver either exquisite pleasure or excruciating pain. She been on the receiving end of both and loved every minute of it. She felt a shiver run down her spine as some of those images paraded through her minds eye.

“Yeah I heard about your big promotion, congratulations you are now officially even more of a slave to him- what happened to all the grand plans and ideals about being free to roam and maim as you please”? He quirked a brow as an added little gesture designed to raise her temper and play her right into his hands.

“I got a better offer” she spat at him, with her china blue eyes narrowed into furious slits. Then wising up a bit- she decided to turn it back on him. “What’s the matter baby are you jealous”?

“Of course who wouldn’t be- I always wanted to be short, squat and ugly as ten monkeys” he returned casually and hitching his hip on her desk opposite her clenched hands, swung a leg negligently back and forth.

Quick as lightning she pushed back her chair, stood up and reaching over slapped him hard across the face. Then gasped when he returned the favour with interest; shocked and aroused again at the stinging pain she held her hand to the reddened spot. Angel saw the hot flare in her eyes and let the air trickle into his nostrils to taste the arousal that filtered through. Good, his plan was working he thought as a strong sense of satisfaction filled him. An emotion he knew better than to show on his face.

“Don’t ever talk about him that way, he’s powerful, wicked and smart three things you couldn’t even aspire to be ‘soul boy’ – at least not anymore anyway”. It was a less than subtle insult about the difference his soul had made to the vampire he was now, compared to Angelus.

“I get by” he told her with a slight smile- he was well aware how she viewed him. The insult was nothing, especially compared to some of the other times they’d rowed about that very thing.

“I just bet you do - So tell me what are you feeding off these days, is it rats again”? She sat back down and crossed her legs, letting the skirt hitch higher on her thighs to reveal the taut creamy skin above the knees.

“You feed the humans meat to keep them alive and breeding – I just finish off the liquid” he shrugged and eyed her carefully – bingo!

“Vampires are giving you animal blood”? Immediately that registered a thoughtful look entered her eyes; calculation was swift to follow.

“Don’t even think about, Darla – if you try and starve me. I’ll start with the farms you all care so much about and drain them dry”. Her eyes widened at the softly voiced threat- he couldn’t be that stupid could he?

“Don’t be more stupid than you have to be, Angel. If you do that you’ll be ripped apart- not a nice way to go”.

Just thinking about the damage he could do sent a spurt of panic shooting up from her belly which she did her best to tamp down. She was responsible for the productivity of the farms and the retention of living humans to harvest and help maintain the food supply. If he did what he threatened then anarchy would reign followed by starvation with no more humans to feed on and no way to escape the hellmouth.

“Exactly and in that case you may as well have killed me when you had the chance”. Not that she hadn’t tried of course he could see in her eyes that she was thinking of the same incident. The time when she’d held a knife to his throat, ready to slice his head off once and for all.

“Poor baby – still sore about China”? A hard smile curved her lips and her eyes glittered like shard of ice in her pale face.

“I don’t know. Are you”? He said it slowly meeting her eyes squarely.

He’d come back sure and begged her to take him back soul and all- he couldn’t deny that. But in the end he hadn’t been able to be the vampire she wanted him to be. He’d left defying her and with her scream of rage echoing in his ears above the sound of the crying child he’d taken with him.

“Why should I, you came crawling back to me remember. Look as fascinating as this is…”

“I need your help”. It was crunch time, lets see if I remember you as well as I think I do.

You need my help- well this is rich. You don’t come to see me. You don’t come to me when I send for you to and now you want MY help”? She was beyond incredulous, did he really think that she would do anything for him was he truly that vain after all he’d done- leaving her alone to search the world for him and a cure for that goddamn soul that had ruined her unlife for the last century and a half.

He carried on like she hadn’t spoken and getting off the desk paced the length of the room while ticking of the items he wanted. “I need some livestock, chickens, pigs that kind of thing. I’d get some myself but you guys have the monopoly”.

Darla snarled and started to say something but then stopped confused, shaking her head as if to clear it she looked at him suspiciously. “We need them to feed the humans, its called maintaining the food supply you fool. Why do you need live animals I thought you got your supply after their dead”

“I do but I want it fresher- I must be getting old or something”. He replied flippantly and then smiled as if daring her to contradict him. He just knew her mind was working overtime trying to figure out the angles and ferret out what he was up to.

“Too bad- try it straight from the vein and then we’ll talk”. She fired right back at him while her mind worked furiously.

“C’mon Darla” he drawled and sauntered closer, round the desk and over to stand beside the chair with his hips at her shoulder. He leaned down and placed a hand on the arm of it- next to her elbow. “There must be someway I can convince you to do me this one small favour”.

“Drop the seduction routine it doesn’t work on me”. She said contemptuously and then gave herself away when she shot up and away to the other side of the desk. Trying to gain back the illusion of indifference she stalked towards the door; determined to open it and shout for someone to remove him.

He got there before her and slammed a hand on the stained wooden panel. “Why not I used to know how to please you- don’t you want to be pleased”?

His scent enveloped her and drove her mad with the soul underlying her beloved demon, she went to push him away with all of her vampiric strength but he used his perfect timing to advantage and kissed the spot on her neck that could always make her melt, it wasn’t enough; her hand tightened to push him- then he bit her hard.

She moaned low in her throat and whimpered at the effort it took to force out even a breathy whisper “Stop it. Now”.

“You don’t really want me to stop, but since you ask me so nicely” he went to open the door. Her hand caught his on the handle.

“I’ll get you what you asked for”. He hid his smile and the flare of victory that tried to light his dark eyes.

SPIKE

“You did what? Have you gone totally off your trolley you big bloody stupid effing wanker”? Spike was back to pacing and liking this topic even less than the previous one. He’d stared in utter disbelief when Angel had walked in and told him where he’d been, who with and what got said.

“Calm down I know what I’m doing, I know Darla remember” Angel shucked of his coat and walked through to check that his bedroom was still locked. The handle turned but the door didn’t budge- relieved he began to relax.

Not so Spike.

“Yeah so do I mate and no need for reminders thanks, you two maruaded your way across half of Europe before I was even sired and still managed to nearly give me grey hairs – Jesus she’s only a little less poisonous than that psycho she lives with”.

He barely took a breath-

“Ya know what I wanna know. How the hell we are related- and if we really are- does insanity run in the family or something”. He snarled with a sneer at his ‘relative’.

“You’re asking me that with Dru for a sire”? Angel crossed his arms and raised both brows to emphasise his point and demand a reply when he didn’t get one from the immediately stumped blonde.

“OK smartarse good point – in fact that is the point. Shit I’m doomed”. Spike relented and then groaned long and loud. He fell back onto the couch and slumped down with his boots in front of him- a perfect target for his morose look of despair as he wondered when the same affliction would hit him.

“Look Spike, I need things to get settled that’s all. Trust me I know what buttons to push with Darla so I pushed them”. It was clearly an ‘end of conversation tone’ which was totally wasted on Spike who quickly piped up again.

“On your head be it Mate, but don’t say I didn’t warn you– you may have to give them up is all I’m saying”.

Angel said nothing to that; he didn’t have to, one look at his expression had Spike sighing heavily and searching for a topic to get his mind off his woes. He grinned evilly when he hit on one.

“So did you…” he whistled and then winked “bang ‘er then”?

“What- what did I say” he laughed out when with a snarl Angel advanced on him. He held up his hands still smirking and found himself hanging by his coat from the clenched hands of his grandsire, his boots dangling a good two foot above the smooth stone floor. “I was only askin’- can’t a bloke ask a question”?

A LITTLE LATER

Angel started to get worried when the room beyond the locked door remained quiet and still. Was she all right- maybe he should have let the redhead stay with her? He hated second guessing himself and finally decided to check it out.

As silently as he could with the old lock he turned it and then pushed open the door. He felt the breeze before he saw the empty bed. He was going to kill Spike..

“Spike” he roared and ran towards the window. Broken glass tinkled under his feet when he approached it. Spike appeared at the doorway and gaped as he looked between the enraged moonlight covered vampire and the empty bed. Oh shite!

“Canny little wench ain’t she”? He offered after a taut silence as Angel glared at him accusingly.

“Where is the other one”? Angel bit out between clenched teeth.

Continue on...