Title: The Broken Pieces
Author: Daisy
Posted: 02-04-2003
Rating: NC17
Email: e.large@talk21.com
Content: Angst. (Romance/Friendship in later parts I promise)
Summary:
Spoilers: During Some Assembly Required BTVS2 then AU
Disclaimer: The characters in the Angelverse were created by Joss Whedon & David Greenwalt. No infringement is intended, no profit is made.
Distribution: You want it, you got it. But be a peach and let me know.
Notes: This is my first attempt at C/A in the BTVS years (eep! as Willow would say). Answer to Jenilyn's C/A BTVS challenge.A caustic comment from Cordelia intrigues a confused Angel, causing him to follow her home. What he finds is not what he expects.
Full challenge at: http://www.stranger-things.net/foru...=&threadid=5848
Notes for Part 4: Um...AU....playing with the time line....yadda yadda yadda.....I've written Angel completely out of character.....blah blah blah....all I want to do is write the smut...grumble grumble grumble.... I need therapy....Yep, that about covers it. Feedback: Bring it on....
Dedication: To my fellow LotR whores who I have repeatedly frightened with my questionable taste in men.
Part 1
Cordelia:Why are these terrible things always happening to me?
Xander:(cough)Karma(cough)
Some Assembly Required.
***
Angel cursed to himself at the look of annoyance shadowing the beautiful young slayer's face as he let himself be dragged out of the Sunnydale High School library by Cordelia Chase. Buffy had lied to him and yet some how he was the one feeling guilty. Angel felt too old, too dead and too angry to turn around and hash it out with the petite blonde girl, it was almost a relief have Cordelia volunteer him to escort her home. He'd had more than enough of that Harris boy for a start, it took all of the vampire's restraint not to rip the kids limbs from his body every time Angel saw him after that dance.
"I just love getting a rise out of Buffy." Cordelia's vacant tone broke through Angel's thoughts, he had been aware that the girl had been talking but he'd just tuned it out as they walked. Yet there was something in the way she said that sentence that brought him to a halt. He knew what Buffy and her friends thought of Cordelia, spoilt rich bitch was what they'd called her one time. Angel had stayed out of the conversation, he was the last person who should be casting judgment on another. There was a weariness in her voice that pulled at something deep inside of him that he had only felt once before, the night he'd watched Buffy Summers wash away the dust of her first vampire slay. Looking at the young woman beside him Angel was surprised to see how tired she appeared to be, it was true that he hadn't spent a huge amount of time with Cordelia but whenever they had been in the same room she had always seemed to be so carefree and vibrant, a caustic tongue with an untouchable presence.
"Are you...Are you OK?"
"What?" Cordelia blinked at him, surprised by his voice even though he was next to her.
"Are you OK Cordelia?" Angel asked her again, his shoulders hunched, hands in his pockets. The words sounded foreign in his mouth and even more alien out in the open.
"Oh, after the whole hiding in a dumpster surrounded by Frankensteins off cuts drama? Well, yeah, I'm just peachy fine." She rolled her eyes at the tall vampire, he watched as her demeanor shifted, back was the Sunnydale High head cheerleader in the blink of an eye. "I swear, those freaks are gonna be the death of me. You might want to tell your girlfriend that sucking people into the weirdness that is her life is not the way to make friends and influence people." Cordelia fumbled around in her purse for her car keys, Angel noticed her hands were trembling ever so slightly, contradicting the carefree way she spoke.
"What's..."
"As much fun as this hasn't been I'm going home to have a bath for about three days. Don't worry about taking me home, I'll be fine. I'm sure there's some sort of vampire/slayer drama you're late for anyway, wouldn't want to upset the little woman now would you?" Cordelia flicked her fingers through her bangs distractedly. "Oh, and Angel? Cream? Not a good colour on you." She waved her hand in disdain at his jacket.
"I..." Angel blinked dumbly at her, confused by her sudden changes of topic.
"Goodnight." Cordelia ignored whatever he was about to say and turned around, striding confidently towards the door to the car park.
"But..." His words died on his tongue as the heavy doors closed shut behind her as she walked out into the night. Angel heard the hum of an engine starting then the rumble of tires over tarmac. He glanced back in the direction of the library, he should go back and talk to Buffy, resume the conversation they'd hadn't been able to finish the night before when they'd found the open grave, find out why she'd lied to him this evening about where she was, help them search for the ghoul who was chopping up beautiful young girls.
Angel knew he should go back to the library.
His brain told him to but his feet weren't listening as he followed the brunettes invisible footsteps out of the school.
***
Cordelia Chase stared unseeing into the murky mirror in front of her, her thoughts a million miles away from the grimy hotel room she sat in as she dragged a brush through her long wet hair. Long tired strokes that she had once labored over so very carefully, every strand in place, styled to perfection.
Perfection.
Queen C couldn't be seen with anything less. A bitter humorless laugh slipped from her lips disturbing the unbearable silence, it echoed around the room, her own voice mocking her. She clasped a hand over her mouth, the other suspended in mid air, her knuckles white where she was holding her brush too tightly.
"Oh god, I'm losing my mind." Cordelia shook her head in annoyance at herself. "Get a grip Chase." She muttered and tossed the hairbrush on to the bed behind her. The sheets were unmade, the thought of spending yet another night beneath the scratchy over-starched off-white cotton made her skin itch with disgust. The flicker of a silent TV danced across her naked shoulders, the acrid smell of hopelessness and desperation borne of a thousand faceless nobodies that had once stood in the same spot as her hung heavily in the room.
She jumped when the unmistakable sound of a body hitting the wall in the room next to hers startled her. Holding her breath she waited for the shouting to begin, she didn't have to wait very long. The anguished pleas and furious accusations of the lovers next door had bled into her own personal hell the same time every night for a week. It was seeping into her skin along with the dirt and lies that saturated every part of the motel.
"I'm fine." Cordelia told her reflection with very little conviction, the same face she saw everyday stared back at her, nothing was different, eyes, nose, lips, chin, cheeks, eyebrows, all present and correct. The rasp of the worn towel wrapped around her told her in no uncertain terms that everything was different and would never be the same again.
"I'm Cordelia Chase and I'm fine." The young woman took a deep breath and squared her shoulders, summing up the ice queen inside. It wasn't working. She felt the burn of tears behind her eyes and in her throat. She'd promised herself she wouldn't spend another night crying in this place. Not another night. But it was too much. It took too much to spend all day pretending then come home and keep up the charade for herself.
Home.
The tears fell as that word imbedded itself inside her heart. Her shoulders shook with the force of her sobs as she sat down heavily on the bed that had seen too much pain and too much faceless sex over the years.
Home, family, security. It was all gone before she had even had the chance to ask why.
Why Daddy? Why did you let this happen to us?
Cordelia buried her face in her hands trying to muffle the unbearable sound of her own despair.
***
From the shadows across the street a lone figure stood watching the beautiful young woman cry alone in the dank motel room. He could taste her pain, smell her fear, feel her desperation. It was as tangible as the earth under his boots, as though if he reached out he could run his fingers through it, as thick as molasses, staining his pale skin.
Cordelia Chase was crying and Angel had never witnessed anything so sad.
Part 2
Angel sat alone in his apartment waiting for the sun to set and release him from his prison, the heart breaking sight of Cordelia Chase crying in the rundown Sunnydale Motel playing over and over again in behind his eyelids. She had looked so small, so scared. So very different from the confident young woman that had flirted with him and spat scorn at his girlfriend and her scoobies. He had watched Cordelia from his shadow for two hours, watched as her sobs halted as quickly as they had started, stood enthralled as she spoke to herself words that the vampire couldn't hear even with his enhanced senses. Every emotion she felt declared itself on her face, anger, fear, frustration screamed at him with the snarl of her mouth and the flash of her eyes. Vitriol that had so often been saved for others was turned on her reflection as Angel watched Cordelia berate herself for something the vampire knew not. He saw a stillness descend over the young woman as her shoulders slumped and her chin dropped in defeat, whatever argument she was having with herself she had lost.
That was the image Angel couldn't erase from his memory, Cordelia Chase accepting her own defeat. He'd watched her misery and it had burnt into his soul.
***
The fake smile plastered on Cordelia's face was beginning to give her a headache. Or maybe it was Harmony's never ending high pitched babble assaulting her ears that was the cause. Either way the dull ache pulsating behind her eyes had the makings of a migraine if she didn't get away from her friends very soon. She squeezed her eyes shut and rubbed her temples. Maybe when she opened her eyes everything would be better. Maybe she wouldn't be in the middle of a too crowded cafeteria. Maybe, just maybe, when she opened her eyes she'd be lying on some sun kissed beach with out a soul around for miles.
She wasn't.
Cordelia prodded the food on her tray, she was hungry but no power on this earth could force her to eat the slop they'd served up today. Her stomach growled in decent.
"So Cor, are we mall bound after practise?" Harmony beamed at her, Cordelia felt several pairs of perfectly mascaraed eyes looked at her for approval. Can't they think for themselves just once, she thought to herself.
"I can't tonight, I have other plans." Cordelia said, absently flicking her long hair over her shoulder.
"Hot date?" Aura piped up from behind Harmony.
"Of course." She lied to them, she couldn't very well tell them the truth, that she planned on staring at the wall of the motel room she was currently residing in.
"Who?" Harmony arched an eyebrow at her, as second in command of their group the blonde prided herself on knowing who was seeing who at Sunnydale High-school and she was well aware that for reasons they hadn't been able to deduce their leader Cordelia had been on a suspiciously lack of dates in the last few months. Add to that that Harmony was pretty sure Cordelia had worn the clothes she was wearing just last week. Harmony could smell a dethroning in the air, maybe she wouldn't just be Queen C's side kick for much longer. Queen H, it didn't have the same ring to it but the blonde liked the sound of it all the same.
Cordelia was saved from having to further lie to her friends when the awkward elbow of Xander Harris accidentally connected with her head as he hurried passed. A silence descended on the tables around them, waiting for Cordelia Chase to hand Xander his balls on a platter.
"Umm...sorry?" The young man winced ready for the scathing put down he knew would be headed his way.
"Just....watch where you're going Xander." Cordelia muttered and rubbed her hand over where his arm had connected with the back of her head. She knew everyone expected something a little more vitriolic but she was too tired to live up to her persona right now, another sleepless night was taking a toll on her reigning bitch status and she really couldn't bring herself to care. Cordelia realised that not only where her friends staring waiting for a cutting remark that would bring the boy to his knees but so was Xander himself and most of the inhabitants of the cafeteria. With an annoyed glare the congealing food in front of her Cordelia picked up her bag and stood up. Dozens of curious eyes watched her as she walked out of the cafeteria.
"Well....that was significantly less painful then usual. What's up with your commander in chief, didn't she have her extra strength bitch wheaties this morning?" Xander said to no one in particular, he took a step backwards when he noticed he was the sole attention of Cordelia's friends, the Queen C's in training. Xander gulped. He was severely outnumbered.
"Oh, look at the time...I have to be....not here." Xander spun on his heel and hurried away while he still had his dignity. He might be an idiot but he wasn't stupid.
***
Buffy Summers wondered if she were to lay her head down on to the book that she was reading would the information somehow seep into her brain thereby cutting out all that time she seemed to spend reading from her life. She let her head fall on to the table.
"My brain hurts." Buffy mumbled. "Is there no end to this research induced hell?"
"You've been reading for half an hour Buffy, don't be melodramatic." Rupert Giles clucked as he deposited another pile of heavy tomes on the library table. Last period, and more importantly school, was over of the pupils of Sunnydale High with the exception of Buffy, Willow and Xander. Defenders of the Hellmouth, warriors of the dark, consumers of too many donuts.
"Why did no one stop me at my forth?" Xander grumbled as his stomach tried to repel the glazed goodness he'd chugged down earlier that evening.
"We tried remember? You ran off with the box screaming like a girl." Willow spoke up from behind the computer she was studying intently.
"Oh yeah. My bad." Xander chuckled then winced when his stomach flipped in annoyance. "Scratch that. Donuts bad."
"Do you think it would be possible for everyone to at least try and concentrate for a little while?" Giles sighed taking off his glasses and cleaning them.
"Hate to nay-say you Watcher man but I don't think we're going to find anything about our slice and dicer in your turn of the century comic books." Xander slammed shut the heavy tome before him.
"I'm not even going to pretend to understand what you just said." Giles frowned and suddenly felt very old.
"That was Xander speak for 'we're not going to find whatever killed those poor girls by research'. Maybe I should patrol...." Buffy stood up eager to get out of the library and burn off some energy.
"I've just taken a sweep of the graveyard. Nothing new." Angel's voice slipped from the shadows of the stacks making every one jump at his sudden appearance.
"You have to stop doing that." Xander shook an annoyed finger at the vampire while he attempted to wring out the soda he'd spilt on his shirt when Angel had suddenly emerged.
"You might want to see a Doctor about that Harris." Angel smirked nodding at the soda stain on the front of the boys pants. Willow had to swallow the laugh that threatened to spill from her mouth.
"I didn't think you'd be around tonight." Buffy made her way over to Angel, unsure of how things stood between them anymore.
"Thought you might need a hand." Angel shrugged, he decided to leave out the fact that he was hoping to see Cordelia and discover what was going on with the young woman.
"Oh." Buffy gave him a sad smile.
"Yeah." Angel nodded.
An intense silence swallowed the room as slayer and vampire stood together in the middle of the room, Xander rolled his eyes, Willow bit her lip to muffle her romantic sigh and Giles cleaned his glasses.
"Oh for crapsake, don't you two ever get bored of the whole tragic Romeo and Juliet drama you've got going on?" Cordelia spoke up from where she stood unnoticed at the library doors.
"Will you people please stop with the sneaking!" Xander blustered as he leapt out of his chair.
"Still peeing in your pants Xander? I thought you'd stopped doing that in second grade." The cheerleader felt the first proper smile grace her lips that day as she teased the boy she'd known all her life. The strange sound of Angel laughing quietly halted any response Xander was about to throw at her.
Angel was laughing.
There was something very disturbing about that.
"What?" The vampire frowned when everyone's attention turned towards him.
"You. With the laughing." Buffy squinted at him. "Like, big chuckles laughing."
"It was funny." Angel shrugged.
"The world just got that much weirder." Xander shuddered and sat back down.
"Cordelia, what can we do for you?" Giles decided to bring the group back to some sort of order.
"Nothing really, I was just passing after practice....wondered what you guys were doing." Cordelia tried to sound as uninterested as she could, the truth was that she couldn't bare the thought of going back to that damn motel room just yet. She would never admit it but she longed for the company of others, even if it was Buffy and her band of freaks.
"And the weirdness multiplies." Xander looked at Cordelia in disbelief. "Angel laughing, Queen C thinking about something that isn't herself...it all sounds decidedly hell mouthy to me."
"But you're still a loser...so at least some things stay the same." Cordelia gave him a saccharine sweet smile.
"Score one for Cordelia." Buffy chuckled, relieved that the tension in the room had some what dissipated. Xander stuck his tongue out at Buffy and sat back down with a huff.
"Can we get back to the research now please?" Giles said with an annoyed sigh as he wandered in to his office. Rather surprisingly his charges did just that for once. Buffy joined Willow at the computer, Xander idly flicked through the book in front of him and Angel leant stoically against the counter, his arms crossed across his chest as he pretended not to be watching Cordelia out of the corner of his eye as she still stood by the doors, looking as though she couldn't decide whether to stay or leave.
"Cordelia will you be joining us?" Giles asked her as he crossed the room to the table. He ignored Xander's whine as he deposited another pile of books in front of him.
"I....sure." Cordelia shrugged, she shot Xander a death glare before he had the chance to say anything.
***
There was a comfortable silence inside the library as books were read and yet more donuts were devoured, the occasional hushed voice trickled through the room but mostly the practised quiet that only occurred between close friends reigned supreme.
Cordelia had never felt so out of place.
Words blurred and skid across the page she was reading, the dull ache that had began between her eyes earlier that day had graduated in to thick headache that flashed at the back of her eyes and turned her stomach with nausea. All she wanted to do was go home and crawl into her bed....but she didn't have a home to go to any more. So instead Cordelia sat with people that barely liked her because the thought of returning to her empty motel room threatened to make her cry. And she wouldn't, no, couldn't cry in front of these people. She could smile and bitch and roll her eyes and be the person they expected her to be but she couldn't cry. Not yet at least.
For the third time that evening the hairs on the back of Cordelia's neck stood to attention. She'd had the feeling that someone was watching her since last night and she hadn't been able to shake it, during cheer leading practise Cordelia had been so convinced she was being watched she'd missed two cues in a row. The feeling had only intensified during her time in the library. Her gaze drifted over the room, heads were bowed in concentration, everyone diligently reading except for....Angel? From the shadows of the staircase the vampire sat staring at her with such intensity it caused the cheerleader to shift nervously in her chair. Thinking that it was merely a reaction to her looking at him Cordelia averted her stare, counted to thirty then quickly flicked back to him.
Still the vampire watched her. Cordelia arched her eyebrows in a silent question of 'what you staring at bub?' yet Angel continued to observe her unfazed. For a fleeting moment their gazes locked and Cordelia felt as though he could read her every thought, see her every secret. A concern that she'd never seen directed at anyone but the slayer was emanating from the vampires eyes in her direction. Could he see her fears, see the truth behind the charade that was Cordelia Chase? Her stomach knotted at the unspoken thought. Before she realised she had moved Cordelia stood up, panicking for a reason she couldn't put into words.
"You OK Cordelia?" Willow asked the girl that had just pounced out of her chair as though she'd been electrocuted.
"Yeah....I have to go...." Her voice sounded forced even to her own ears, grabbing her purse she didn't look back as she walked as calmly as she could out of the library and away from the vampire's soul penetrating stare.
"Cordelia Chase. A whole new brand of crazy." Xander chuckled and reached for donut number seven.
***
Angel had been staring her, he couldn't help it. She'd seemed so distant from the rest of the group, so alone in a room full of people. He had watched Cordelia as she moved her body with practised ease through one routine after another with the rest of her cheerleader friends. Watched her as she'd laughed and joked, twirled her hair and flirted with the random jocks that had sauntered her way during practise. She didn't seem like the same lost girl he'd watched cry in a motel room the night before but as he studied Cordelia as she sat quietly reading, rubbing the muscles in her neck, Angel realised it was very much the same person, she was just wearing a different mask.
Then she'd caught him staring at her not once but twice yet Angel still didn't look away, too intent on trying to understand the mystery Cordelia guarded behind red glossy lips and perfect hair. He saw a flash of panic in her eyes and then she was gone. With one look Angel had spooked her like a frightened deer.
"Walk me home?" Buffy asked him before he even noticed the petite slayer was standing next to him. "Angel, you awake?"
"Sorry..." The vampire shook his head and dragged his gaze away from the library doors. He wondered how long he'd been staring at them after Cordelia had dashed through them. Xander and Willow must have left soon after the brunette because the only people left were himself Buffy and Giles.
"Sure, lets go." Angel offered her a smile as he stood up, feeling guilty that his thoughts had been so consumed by Cordelia, Angel slipped an arm around Buffy's small shoulders. She gazed at him oddly before slipping her arms around his waist, Buffy knew they were still due to finish the conversation they'd started two nights ago but right now she was content to simply walk home quietly with the man she was falling in love with.
***
Three Advils and two slices of pizza later Cordelia sat crossed legged in sweat pants and a vest on her bed in her motel room. She threw an unwanted crust at the fuzzy tv as David Letterman repeated the same overused phrase again and again until she was sure her ears were going to bleed. Cordelia was about to fire another dough missile when three short sharp knocks echoed on her door making her jump with surprise from the bed, knocking over her food.
"Oh crap." Cordelia muttered as a dark coffee stain spread across her bed sheets. "Well that's just perfect." She reached to clean up the mess when the knocks resounded against the door once again. Moving quickly to the window Cordelia peeked through the blinds to see who it was but whoever it was was out of her line of sight.
Biting her lip Cordelia slipped the chain lock across the door, then cautiously unlocked the dead bolt and turned the door handle. Standing on the other side of the door was the last person she expected to see, she instinctively tried to push the door shut but a large black boot was in the way.
"Cordelia, I think you'd better tell me what you're doing here don't you?" Angel frowned and crossed his arms over his chest. Cordelia swallowed.
Oh crap.
Part 3
"Cordelia, I think you'd better tell me what you're doing here don't you?" Angel frowned and crossed his arms over his chest. Cordelia swallowed.
Oh crap.
"I'm kinda busy right now Angel so if you don't mind..." Cordelia tried to close the door again but Angel's hand joined his boot in refusing to let her shut it.
"Are you going to let me in or am I going to have to break the door down? It's your choice." He refused to back down.
"I'm not inviting you in so there's really no point." Cordelia refused to meet his gaze, staring intently instead at the thin chain lock that was keeping the world outside.
"I don't need an invite, it's not a home Cordelia, it's a rancid motel." Angel watched the flash of pain shadow her face for only a moment before her eyes turned indifferent, he could almost see her change in persona.
"Well thank you for clearing that up for me Angel, and here was I thinking it was a penthouse suite at the Ritz." Cordelia hissed at him. Angel realised he'd said exactly the wrong thing, as usual, but there was no way he was leaving here without an explanation as to what the Sunnydale head cheerleader was doing in a place like this.
"Cordelia....please just let me in." He pleaded with her. Cordelia had never heard such emotion in the normally stoic vampire's voice. Granted she hadn't spent a huge amount of time with Angel, barely knew him in fact, but she realised this was something very uncommon for the vampire.
"Why?" She arched an eyebrow at him in question.
"Because I'm worried about you." He told her honestly. Cordelia felt her iron resolve slipping away. Angel was worried about her. A man she had scarcely spent more then a few hours with since she'd met him was worried about her. Cordelia couldn't remember the last time anyone cared like that. Her whirl wind thought process shifted at lightning speed. Why did he care? What did he want in return?
They always want something in return.
"I'm fine." Cordelia told him frostily. "Goodnight Angel." She managed to get the door closed this time. Cordelia tried to ignore the way her hands were shaking as she crossed the room to the small bathroom.
When the door crashed in she let out a yelp of surprise.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?!" Cordelia roared at Angel as he kicked the door shut with his foot.
"I gave you a choice Cordelia, let me in or I'd let myself in." He told her nonchalantly.
"You broke the door! I can't believe you broke the door! You're insane!"
"Calm down, I only snapped the chain lock, which looks like it was on its last legs anyway." Angel said as his gaze wandered around the small room, it was worse than he'd initially thought. "What on earth are you doing in this place Cordelia?"
"It's none of your business." She scowled at him, she folded her arms in defiance. Angel tried to ignore the way her arms pushed her chest upwards inside her vest top but failed, he was a man after all.
"Well I'm making it my business." Angel crossed his arms also.
The vampire and the cheerleader stood off against each other, neither willing to budge an inch. Their postures told of a stubbornness inherent in both of their personalities.
"I'm not leaving." He declared confidently and he meant it. The tragic image of a scared young woman crying alone in this room engulfed every particle of his being. He couldn't leave, he'd seen too much.
"How did you know I was here?" She asked him as her brain finally woke up to the fact that no one knew where she was living and yet Buffy Summers vampire boyfriend was standing in front of her demanding answers to questions that were none of his business.
"I followed you home last night."
"YOU WHAT?!"
"I was worried, you seemed..."
"You're doing a lot of worrying over a girl you hardly know Angel. Take my advice, don't. I'm fine and if you ever stalk me again I will tell your girlfriend."
"I didn't stalk you, I was just making sure you got home OK, this is the hellmouth you're living on remember? This is the last place I expected you to be living Cordelia...I thought...."
"What? That I was a spoilt bitch that lived in a mansion with a million servants and Daddy's gold card?" A manic laugh bubbled up in her throat. "Well Angel, I'm full of surprises. Guess what? I'm a fake, a fraud. My entire life has gone down the crapper and everything I own is in this room, happy now?" The laugh choked into a sob before she could stop it. The vampire instinctively moved towards Cordelia when her armour slipped but the brunette stepped back, her hand outstretched before her, blocking him.
"What do you want?" There was a slight waver in her voice but Cordelia had managed to gain her composure just as quickly as she had lost it. Angel had never seen the girl in such a mess.
"What do you mean....?" He shook his head in confusion.
"What do you want from me? You've found out Queen C is slumming it and I don't buy the 'I'm worried about you' bull shit. You want something and I want to know what right the hell now!" She fumed.
"I couldn't give a fuck if you're the Queen of England Cordelia, I'm a two hundred and forty one year old vampire and I really couldn't care less about your social standing in High School. I don't want anything from you."
"Then why are you..."
"Because the girl I saw cry herself to sleep last night looked like she needed help." He told the young woman gently.
"I'm fine."
"Dammit Cordelia you're not fine!" Angel roared at her, surprising them both with the intensity of his voice. This wasn't the vampire's usual behaviour, he was well aware of that, but in the short amount of time he'd been in the room with her she had infuriated him in a way very few had in a long time. He watched as Cordelia's shoulders slump, the same gesture of defeat he'd seen her do last night. Without meeting his eyes she sat down on to the bed that was beside her, her elbows on her knees, her head in her hands. Angel, unsure what to do, moved over to the plastic chair opposite her. The motel room was so small their knees almost touched.
"What happened?" Angel asked her tentatively once the silence had settled so thick it even made him feel uncomfortable. Cordelia finally looked at him, her eyes were red but there were no tears running down her face. When she spoke her voice was raspy and quiet.
"My Dad...he lost everything. The IRS finally caught up with him."
"Where are your parents?"
"Hiding from the tax man somewhere." Cordelia shrugged.
"Why didn't you go with them?" Angel frowned, he didn't understand why the Chases would leave there daughter behind.
"Because I didn't. I've got a life here....well, I had a life here."
"You should be with your parents." He insisted.
"Look Angel, I don't know where they are OK? Mom and Dad never gave me the choice. They left before I even knew they'd gone. All I got was a scribbled note from my Mom, my car, the few clothes that I could salvage and my dignity. Although it looks like I've lost that too." Cordelia angrily brushed away the tear that was creeping down her face. She couldn't believe she was crying in front of Angel, couldn't believe she'd just told him the secret that had hung heavily around her neck for months.
Before Angel knew what he was doing he brushed a stray strand of chocolate hair away from Cordelia's face and tucked it behind her ear. A tender gesture so uncommon to them both that it was startling in its intensity.
Cordelia shifted her gaze away from the vampires and focused intently on the worn area of the carpet by her feet. Angel sat back in his chair, confused at his action. He shifted in his seat and cleared his throat nervously.
"You..." Angel's sentence was cut to the quick when the nightly shouting began in the next room, a loud thump drew both their gazes to the wall, Cordelia grimaced when the faded painting rattled under the force of the blow. She closed her eyes when the increasingly familiar voices seeped into her room. Bitch. Bastard. Whore. Pig. She'd fallen a sleep every night with these overheard words rattling around her brain. Angel's lip twitch as the unmistakable smell of blood assaulted his sense.
"You can't stay here Cordelia." Angel said forcefully as the shouting continued.
"I don't have anywhere else to go." She said vacantly, still staring at the paint peeling wall.
"You must have someone you can stay with." He said in disbelief.
"I don't." Cordelia dismissed him, finally looking at him again.
"Surely if you speak to someone about your situation, maybe Mr Giles...."
"NO! No one can know about this. You have to promise me that you won't tell anyone about me. Please Angel." Cordelia hated the way she was begging him, Queen C begged for nothing, but she was desperate.
"OK Cordelia, OK. I won't tell anyone." Angel said quickly, brown eyes frenzied with panic pinned him to his seat.
"Promise me." Cordelia beseeched him.
"I promise." He nodded in reluctant acquiescence. "But it doesn't solve the problem."
Cordelia stood quickly and walked to the door, she fingered the decimated chain lock, Angel was right, it was the only damage done to the door but she would still have to pay for it. Her dwindling bank account would not be happy with her. She heard Angel stand as she opened the door, a cool stream of air whipped in and Cordelia breathed in deeply. It was stuffy and claustrophobic in the motel room but every resident of Sunnydale knew you kept your door shut and locked at night, no matter how much you needed to breathe.
"It's not your problem to solve Angel." She said as she turned around to face him. The scared girl that had begged a promise from him seconds ago was replaced with an iron resolve. "It's late and I have school in the morning, so if you don't mind." Cordelia gestured for him to leave.
"I can't leave you here Cordelia." Angel joined her at the door, the vehement concern in his words made the cheerleader feel sick and ashamed at herself and her situation.
"What, are you gonna rescue me Angel? Be my knight in shining armour?" She didn't wait for him to reply and she didn't need to, the awkward shift of his shoulders and the nervous flick of his eyes spoke more then any words could. "I don't think so." Cordelia hustled him through the door, unsure what to do Angel simply let himself be booted out.
"I...."
"Goodnight Angel." Cordelia closed the door and flicked the dead bolt before he could blink. So much for vampire reflexes. Through the thin wood he could hear Cordelia's muffled footsteps as she wandered across the room, then the squeak of springs as she sat down on the bed. Angel leant back against the door with a sigh. He didn't know what he was doing.
He couldn't leave her here on her own.
Angel slid down to the grimy floor, crossing his legs at the ankle and wrapping his duster around him.
He couldn't leave.
***
The vampire didn't move until the threat of sunrise forced him into the sewers, with troubled footsteps Angel lumbered back to his apartment to wait for the night.
***
The roar of the crowd and the familiar pull of her muscles let Cordelia's mind drift away from her troubles. Focusing on her practised routine and moving in time with her fellow cheerleaders Cordelia was Queen C again for a little while, she blew kisses to the guys playing football, laughed at the fashion mistakes on parade in the stands. For a little while all was normal once again in Cordelia Chase's world.
Normal until the hair on the back of her neck prickled and she instantly knew he was there watching over her again. Cordelia knew Angel had sat outside her motel room all night, she'd listened to him shift when he was uncomfortable, heard him random muttering obscenities into the night.
Why the vampire had stayed she didn't know.
Was it pity? Curiosity? A misplaced sense of responsibility on the vampires behalf? Cordelia had no idea but as much as she hated to admit it last night was the best night sleep she'd had ever since her world had crumbled down around her.
Turning around in a circle Cordelia scanned the bleachers for the man she knew was watching her every move. She saw Xander and Willow chatting happily with Giles and Ms Calender but no Angel.
"Whatcha doing Cor?" Aura asked her in between demure sips of her bottled water.
"Huh? Oh....nothing." Cordelia flashed her a smile. "Just marvelling at the fashion disaster that is Willow Rosenburg."
"Horrifying isn't it?" Aura snorted viciously. "You know, if she wore a little make up and stopped wearing those awful corduroy dresses she likes so much....well, she'd still be a loser...."
Cordelia tuned the air head out as she continued her scanning of the crowd. She sucked in a surprised breath when she saw him, she thought he would have hidden in a shadowy corner, skulked as vampires do, so to see him leaning casually against the bleacher railing not ten meters away from her was a little unsettling. Why she hadn't seen him there already she wasn't sure.
"I'll be back in a minute...." Cordelia muttered at a still rambling Aura and strode towards Angel, annoyance oozing out of her every pore.
"Peanut?" Angel offered her when she came to a halt in front of him, her hands on her hips, foot tapping against the ground in irritation. "They're very good." He shook the bad invitingly, when she didn't reply he shrugged and popped another nut in to his mouth.
"I didn't think vampires ate?" The cheerleader asked him before she could help herself.
"We are a complex people." Angel's mouth twitched in what Cordelia thought could either be a smile or indigestion.
"Whatever." She rolled her eyes at him. "I told you I don't need a white knight." Cordelia frowned at him.
"I'm not here to rescue you Cordelia." He did smile that time. The part of her brain that she refused to listen to told her he had a very nice smile.
"Then why are you here? I doubt you came for the football and ambience." Cordelia arched an eyebrow at him.
"I made a decision last night." Angel screwed up the peanut bag and threw it with disturbing accuracy in the trash bin.
"Good for you." She fluffed her bangs out of her eyes in a clear sign of boredom. It didn't phase Angel though, he knew this was just another act. He'd seen the real Cordelia Chase.
"Do you want to know what the decision was?"
"What I want is for you to stop stalking me."
"I decided." Angel ignored her. "That you and I are going to be friends."
"I don't need...."
"Tough. Get use to it. We're friends." Angel dismissed the argument that was heading his way. "They're starting without you. " He nodded over to where her squad were lining up for the next routine. Cordelia's head turned from the vampire to the field and back again. She was torn between losing herself in her cheers and shouting at the frustrating vampire that had decided to play the big brother act with her.
"You're infuriating." Cordelia scowled at him then turned on her heel and strode back to the field. Angel tried not to watch the way her hips moved as she walked. He failed.
"See you later friend." Angel called out to her. Cordelia flipped him the finger making Angel laugh loudly. Twice in as many days that had happened, it even worried him.
Angel had spent the day pacing his small apartment, trying to think up ways to convince Cordelia that she needed to tell some one about her situation, let some one help her. It had taken him a while to figure out the fact that she had told some one.
Him.
In his gloomy apartment, as he waited for the damn sun to set, Angel had decided that he was going to help Cordelia Chase whether she liked it or not.
Continue on...