Title: Out of Whack
Author: anne
Posted: 04-19-2003
Email:
Rating: NC17
Category: Time Travel
Content:
Summary: Sequel to ‘A Little Ways Back’ which was a sequel to 'Into the Past' and 'Now Onto to the Present’.
Spoilers:
Disclaimer: The characters in the Angelverse were created by Joss Whedon & David Greenwalt. No infringement is intended, no profit is made.
Distribution: NF for sure, and anyone else that has my stuff
Notes:
Feedback: Always welcomed- and needed for this storyPart 17
“Wesley,” Fred yelled louder than was needed. Wesley poked his head out of his office staring where the young woman pointed.
Gunn practically jumped the stairs, taking the steps three at a time to get to Fred’s yell.
“Is that what I think it is.” Gunn stopped in front of the cackling air and expanding tear in the hotel’s atmosphere.
“The Portal is opening,” Wesley confirmed.
“Angel and Cordy are coming home.” Fred wrung her hands.
“I hope. Charles, the weapons as a precaution.”
Gunn got the tranquilizer guns handing one to Wesley.
The trio stood anxious waiting for the portal to fully form. Wesley and Gunn raised their guns as a figure in a leather duster jumped through.
The vampire paused staring at the weapons then up at the faces of the men. “Wesley, Gunn?”
“Angel,” Wesley asked tentatively.
“Yes.” He raised the glowing orb and smiled. “And more importantly Cordy.”
Wesley let out a grateful sigh. “Thank god,” he went to get the orb, only stopping at Angel’s growl.
“Of course, upstairs. Cordelia will be fine, all we have to do is break the orb.”
“Shit, throw it on the ground and stomp it.” Gunn suggested. “Or not.” He added at the vampire’s other growl as he followed Wesley up the staircase.
“What I say?”
Fred rolled her eyes as she moved behind Angel. “You just told Angel to stomp all over Cordy’s soul.”
Gunn nodded. “Oh, when you put it like that I deserved the growl.”
“Yep.” Fred shot over her shoulder. “Are you coming?”
“Hell yeah.”
***
Angel and the rest of Angel’s Investigations surrounded the lone figure on the bed.
“Angel,” Wesley called.
Angel stared. It was Cordelia but not. He needed time. “Alone.”
Wesley paused and looked at the others. Wesley was sure that his expression matched their disappointed ones. They all wanted to be there when Cordelia woke up. He sighed and nodded. Angel had been through a lot. Wesley knew how frantic the vampire had been at the realization that Cordelia was alone facing two Angelus. Angel had the right.
“All you have to is break the orb,” Wesley repeated. “And when you both are ready, we all would like to hear about what happened.” He urged the others out of the room.
“Wes,” Gunn whispered.
“No. Let them be alone. After all, everything is fine. We took the wafers and my memory is the same,” he looked to the others. Gunn nodded along with Fred.
The young woman shrugged. “It hasn’t even been an hour since he left.”
Gunn wiped a hand over his head. “This time shit freaks me out.”
“Yes.” Wesley agreed. “Now that Cordelia and Angel are home, it’s time we devise a way for Wolfram & Hart not to utilize the portal’s again.”
“I’m all….”
“Other than blowing up the law firm.”
“It would work.”
“It’s short term. We need a long term solution.”
“Blowing them back to hell, seems pretty long term to my way of thinking,” Gunn grumbled to Fred as they followed Wesley back down the stairs.
Part 18
Angel on the edge of the bed and placed the orb on the night side table. He looked around, scenting the room. It was his and Cordy’s. His memory wasn’t affected. He didn’t recognize any of it, except the young woman on the bed. His hand brushed at the hair, running his fingers through the strands. Shorter. He studied the body. It was fuller more rounded than the teenage version. Different but the same. Angel brushed at the marks on the delicate neck, lowering his face. Exactly the same. His Cordelia. He lifted up handling the orb in his palm staring at the glow. Truly his Cordelia. The vampire closed his fist around the fragile glass.
Cordelia shot up on the bed her eyes wide. “Angel.”
“Here.” He held out his hands. “You’re home.”
Cordelia stared at the vampire, then down at her body. She jumped out of the bed running to the full-length mirror. She patted at her hair. “Yep.” She yanked up her shirt. “It’s back.” She said happily, running her fingers over her scar.
Angel stood watching the lone reflection in the mirror. He eyes narrowed at the mar on her beautiful skin. What the hell was that? What caused that pain? It better be dead whatever it was.
“Weird,” Cordelia shot over her shoulder. “That I’d actually be glad to have Xander’s break up reminder on me, uh.”
Angel growled. The moron did that to her. He needed to quietly check with Wesley to find out if the boy was still alive and if so why.
“The sun,” She laughed. “It’s really me.”
Angel’s eyes went to the small of her back. It was a sun, tucked in the curve of Cordelia’s backside a magnet for the eyes, begging to be touched.
So much he didn’t know, so much he wanted so badly to learn. “You’re home.” He repeated.
“I’m home. We’re home,” she turned staring up at the handsome vampire. She frowned. Okay, she was happy, no doubt about it, but the ache was still there. “Are you sure you weren’t hurt,” she patted at the vampire’s chest and stomach, trying to find the reason for her angst.
“I told you I was fine.” He held her hands up.
“Yeah, you did, but sometimes you’ve been known to fib a bit about that.”
Angel’s lips twitched in the beginnings of a smile. A smile. Angel had done it. He was going to have the future he wanted.
“Not this time. Cordy,”
“Hmm.”
“Can I please kiss you?”
Cordelia crinkled her brow. “Since when have you asked?” She giggled. “Wow, time in Sunnydale as made a gentleman out of the vamp.”
Angel frowned. How had the vampire with a soul treated her? Had he no consideration of the value of the woman.
“Oh, don’t scowl, of course you can. I’ve been waiting for like ages.”
Ages. God, she didn’t even know the meaning of the word. Angel leaned in, his hands gently cupping her face, marveling at the colors flashing in the hazel eyes. He touched his lips against the softer ones. He tensed waiting for the scream, the fear. He blinked as he got more laughter.
Cordelia pushed away his soft kiss. “Gee, I won’t break.”
Angel stared. She hadn’t screamed. “I…no, you won’t will you. Too strong.” He leaned back in this time taking the lips, pressing against them, moving his as his tongue teased. Angel felt weak in the knees as she responded, pushing her body in, meeting his questing tongue, allowing him to taste. Angel got lost in the kiss, reliving the flavor that had driven his demon wild. The soft moans became pleas of fear. Angel jerked up.
“Angel, what?” Cordelia blinked up.
Angel shook his head. She still hadn’t screamed. It was just his imagination.
“Angel, are you all right?” Cordelia puzzled her brow as she caressed the strong planes of his face. Something wasn’t right. Angel was acting weird and she still had that strange aching sadness. She had to talk to Wesley. Maybe they screwed up again somehow.
“I…I just want to love you.”
“Okay with me, but you seem…”
“I just…”
“Scared too, uh. I hate these time trips. We never seem to know if we are coming or going.”
Angel nodded, latching on to the excuse. “Let’s just,” he stared at the soft lips. “Kiss again.”
Cordelia nodded. “And again, again.”
“You talk too much.” He raised a brow.
Cordelia laughed. “There’s my Angel.” She cupped his face and kissed, opening her mouth giving the joining depth and texture.
Angel staggered, wrapping his arm around the young woman’s waist as he stumbled back on the bed. She was kissing him. There was passion and it was for him. No other. He kissed back, giving her everything-need, desire, love- coating it with his mouth and tongue. The guilt and screams were being pushed away as the longing took over.
Cordelia pushed away the sense of wrongness because it was right. She was home with Angel. Everything would be fine.
***
Cordelia moved tentatively drawing her body out from under Angel’s. She plopped her body on to the chair and stared at the sleeping vampire. She didn’t understand. The ache was still present. The knowing that something had happened to Angel but Angel was there. She just made love to him. Cordelia just saw every part of his body and he hadn't been injured. So, why wasn’t she ecstatic? Something was wrong.
She watched the sleeping form as she pulled on some clothes. She just hoped that Wesley was still in the hotel. The feelings she was having were too upsetting, too real to ignore.
***
“Oh good, you are still here.” She peeked into Wesley’s office.
The man looked up adjusting his glasses. “Cordy,” he stood, opening his arms for a hug.
Cordelia happily obliged. This felt right, Wesley holding her. Her friend. It felt more right than the love making upstairs.
“We missed you.” Wesley leaned back, a smile centered on his face.
“How long were we gone?”
“An hour, but it was a really long hour.”
“I can imagine.” She frowned.
“Cordy, what is it?” Wesley sat sensing the young woman’s unease. He was sure that the soul spell hadn’t been painful. Oh lord, what if his research had been wrong.
Cordelia curled up in one of the chairs. “I’m not sure, maybe nothing. I just don’t know.”
“Cordy?” Wesley leaned in over the desk getting concerned.
Cordelia took a deep breath. “It doesn’t seem right.” She blurted out.
“What doesn’t?”
“Angel, me, it just doesn’t feel right.”
“Cordy, before we sent Angel after you- Gunn, Fred, and I took a potion, wafer rather, to retain our memories if some how Angel’s appearance in 1998 changed history so we could fix it. None of us have had any indication that our memories our invalid.”
“Which Angel?”
“Excuse me?”
“Angel A or Angel B?”
“Cordy?” Wesley was more than a little confused.
“Wesley, you sent an Angel from the future to warn me and our Angel about a screw up in the time line.”
Wesley leaned back in his chair. “I did?”
“Yeah, a dark broody souled Angel. One that existed because Angelus of 1998, him, had noticed me and put me in a coma.”
“Oh dear.” Wesley slumped and tried to think quickly. “But, you are here so the wafers and whatever I did worked.” He sat back up.
“That’s just it. Did it?”
“I…yes. Fred, Gunn, and I all remember. Angel, our Angel left only a few hours ago to find you. It actually had only been an hour but you and Angel have been upstairs for a while. Cordelia what do you think is wrong?”
Cordelia pulled up her knees not wanting to say her concerns out loud but she had to know. “Angel is acting different.”
“Different.” Wesley blinked and then moved to jump out of his seat. “Oh god, Angelus.”
“No.” Cordelia waved the man back in his seat. “No.” she repeated. “It’s just.”
“Cordy,” Wesley flopped back down in his chair.
“I…this personal okay.” She glared.
Wesley nodded.
“Since Angel and I said we loved each other and well, since….”
Wesley held up his hand. “Are you about to give me details of your sex lives?”
Cordelia blew out a breath of air. “Like I want to share, but Wesley something’s not right. Angel, no matter how dorky or whatever was never so…”
“Cordelia.”
“Wesley.” Cordelia had to make him understand. “Please just listen, have your blushes later, please.”
Wesley reluctantly nodded.
“Thank you. It’s just that upstairs just now- he was so loving- the same but different. Angel,” Cordelia paused and took another deep breath, her eyes driving hard into her friend. “If this turns out to be nothing, you keep this between us, you got it.” She demanded.
Wesley nodded and for the first time regretted his friendship with Cordelia. Why did she have to choose him for this? Why not Fred? Isn't that what girl friends were for, sharing intimate details?
Cordelia licked her lips and plunged. “The first time we made love was after Angelus of 1898 and the marks. It was…”
Wesley resisted the urge to cover his ears.
“It was everything, Wesley. He loved me. I loved him. The marks, well, he fixed it so neither of us would ever think of Angelus. It was us, just us.”
Wesley blinked that wasn’t so bad. “And… I don’t…”
“I don’t either.” Cordelia hugged her knees closer. “Since then, well you know Angel, he’s been dorky, silly, overbearing, over protective…whenever I had a vision, he’d treat me like I was china even after you found the potion, right, you saw that, right?”
Wesley nodded.
“Okay, but, you see, when we were alone together making love, Angel had no dorkiness or mother hen routine, he knew that he could make me scream out….he knew that when…”
“Cordelia, stop” Wesley held up his hands. “Isn’t there a way you can tell me what you are trying to tell me with out going into details? You were starting off quite well, relatively speaking, anyway.”
“God, you are such an old maid. All I want to say is that,” she waved her hand to the ceiling. “It was wonderful, loving, everything, but not right. He was too scared or tentative or ….god what am I trying to say.” She glared at Wesley.
“I have no idea.”
“He treated me like I was fragile, like every touch had to be asked for, he wasn’t sure that I’d accept, he didn’t want to,” she brushed at her neck. “Or he just wouldn’t. I don’t know, Wesley, that wasn’t the vampire I’ve made love to for the last several months and he didn’t yell at me.”
Wesley blinked, trying to think. “Cordy, or you saying that you are having a problem with having wonderful sex with the person you love but it was too gentle, too tentative and he didn’t yell at you.”
Cordelia bit her lip. “Yeah, I guess.”
Wesley brushed at his head. “I don’t know what to say. You didn’t feel threatened by Angel, is that correct?”
“No, of course not.”
“Then.”
“It just wasn’t right…and what about the ache and the pain.”
“Oh god, he caused you pain, do I need to hear this, I know I don’t want too. Do I need to be worried, should I call Gunn?”
“Oh, get grip. No. In the past, in 1998, I was at Buffy’s, Angel and Angel B had shoved me over there to be safe. Angel told me too wait for him. But, while I was at Buffy’s….it almost like a vision, real, but different, the pain wasn’t in my head, but here,” she clutched at her chest. “I knew then that something had happened to Angel, I just knew it, but then I saw him and he was fine and he…it was okay…it was…”
Wesley glanced at tearing young woman. “Cordy, what is it?”
Cordelia gulped and brushed at her face. “I don’t think I love him any more. Something must have happened, something must have went wrong.”
“Cordy.”
“Wesley, he didn’t know my body, he didn’t know me. At least that’s how it felt. I don’t understand. He’s different or I’m different. I don’t know. But it’s not right. I feel him, I see him and wonder. I never wondered whether I loved him. But, now…I don’t know.”
Wesley brushed at his face. “Cordy, there is nothing to indicate that something went wrong during Angel’s 1998 trip.”
“Angel B” She shot out.
“Point. But, Fred, Gunn and I took the wafers, we obviously sent this B Angel to fix whatever happened. And it must have been fixed because nothing has changed since Angel left except you both are back.”
“But.”
“Cordy. I…” Wesley readjusted his glasses. “Cordy, both you and Angel have gone through a traumatizing experience. Angel went to a time where you were in danger from not one Angelus but two and now you tell me there was another Angel thrown in. That had to be difficult for him, just as it must have been difficult for you. You know how Angel acted before when he interacted with Angelus. He was angry, guilty, and scared for you. It was double that this time and you- well, really Cordy, was it easy for you to face two Angelus’ knowing what they had planned for you, knowing that they were Angel.”
“I…”
“No, Cordy, both of you are feeling the effects. Don’t let that ruin your love for each other. Give it time.”
“So, you think it just a post traumatic thing a ma jig.”
“That would be my guess, yes.”
“Okay,” Cordelia got up her brow still furrowed. “You are sure?”
“Cordy, do you love Angel.”
Cordy’s mind went immediately to the vampire that save her from 1898 and threw her in the tub. The vampire that coddled her when she had a vision, the vampire that listened as if she was the only one that could speak, the vampire that was brave and loved her. How could she not? “Of course.”
“Then yes, I am sure.”
***
The vampire backed away from the door going back to the stairs. It was a potentially tense moment but averted by rationalization and hopeful thinking.
He hurried up to the bedroom. She would be back. He had a major rage moment when he woke up and realized that Cordelia was absent. Well, after his major chuckle moment. God, he had been stupid.
The vampire settled his self on the bed and waited. He buried his head into the pillow as he scented her coming into the room. Patience, he willed. Patience.
“You’re awake. Can’t fool me.” She brushed his shoulder.
“I didn’t think you’d appreciate me dragging you out of Wesley’s office.”
“How much of that did you hear?” she narrowed her eyes.
“Oh, I don’t know, that you suddenly decided that you don’t like the way I make love.”
“I never said that.”
“It didn’t feel right.” He mimicked.
“Angel.”
“And telling Wesley. I thought spreading sex tales was for the boys in the locker room. Tsk. Tsk. Cordy.”
“Angel…” Cordelia stood unsure at the vampire’s tone.
“Cordy,” The vampire grabbed her hand pulling her onto the bed. “I’m not mad. Wesley was right and I understand why you are feeling hesitant. I do too.” He shrugged sitting up against the backboard of the bed.
“You do?” Cordelia puzzled.
“Sure. We were in Sunnydale, not a happy memory place, you surrounded by Angelus’ and Angels’. Not a stress-free time. Hence, shoving you into the bathroom.”
“But…”
The vampire reached out his hand to cup her chin. “You are mine. I get a little anxious when others even other me’s get involved. What if you liked one of the others better.”
“Angel, I wouldn’t…”
“Of course not. But, don’t you think it’s time you proved it,” he grabbed at her head, pulling her lips towards his.
Cordelia jerked back. Okay, the too gentlemanly vampire was gone, but now…Her eyes widened in a sickening thought.
“You are quick on the soulless bit aren’t you? It’s just the soul bit you are slow on.” Angelus laughed, clamping his hand over her mouth, his body covering hers immobilizing it.
“Ooh, no kick to the groin or sneaky vamp hunter move. God you are wondrous, all mine, and this time I’m not wasting time on games.” He plunged his fangs and cock hard into the struggling body.
Cordelia fought but her body was pinned the only leeway given was when the vampire thrust, but it was too fast and hard for her to move. The blood was draining fast from her body. The world was spinning and fading, but nowhere did she get the answers of how she was dying in Angelus’ embrace.
***
Angelus withdrew from the lax body. He sensed the hotel as he drew a cut into his chest. Wesley was gone and the only vibrant heart was from the woman down the hall. Convenient. Cordy would need food when she woke. Angelus cradled the body close to his chest urging her lips over the flowing self-made wound. He growled as her cooling lips sucked taking in the blood that filled him.
Angelus gently laid the woman on the bed. He debated about leaving and going to the nourishment down the hall, wanting to give Cordelia a gift when she woke. But, he didn’t know if Angel had ever been invited into Fred’s room before, probably, but it wasn’t a chance he would take just then. This time he would wait patiently. Wesley wasn’t in the hotel, Gunn wasn’t. Fred wouldn’t bother the couple. He would have all night. Then he would act. So, he just waited, pulling the body close, studying the soft contours and the strength underneath. God, she would be amazing when she woke and was finally his.
Part 19
Cordelia pushed against the body that held her. She was starving. She growled and shoved, the body next her held nothing to cure the hunger.
Angelus shot up at the movement. “Sleeping beauty awakes.” He smiled.
Cordelia looked at the vampire and then her surroundings. “I’m hungry.”
“Of course you are.”
“Well, if you knew that why isn’t there a body tied up for me. It’s not like there isn’t one just down the hall.” She growled.
Angelus sat up. His beautiful childe definitely grooved right into the undead mode.
“She’s in her room, I can’t get in.”
“You didn’t even try did you?” Cordelia rolled her eyes.
“A waste of time and possible alarm ringing.”
Cordelia stared at the vampire. “You, dumb ass, have Carte Blanc into Fred’s room, she invited you in months ago.”
“Oh.” Angelus brows rose. “Was the soul doing her too?”
Cordelia smacked him. “Don’t be an idiot.”
Angelus lurched, covering Cordelia’s body with his own. “I’m your sire.” He growled a warning.
“Pfft.” She pushed. “I’m hungry.”
“I want to have sex.”
“I want to eat.” She kicked at the vampire.
“You aren’t acting right.”
“Maybe you should’ve driven me crazy first. Hmmph.” Cordelia got off the bed. “Go get her. I can’t. I’m dead.”
“You expect me your sire too feed you?” He growled.
Cordelia walked over to the vampire, stroking his chest. “I expect you too feed me so I’ll have the appropriate desire to fuck you into next week and then go kill Wesley so he doesn’t figure out the time spell to change this little divergence.”
“Oh.”
“Oh.” Cordelia backed up. “Before you go though, tell me. You aren’t my Angel, so what- in Angel A and B’s little sortie to bag the Angelus’ he got killed and you decide to take his place? Though, I’m still a little hazy why you are here. You had a soul when we left 1998.”
“Your Angel?”
“Well, he was the one I knew.”
Angelus chuckled. “It’s really kind of funny. The Angel B, as you called him, me, decided that he wanted the future of the other soul boy so he killed him, really, he had good intentions, love you, keep you safe, but he forgot one important thing in his obsession, his soul wasn’t bound. So, here I am- and I’ve really missed you. Can’t tell you how happy I am that I got to finish what I started in 1998 or was it 1898. When we are done here, I’ve still a grudge to settle with the slayer.”
“Still obsessed with the blonde one, that makes me warm and fuzzy inside.”
“Oh please, revenge is all I want. She interrupted something that should have been done four years ago. You are mine.” He pulled Cordelia towards him, sharp teeth nicking at the permanent marks displayed.
“Oh, I can understand revenge, I’ve a list. After you feed me, maybe I’ll tell you,” she teased, kissing at him, biting at his mouth.
Angelus kissed back then pushed. “You are going to be handful.”
“Did you really expect anything different?”
“No.” Angelus laughed.
“Hey.” She called as the vampire moved towards the door.
Angelus turned.
“Less shock and more cooperation if you don’t show up at Fred’s door-naked. She’d blush, then that quick brain of hers would start to think rapid thoughts and she keeps experiments in her room ones that always seem to shoot sharp deadly objects.”
Angelus nodded, opening the closet. “Any suggestions. Don’t want to look gay.”
Cordelia chuckled and went under the vampire’s arm to pull out some clothes. “Leather pants and a tasteful black sweater.”
“No color?”
“No soul. And I think I can tell you this now, you look really hot in all black. Mysterious, sexy, dangerous, edible. But, hey, go for the biker Lorne look if you want.”
Angelus gripped at her shoulders. “Joke, tease all you want, but KNOW what you are.”
Cordelia cocked a brow. “And what exactly am I other than a vampire, a very hungry one at that.”
“You are mine. You will do what I say.”
Cordelia scoffed. “Get over yourself. When I was Angel’s I never did what he said unless he had a good reason. That won’t change. Deal with it or chose another playmate.”
“You are a pain in the ass.”
Cordelia laughed. “I think that was one of the unspoken reasons why Angel loved me and why Angelus wanted me, what do you think?”
“I think you are mine,” Angelus shoved her against he wall, pounding in her with one stroke, moving then with a force that had Cordelia slamming into the walls.
Cordelia clutched at the dark head, pushing back with inhuman force, letting the violent coupling continue into both vampires were gasping and shuddering.
“You’ll do.” She moved her hips releasing the vampire, giving him a coy smile.
Angelus laughed. “You are mine.”
Cordelia laughed. “Whatever you think, sire.” She bowed. “I’m hungry.”
“Bitch,” he laughed pulling on the pants Cordelia had thrown out of the closet and tugging on the sweater she picked out.
“But, I’m cute.” She smiled after the vampire.
“You’re fucking gorgeous and you know it.” He shut the door.
Cordelia stared at the closed door. God she really was hungry.
Part 20
Cordelia paced the room, gnawing at her lips. Waiting, wondering, thinking, not at all sure what she would do when the vampire came back with Fred.
She swirled as Angelus returned, Fred bundled up in his arms. The girl was still alive but scared to death. Wow, was that enticing. Cordelia stopped in front of Angelus. “Thank you.” She kissed him and then looked at the young woman. “Surprised aren’t you. Don’t worry, the surprises don’t end here.” Cordelia took the stake from behind her back and shoved into Angelus chest. She stepped back as the dust settled.
“Fred,” Cordelia spoke, her eyes remaining on the dust. “Run, go to your room and stay there, don’t under any circumstances let me in. I am really hungry right now. Go. Call Wesley, tell him to get his ass here immediately with a crossbow. Please, go, don’t talk, don’t ask, just run.”
“Cordy?”
“GO.” Cordelia flashed her demon face.
Fred didn’t take a second longer.
Cordelia moved around the dust pile, slumping to the ground, her fingers twirling in the remains. What had she just done?
Part 21
Wesley waited at the entrance for Gunn. One more second and he would go in. Fred said she was safe in her room, but Wesley couldn’t take that chance.
“Wes.”
Wesley nodded at his friend. They both walked in scanning the lobby finding it empty. The cautiously walked up to the first floor, going first to Fred’s room.
“Fred,” Wesley called out gently, praying to hear an answer.
“Oh thank god,” Fred ran to the door. “Cordy’s a vampire, Angel is dust, she did it, I saw her, then she told me to run in here and stay and call YOU,” she rambled to Wesley.
“Where is she?” Wesley swore silently that he would remain calm and focused.
“I think still in their room, I don’t know for sure. I stayed here. I think maybe I heard her go downstairs but I think she came back, I don’t know. Vampire’s are quiet and I just don’t know.” Fred blinked. “What happened?”
Wesley nodded and raised his crossbow and opened the door to Angel and Cordelia’s suite. “Cordy?”
“Over here, don’t come any closer, you did bring the cross bow.”
Wesley flicked on the light switch resisting the urge to shut it off again at the sight.
“Cordy, what?”
“What’s going on? What’s happening? What the fuck? What are you trying to ask, Wesley?”
Wesley moved in closer studying the girl slumped against the wall. Empty containers of Angel's pig blood littered the ground by her feet.
“Do you have your soul?”
“No. At least I’m pretty sure I don’t. It took five containers of this shit for me not to leave the hotel or beg Fred to let me in. I got sick. This stuff is gross. I’ve never tasted human but it smells so much better.”
“You didn’t leave and the turning process could create a blood lust that is so instinctual that you wouldn’t realize that you had a soul, but you didn’t leave, didn’t kill any one.”
“I killed Angel.” She laughed. “I don’t have a soul, Wesley, forget that semi good option out of all this shit. I’ve only memories and the feelings that accompany them, but those feelings are fading pretty fast now.”
Gunn clenched his jaw trying to ignore the sock to his gut as Cordelia admitted to being a vampire, just as he tried to ignore the sharp nails Fred pierced into his arms at Cordelia’s each acknowledgement.
“Will you tell us what happened?” Wesley move closer unsure about Cordelia’s demeanor. She said she was a vampire without a soul but she had said nothing to threaten anyone, her only kill had been Angel.
“Stay back, please.” She held out her hand. “I don’t know when it’s going to snap.”
“Snap?”
“The hunger is gone. Like I said I got sick.” She waved a hand at the empty containers. “But the smell, human, I really want it.” She looked up at Wesley. “You have to listen to me.”
Wesley took a step back and nodded.
Cordelia licked her lips and returned a nod. “It wasn’t Angel that returned through the portal.” She held up her hand. “Don’t interrupt me I need to finish this while I still want to.”
Wesley shut his jaw and nodded.
“I told you that something had gone wrong that you sent another Angel, Angel B, a vampire with a soul but with even more issues than ours to 1998 to fix what Angel and I had done. Well, that Angel decided to become our Angel. I didn’t realize it at first, just thought it was nerves or something. I went to you,” she glared at Wesley. “I told you that I thought something was wrong, but no, you said it was because Angel had faced two Angelus’ and another Angel. Well, you were wrong. It was because THIS,” She slapped at the dust on the floor,” Killed Angel and came back in his place. The idiot, while wanting our Angel’s future forgot that his soul wasn’t bound and viola.” She waved her hand in front of her dead body.
Wesley refused to react or beat himself up. He would be sure to do that later. “You killed him?”
“He killed Angel.”
“Are you sure you don’t have a soul?”
“Wesley, it isn’t a matter of a soul, Angel, our Angel, is MY Angel, that wasn’t him.” She waved her hand at the dust. “It wasn’t Angel or the Angelus I would accept. He killed Angel.”
“Okay.” Wesley nodded. “What…”
“Wesley, Geez, use that brain of yours. You have to go back a fix it. Make sure that Angel B doesn’t kill Angel. He has to go though, because he did stop the other fuck up.”
“The other…what?”
“You sent Angel B back because Angel and I had sex as soon as he got there, he was going to mark me again. He wanted the younger body. Though, why he couldn’t have been happy with the older body is beyond me, you saw me, is that body really any better than this,” she jerked to her form.
Wesley gulped. “You were and are beautiful, I would venture my opinion that even more so now, or well, a day ago a least when you were alive.”
Cordelia laughed. “Thanks, I think. Anyway, I was pretty disappointed that we got interrupted. Angel B showed up. Watching, all of them watching, Angelus 1, 2, Angel B, it was a freakin porn movie, should’ve made popcorn for the degenerates.”
“Um, Cordy?”
“Right, you’re blushing. Don’t do that, it brings the blood to surface. I can almost taste it. I could just decide to eat you or maybe turn you. I love you. You’re family. Maybe you kiss better as a vampire.”
Wesley jerked his cross bow up. “You were saying something other than that.”
“You don’t love me?”
Wesley bowed his head. “I love the non-vampire Cordy.”
“That’s not fair. I didn’t ask to be a vampire.”
“No, you didn’t. And you are being very nice by telling us this and not killing us.”
“I am aren’t I?”
“Yes.”
“It’s kind of weird, but I still remember everything, the feelings and everything.”
“Yes, I’ve read that some vampires retain their humanity longer than others, you clearly have.”
“Oh, are you sure you don’t want to be a vampire, think of how smart you’d be, and all the books you could read over the many years. It could be fun.”
“No, Cordy.”
“Hmmph. I’m getting hungry again.” She scrunched up her face at Wesley. “You have to go back. I can’t go. I want too, really. But, I’m pretty sure that I would go straight for my soul and destroy it and probably try to kill Buffy at the same time. See, that’s where I was. Angel and Angel B shoved me into Buffy’s house, while they were supposed to fix everything. He said I’d be safe. Am I safe? I told him I didn’t want to go.” Cordelia looked to the ground. “You have to go Wesley, you have to save Angel.”
Wesley nodded. “I will.”
“Promise.”
“Yes.”
“Okay,” Cordelia took another deep breath. “I still love you all but you better do it now, Wesley.”
“Cordy.”
“I’m a soulless vampire, Wesley. You are my family. It’s not safe. Do it.”
“I love you, Cordy.” Wesley shot his crossbow.
“Oh shit,” Gunn jerked.
Fred ran to the dust. “No. Oh god, no.”
Wesley turned his back to his friends. “Fred, a portal, now. When Angel was sent.”
Fred blinked up through her tears. “Right.”
“Fuck.” Gunn shook his head. “English, you can’t go alone.” He ran after Wesley.
***
Fred and Gunn sat across Wesley’s desk. The young brunette held the wafer in her hand. “I almost don’t want to know if we mess up again.”
“He’s going with out me.”
“Charles, we have to stay together in case something else goes wrong.”
Gunn grunted. “Let’s hope this works.” He swallowed the thin wafer.
Fred nodded as she did the same.
Part 22
Wesley flattened his tall frame against the surface his body blending into the wooden fence and concentrated on the house across the street. He wouldn’t think about his beautiful friend lying in a pile of dust on bedroom floor or his part on how it happened. It could be fixed. Do this and Cordelia will never have experienced any of the horror. His lovely friend and Angel would be back where they belonged. He watched and waited outside Buffy’s house for the Angels and Cordelia to show up.
Wesley moved back even further into the darkness as he saw the vampires and the girl. Wesley was grateful that Cordelia was with them. Had she not been, he would’ve never known which Angel was which. They were identical in every way except in clothing, but even that was similar both wore leather jackets and dark pants, their shirts being the only thing of any real difference. But, Wesley had no doubt which vampire was his friend.
There was no mistaking the vampire that was engaged in a whispered futile argument with the young woman. The vampire rubbed furiously at his temple while his other hand kept a protective hold on Cordelia, his body between hers and the other Angel. It was a common enough scene, the contest of their wills coupled with obvious love.
Wesley stayed still has Angel pushed the young woman towards Buffy’s house. When the vampires had left he followed hoping that the Angels would keep their speed at a human rate. He couldn’t lose them but he couldn’t interfere, not until the Angeluses were dealt with. Cordelia had said that the Angeluses had been taken care of, he couldn’t take the chance that his presence would mess that up -too much had already gone wrong.
Wesley paused, holding back, puzzled that the vampires were heading into Sunnydale High School. He understood as soon as they reappeared. Angel B was carrying a rifle. He nodded and began to follow again.
***
Wesley shook his head at the sight before him. Two vampires, looking exactly like his friend brutally fighting, while two others stood and peppered them with tranquilizer darts. He moved closer as the Angeluses crumbled, raising his crossbow as soon as the threat of the soulless vampires was contained and he was free to shoot. With frustration, Wesley tried to find a shot but the vampires weren’t cooperating with his silence curses and instructions. He knew from earlier the differences between the vampires’ shirts, but both broad leathered-coated backs looked the same.
Wesley lowered his weapon as both vampires each swung an unconscious burden over their shoulder, deciding to follow and wait a little longer for a better opportunity.
***
Wesley debated whether to get any closer to the apartment. There was some validity to the plan of surprising Angel B, shooting first and explaining later. But sneaking up on a vampire was problematic. Wesley moved closer making his decision. Hopefully, the vampires would be preoccupied with the Angeluses and the spell. He couldn‘t keep standing on the street not knowing when Angel B would decide to betray Angel.
Wesley opened the door. The scene before him unfolded in slow motion. Angel turning is back to the closing portal, speaking. Angel B, answering raising the rifle. Wesley jerked out his weapon calling to Angel. Both Angel’s turned, one in surprise then other with his rifle raised. Wesley flinched as the dart knocked him back, his crossbow falling to the floor.
Angel’s exclamation was cut off as he felt the twinge of a prick enter his shoulder. He lurched away from the vampire grabbing for Wesley’s disregarded crossbow. The arrow left the weapon as another dart pierced his chest. Angel’s last sight before losing consciousness was his attacker still standing, the arrow embedded in his chest, but not his heart. His last thought was fuck. His last feeling was fear for Cordelia.
Angel B winced yanking at the bolt and stripping off his bloody shirt. He had wanted to explain- to tell Angel that Cordelia would always be safe, reassuring the vampire before he died but there wasn’t much point to it now. He looked down at Wesley’s slumped form. Angel B didn’t want to kill the human. Wesley was supposed to be his friend. It wasn’t too late. Just do the spell go back to his time. The drugs would where off both the vampire and the human soon enough. They would be fine and go together to get Cordelia. They would wonder about his actions, but they ultimately wouldn’t care because they were alive and Cordelia safe. It could work.
Angel B looked back to the fallen vampire with a soul. That vampire would go back, would touch Cordelia, would love her be loved by her. Never Angel B, because he would cease to exist, he would never touch or hold Cordy in love. No. Angel B buried any guilt for what he was about to do. It would be worth it. Angel B reached down grabbing Wesley’s neck and twisted. It was okay. Wesley hadn’t felt the pain of death and neither would the vampire.
Part 23
Fred yelled louder than needed. Gunn poked his head up from the basement, looking to where the young woman was pointing.
He ran to the opening in the atmosphere. He waited expectantly as the chasm got larger. He glanced at Fred.
Fred crossed her fingers.
A vampire clad in leather jumped through. Gunn moved closer. “Angel?”
“Yeah, and more importantly,” he held up a glowing globe. “Cordy.”
“Wesley?” Fred asked looking behind the vampire into the portal that was closing.
Angel jerked to the young woman. “Um…he…”
“Not what we wanted to hear.” Gunn shot his darts.
The vampire fell. The globe in his hands shattered against the floor, the light fleeing from the confines traveling upwards towards the stairs.
“Damn.” Gunn shouted. “I’ll take care of the vamp, you go.”
Fred was already running for the stairs.
***
Cordy shot up on the bed. She was home. She scrunched her brow as Fred burst through the door.
“Cordy,” the young woman flung herself onto the bed taking Cordelia in a huge hug.
“Fred?” Cordelia pushed at the young woman noticing her tears. “Fred, what happened?” Cordelia looked around. “Where’s Angel?”
“It was so awful.” Fred hugged Cordelia again.
“Fred?”
“It’s still awful, I think.” She squeezed, mumbling into Cordy’s shoulder.
Cordelia gave in and let the woman hold her tight. After a moment, Cordelia moved her arms off her. “Fred? Where’s Angel?”
Fred shook her head, tears flowing freely.
“Fred, speak, please.” Cordelia said tightly, the ache that she had felt in Buffy’s house intensified. “He’s fine,” Cordelia denying the inexplicable twisting of her heart. “He said so, he did the spell to get us home. Everything was fine.” She insisted over the feeling of loss and wrongness.
Fred shook her head.
“Damn’t Fred, talk to me.” Cordelia yelled.
Fred gulped and nodded. “Um…Okay….I don’t know where to start,” she sniffled wiping at her face.
“Start with where is Angel.” Cordelia demanded.
“We’re not sure. Okay, that’s not going to work. What do you remember?”
“What? What do you mean you’re not ….” Cordelia attempted to rise from the bed.
“Please, Cordy,” Fred begged, her hands still covering the other woman’s pulling her down.
Cordelia took a deep breath. “I was at my parent’s house. Angel showed up, then the another Angel, Angel B, Wesley sent him because something went wrong, we fixed it, Angel and Angel B went to send Angelus 1 back and make sure Angelus 2 didn’t cause trouble. I was at Buffy’s. I felt something, it wasn’t a vision but it was real, something happened to Angel, so I left Buffy’s but Angel found me, he was alright, we came home.”
Fred nodded, really happy that Cordelia had labeled all the Angels, the chart was already taking shape in her head. “Okay, we don’t remember sending Angel B, don’t know him. But, since we did, it was because Wesley’s potion must have enabled us to realize that something had gone wrong. Anyway, we - Wesley, Gunn, and I, were waiting for Angel to come through the portal with your soul in the orb. It had been about an hour when it happened. Your soul safe in the orb and who we thought was Angel…did you just call him Angel.”
“Uh, oh. … He’s Angel A.”
“Makes perfect sense.” Fred nodded approvingly. “We thought it was Angel A, but it wasn’t.”
“Not Angel,” Cordelia shook her head. “It was. He was wearing…” she puzzled, remembering the shock of the ache, the feeling that was still present. “What happened?”
“We thought everything was fine, so did you sort of. You did express some concerns to Wesley but I didn’t know that until later. Anyway, that night after Wesley and Gunn had left, Angel, the alleged A, came into my room and carried me into your room, we’re going to have to call him Angelus B or Angelus 3, I’ll have to think about that.”
“Angelus.” Cordelia whispered. “No…no.”
“Shush, you were there, a vampire. You staked Angelus B3,” Fred nodded at her compromise.” and told me to go hide in my room and call Wesley. “You, Cordelia...” Fred puzzled,” Cordy the vamp, told us what had happened. Angel B killed Angel A and took his place, but he forgot his soul wasn’t bound.” Fred looked up. “That was really an important thing to forget, how do you forget something like that.” She shrugged. “Anyway…you, Cordelia must have had sex with Angel B, thinking he was Angel A,” Fred scrunched up her brow. “That would’ve had to been the reason right? Right.” Fred answered her own question not noticing the blood disappear from Cordelia’s expression or the panic in her eyes.
“Then Angelus B3 and then Cordy the vamp. You didn’t have your soul, that’s what you said, but you were being nice except for killing Angelus B3, but actually that was a good thing, so it wasn’t bad. Cordy the Vamp told Wesley he had to go back and make sure that Angel B didn’t kill Angel A and that he had to kill her, you, Cordy the Vamp. That it wasn’t safe to let you live. Wesley killed you and left. Gunn and I took the wafers to protect our memories from any change in the time line and Angel, we don’t have a clue if its A or B, came through the portal with the orb and your soul but no Wesley. Wesley’s gone. He’s not here. We don’t know where he is. He could be dead, we don’t know. Angel, whichever, is tranquilized.”
Cordelia stared. Cordelia didn’t know which was scarier, Fred’s words or that Cordy understood everything she had said. The question was did she believe it. She knew she didn’t want to.
“I have to see him.”
“Cordy.”
“Fred, we need to know what happened to Wesley.”
“I agree. But you didn’t know for sure, until well, from what Cordy the vamp said until after having sex with Angel B by mistake, thinking it was Angel A, Cordy the Vamp didn’t actually say that, but it's the only thing that makes sense and you, Cordy the Vamp I mean, seemed pretty mad at Angel B and you, she, did kill Angelus B3.”
Cordelia rubbed at her face, trying to find words and not screams. “Fred, I said talk, not sex.”
Fred nodded. “Right, of course.”
Part 24
Gunn came out of one of the spare rooms, stopping when he saw Fred and Cordy.
“Hey,” he grunted a smile pulling Cordelia into a hug.
“Hey,” Cordelia hugged the black man back. “I need to see him.”
“I…”
“Somebody’s got to figure this out and fix it. You don’t know for sure which Angel is in there.”
“Girl, you messed up once and that was a big one.” Gunn warned.
Cordelia squeezed her fist, digging her fingernails into her palms, fighting the desire to scream, cry and kill. “I’ve heard. But…” She looked back up to Gunn his expression solid in his resolve. “Call Lorne.”
Gunn nodded. “Cordy,”
She paused at the door.
“We’re not going with your ‘gut’ or the vamp’s attire. We’re trusting you not to do anything until Lorne verifies which vampire is in there.”
Cordelia lowered her head in a slow nod.
“Charles, that was mean. Nobody realized it. “ Fred glared. “ And she was right before when you and Wesley couldn’t tell the difference between Angel and Angelus 1.”
“Slept with the wrong vamp,” Gunn reaffirmed his position.
“She told Wesley her doubts, he rationalized them away.”
“Girl, I’ll bet money that Cordy’s ‘gut’ will be right, but I ain’t betting her life, yours, mine or Wes’ on it. Now she knows.”
Part 25
Cordelia walked around the unconscious vampire. Gunn was wrong. She could tell. She plucked at her father’s sweater. He stripped Angel and then killed him. Bastard. Cordelia now knew what the pain that pounded through her at Buffy’s signaled, what the continuing ache was. It was obvious she had felt Angel die. She no longer was under the illusion that Angel B with his broody soul wouldn’t be capable of such treachery. She believed Fred. She couldn’t ignore the dread flowing inside, the one she denied because there had been a vampire before her with Angel’s face and her dad’s sweater. God, what a dangerous fool she had been. And Wesley was dead because of it.
Cordelia glanced around the room. The nightstand had four quite lovely stakes for the making.
She shook her head. Cordelia had promised Gunn. She wouldn’t act until Lorne read the vampire. Still she had to hear the justifications of a vampire with a soul that could kill Angel.
“Wakey, wakey,” Cordelia slapped at the vampire’s face.
He growled, jerking at the chains. He blinked. “Cordelia?”
“Yep. You’re in the Hyperion. I’m home. Back to myself.” She twirled to the vampire, showing him her present body.
“Why?” He tugged at the chains again.
“Gunn,” she sat on the edge of the bed. “He's a bit doubtful about your identity right now. You know how he is about Angelus and for that matter about you.”
“He doesn’t trust me.”
“That little problem you had with going evil all of a sudden still gets him spooked. And we did just come back from a place that was sporting two evil guys and a strange Angel. You can’t really blame him.”
“Tell him I’m not Angelus. You know.” Angel said. “You know it’s me, right.” He pleaded.
Cordelia’s eyes drifted back to the nightstand. It would be so easy. She took a deep breath. “I know you have a soul.” She smiled. “But, my say isn’t enough. Gunn isn’t impressed with my clothing arguments. He just doesn’t trust you and I can’t blame him. After all, all I can say is that you have a soul. I can’t tell him which Angel you are.”
“Cordy, it’s me.” The vampire’s rose in panic.
Cordelia cocked her head, pointing at the sweater. “My father’s. So, it has to be. Unless, Angel B changed shirts with my Angel before killing him, but how could that happen. Angel B has a soul. He wouldn’t betray his soul like that. Would he? Could he?” Cordy shrugged, looking at vampire. “Lorne will read you and then we all will know the truth.” She got up from the bed.
“I have my soul. I AM Angel. Cordy, let me up. I love you, let me touch you, please.”
Cordelia raised her brows. “Sorry. You know I can’t go against Gunn on this. I’m surprised that you would expect me too. Lorne will be here in a flash, Gunn will apologize, and you will say you understand. You do right, you should.”
“I…” Angel stared at the young woman’s frank stare.
He nodded.
Cordelia beamed and sat back on the bed. “I’ll keep you company and you can tell me what happened to Wesley.”
“Wesley.” Angel hesitated.
“Yeah. He’s missing. He followed us, or actually followed Angel B as a back up plan. But, I didn’t see him in 1998 and well, Gunn and Fred are pretty damn positive that they sent him and he’s not here. So, where is he? Do you know? You must have seen him, after all, if you’re here that means he stopped Angel B from killing you. So, what happened?”
“I…”
Cordelia interrupted him. “Was it Angelus? Did he kill him? I could understand that- Angelus is a soulless vampire. Evil, capable of anything and everything, whoa, killing you, me, Wesley, no surprise but Angel with a soul doing horrendous acts, I don’t know. I’ve always had a hard time getting that because with it he’s such a good man, with the biggest heart of anybody I know. Yet, I do know he’s capable of cutting off his humanity, living in the dark, cutting off his friends and family. That Angel has always been scarier than Angelus, too many layers to be a cardboard villain.”
“Why are you talking about me in the third person.”
“Am I? Oh. Well. As I was saying even knowing what I know about Angel and his capability of being cold and dangerous, I never ever would imagine him killing Wesley or allowing Wesley, an innocent- not an evil lawyer, mind you, but an innocent- to be killed. To reject his soul to such an extent would be an act that couldn’t be forgiven, never understood. So, what happened?
Angel blinked at the chill flowing off the young woman. “Angelus.”
Cordelia nodded. “So, he told you before Angelus, which one by the way? Angelus 2 wouldn’t even know that he was a threat, hadn’t met Wesley yet, so was it Angelus 1. He could’ve remembered that Wesley was with Angel when they saved me in 1898, he could’ve remembered that Wesley and Gunn shot him down like a dog when he came to the future and did the spell that threw him back. I guess. Was it Angelus 1?”
Angel slowly nodded.
“So, Wesley told you that Angel B was going to kill you, that Angel B being evil as well as stupid forgot his soul wasn’t bound, had sex with me, became Angelus B3, and turned me into Cordy the vamp? And then Angelus 1 killed Wesley? And you let him? That’s so unlike you.”
“You weren’t a vampire. You aren’t.”
“No, but lets say that this all happened before. That Wesley, Gunn, and Fred realized what happened before Angelus B could kill them. So, Wesley being Wesley goes back. Only he hasn’t returned.
“Cordy.” Angel mind was spinning. Was the young woman speaking the truth? Had he really forgotten that? Had he let Angelus touch her once again? Oh god. “Cordy.”
“Angel. Why haven’t you asked why Angel B would want you dead?
Angel winced as her glittering glare and cold voice brought the truth to him. “I…Cordy, I…”
“Don’t, I don’t care. I thought I did but I don’t. All, I care about is that you killed Angel and most likely killed Wesley too when he tried to stop you. I promised Gunn that I wouldn’t act until Lorne arrived. But as soon as he gold stars your warped fucked up soul, you’re dust. I don’t settle. There is only one vampire I want and you aren’t him. But, don’t worry I’ll get him back. Time is a funny thing, you can fix you’re mistakes. You have his beautiful face, but that’s all you got.” She moved to the door.
“Cordelia, I have a soul. I love you.”
“There is no version of me that gives a damn.” She slammed the door.
Part 26
“Cordy?”
“What are we supposed to do with him?” Cordelia paced. “We can’t send him to his time, this is his time. Kill him. I’d like too, but what would that do? But we got to do something.”
“So, you agree with Lorne.” Gunn pointed to the green demon.
Lorne coughed. “Actually, I’d say that I agree with the Princess, she called it before I even got here. That’s not one happy vamp in there. Even before all this playing patty cakes with the time line. He’s present wasn’t a happy place. Dark, alone, sad.”
Cordelia swirled. “Don’t even try to make me feel sorry for him.”
“I wasn’t princess, it just what it was. He has the soul, the desire to be what he could be, he just doesn’t have the patience or the know how to get there. He could learn, though. He’s has the soul.”
“You keep saying that has if it means anything to me.” Cordelia flashed her eyes at demon.
“Princess, the Angel cakes that you love is gone, but this one is a champion, he can be taught and he does love you.”
“He killed my ‘Angel Cakes’ and Wesley is dead. I’m not teaching him how to tie his fucking shoes.”
“I’m with Cordy.” Gunn nodded.
Fred cleared her throat. “We have to do the spell again, fix it.”
“Kitten, honeys, friends, sweeties, from what you’ve been telling me you’ve been playing a spectacular game of twister with the time line, making it worse as the game progresses. It could be time to cut your losses and carry your chips home. We have Cordelia and a vampire with a soul, who for all extensive purposes is Angel. Or will be with some good old family loving and understanding.”
Lorne flinched back at the trio of glares. “Or not. Don’t kill me, just voicing another option other than playing Russian roulette with more futures. So, what is the plan?”
“I’ll go.” Gunn nodded. “Do the spell that we used with English, with any luck, I’ll get there at the same time. The two of us….”
“No.” Cordelia interrupted.
“Girl, you ain’t going. You’re the focus of all of this. We ain’t giving two Angeluses and a crazy Angel another Cordy to focus on. I’ll chain YOU up before that happens.”
Fred cleared her throat again, looking apoplectically at Cordelia. “I’d help him. Sorry. You can’t go. For one thing, you’re already are there. Not the body but the soul. It…I don’t know…you shouldn’t. It’s too dangerous. I’ll go with Charles.”
“Fred, you can’t go.”
“I can.” Her eyes sparkled in indignation through her glasses. “I can use a crossbow, I can be there as back up.”
Cordelia slumped her shoulders. “We need Angel and Wesley.”
“Girl, we don’t have them that is why were in this shithole.”
“Let’s go get them.” Cordelia said.
“That’s what we’re not agreeing on.”
“No, let’s go.” Cordelia waved her hand in the air,” a year from now. Let’s go get our Wesley with his brains, and the Angel that we trust. Just before all this time traveling stuff started to happen.”
Gunn and Fred looked to each other and started nodding slowly. “Fred, could you do another spell.”
“Yeah, it’s just plugging in the numbers now. Still, some leeways with exactness but, yeah, give me a date.”
Cordelia looked to Gunn, her face scrunched. “I don’t know, the parameters should be definitely LA -Angel and Wesley here working together - so at least 1999. No, make it at least 2000.”
“Hell, make it four months ago.” Gunn suggested.
“Good,” Cordelia nodded.
“I don’t know if I can. Not like that. The spells have always had a cushion between the time departed and that to go to. It’s like a built in warning system that too close is too dangerous. No, jumping back to yesterday. We know that we could send from here to 1998, I wouldn’t suggest going much before that. Wesley did know, I think he did, I mean, when he sent he and Gunn back to warn Angel, it couldn’t have been that far in the future, but I don’t remember if he put in precautions. He gets all of the time cause and effect dynamics. I only get the math. But, I would say close to 1998 but with Angel and Wesley in LA, but not yesterday.”
“Four months ain't yesterday,” Gunn grumbled.
Cordelia scrunched up her head. “No earlier than 2000, better yet, 2001. By then, Wesley had gone from clumsy rouge demon hunter to awesome brain guy, with the ability to remain on his feet as he killed nasties and Gunn was working here too. Sorry Fred.”
“That’s okay, any specific…”
“Pick one.” Cordelia shrugged. “As long as we can get an Angel we trust and a Wesley that will know what the hell we need to do.”
Part 27
Gunn jumped first, Fred and Cordelia followed soon after all rolling on the floor catching their breaths as they stood. They had all agreed to go together or rather they all disagreed about who would go alone. Lorne agreed to stand watch over the bound Angel B.
Gunn grunted looking around, his expectant expression turned to a scowl as he turned to the slight brunette that was brushing off her jeans. “You were supposed to put us in the past, but not the friggin far past.
“I didn’t.” Fred pushed at her glasses.
“This,” Gunn wiped his hand over the dusty counter, looking at the dark and dank surroundings. “Isn’t…”
“Gunn,” Cordelia called. “We screwed up.”
Fred stood arms crossed. “I know I did the spell right, exactly in the parameters you gave me.”
Cordelia gave a soft smile. “It’s not your fault Fred. Gunn and I forgot.”
“Girl.”
She swished at the dust and debris on her abandoned desk. “We forgot that there was a vampire with a soul in our past that we didn’t trust.” She held a chipped coffee mug that had once held pencils and pens. “We’ve been fired.”
“Fuck.” Gunn rubbed at his baldhead. “Will he even listen to us?”
“My guess is a big fat no.” Cordelia leaned her head back. “We need to get to Wesley.”
“I told you to get out of here.” Angel’s deep voice, brittle in its starkness, echoed into the lobby from the direction of the basement.
Fred squealed and jumped at the voice ready to go towards the vampire, but was held back by Gunn’s strong hand. “That ain’t an Angel you want to know.”
“Uh.”
“Post Darla mind fuck, pre Darla fuck, useless to us.”
Fred slapped Gunn’s arm. “I told you…”
“Sorry, but that doesn’t change the fact this version is a worthless bastard.”
Cordelia sighed. “Gunn.”
“Girl, you know it better than I.”
“Just be quiet.”
Angel stood his eyes narrowing at Gunn’s words and protective action towards the unknown female. He looked towards Cordelia. He had been surprised to sense her in the lobby. Hell he hadn’t believed it at first. Angel had stopped himself from running up the stairs, forcing down the relief and hope that had sprung up. She had been so indifferent, biting, and cold when he had seen her in the hospital. She had said in loud clear terms that his family didn’t want or need him. She had cut him off completely. After all turn about was fair play.
Going to the hospital had been a weakness just as the unfettered hope that he hogtied and shoved back down was when he had sensed her. Emotions, the feelings that Cordelia, his family allowed him made him too weak to face Darla, Drusilla and destroy Wolfram & Hart. He couldn’t allow that. He needed to get Cordelia out of the hotel, out of his life. She was his biggest weakness.
He looked down at the woman that faced him. “This is my hotel. You are trespassing. You don’t belong here. I don’t want you here. You agreed.”
“I did?” Cordelia stepped back. “When did I say okay, Angel act like an asshole, go bury yourself in your obsession with Darla and Wolfram & Hart, forget your soul, our mission, leave me. Did I, really?” Cordelia thought back, shaking her head. “Gunn?”
The black man shrugged his shoulders. “You might’ve been a bit verbal in your venting good riddance to the vamp. Hell, we all were."
“But that was to you and Wesley, when did I tell him?” She pointed over her shoulder to Angel.”
Gunn shrugged. “I heard you yell about the evil-ex bitch a couple of months ago and Angel whimpering. I was a little bummed. You almost got us the boat.”
Fred raised her hand. “I heard it too.”
Cordelia rolled her eyes. “That was just,” she waved her hand in the air, blowing it off. “Not then, but now, is what I’m talking about. Hmmph.” She turned to the vampire. “What did I say?”
Angel narrowed his eyes, wondering at Cordelia’s new tactic to get to him and why she was doing it. The woman he saw in the hospital would never want to be there.
“I believe you told me, that you didn’t need me, that none of you needed me before you told me too leave. Now I’m telling you, all of you, to leave my hotel,” his eyes as cold and mechanical as his voice.
“Fuck.” Cordelia turned again to Gunn. “We really screwed up.”
Angel blinked. Cordelia didn’t curse not like that. Her expressions of damnation were more imaginative than common profanity. That wasn’t the reaction he expected but he didn’t expect any of what was happening.
“Cordy?” Gunn asked.
“Wesley,” she turned back to the vampire. “How long ago? Is Wesley still in the hospital?”
“Aw, shit.” Gunn rubbed he head furiously.
Fred’s eyes widened. “Was he blown up or shot? Wait, the blown up bit happened before the what’s her name bit.” Fred’s eyes blinked rapidly towards the vampire. “Where’s Wesley? We have to go to him.”
Cordelia shook her head. “Fred, you can’t go. We can’t even go. Maybe…” She faced the vampire again. “Is he still in the hospital or is he home?”
Angel stared. “Hospital.”
Cordelia closed her eyes.
“Cordy, we have to go.” Fred urged.
She nodded. “Yes, but not to the hospital. Gunn and I are already there. Wesley can’t help us. But we do have to go.” She went to her desk. “Damn’t.” she brushed at the papers and trash that no longer meant anything. She went straight into the enclosed office. “Angel.” She yelled.
Angel almost refused to move but the whole thing was becoming so surreal that maybe he was dreaming and in his dreams he could be in the same room with Cordelia for a short time at least, before he woke up in an impossible sweat and more determination to push her out of his being.
“What did you do…. nevermind, the desk calendar was Wesley’s.” She slumped down in the chair, her hands covering her face. “I don’t know what to do.”
Angel had to ignore the tremor in her voice otherwise he would be drawn from his course. She had to go. “I want you to leave. Don’t make me do it the hard way.”
Cordelia looked up all signs of distress gone in the dangerous glint of her narrowed eyes. “The hard way? Would be that be using force? Glad to see that it would still be “hard,”” she quoted in the air,” to pick me up and throw me out on my ass. But before you get all ‘hardy’,” she quoted again, "give me a minute before I 'make' you be even more beigey and unbearable. If my presence bothers you so much go to the sewers, go stalk out where the dangerous duo are, go stare at Wolfram & Hart and try to figure out how to destroy it, or at least go back to the basement and turn yourself into more of the vamp terminator. I’ll leave, don’t worry, I just need to think for a minute so go into your deep silent brood cold mode and shut up.” She glared for a moment and then yelled for Gunn.
“Yeah,” the black man was in the room in an instant with Fred following close behind. “Is the vamp giving you trouble.”
“Don’t worry about him, I lived through it once, I can stand five minutes of the asshole. We need to figure out what to do. We can’t bother Wesley. He has…we just can’t and I don’t see recruiting the past you or me. It would’ve taken an apocalypse to get me to leave Wesley and our crazy problem just won’t cut it-too much other crap going on in this time frame and not much sympathy for Angel.”
“What about Angel, I mean him,” Fred nodded to the vampire at the door.
“Yeah, right.” Gunn rolled his eyes as Cordelia Pfft loudly.
“What, he is Angel, he has soul, he…”
“Girl, so did the other one and he killed Wesley.”
Fred bit her lips. “Cordy said Angel B said Angelus did it.”
“Do you remember her saying that she believed him? I don't."
“Cordy,” Fred looked to the young woman behind the desk.
Cordelia took a deep breath. “It doesn’t make sense otherwise Fred, Angel did send Angelus 1 back or no Angels with souls. The other Angelus, well, maybe, but he was the least threat because he didn’t know who Wesley was yet or what he would mean to Angel or to me. It doesn’t matter. All that matters is that we stop it. We won’t do it from here. We’re going home and then I’ll go.”
“Cordy.” Gunn shook his head. “You ain’t going anywhere near the Angeluses or Angel B.”
“I’m already there, so what.”
“No,” Fred ran up. “Maybe if Wesley said you could but otherwise, no.”
“I have to. This is my fault. Two times I was faced with him and I… No, I’ll go. I’ll stop it.”
“And if you don’t.”
“Will it really be any worse? Angel is already dead. If I fail, so what, at least I won’t be here alone.”
“Cordy, you aren’t alone, we’re here. We love you.”
“Girl, you aren’t going on a suicide mission, not without us.” Gunn said forcibly.
Angel moved from out of the shadows. He had wanted to believe that this was some elaborate scheme of Cordelia’s to get him to listen to her. But, that reassurance was leaving rapidly as the name Angelus was thrown around too easily and she hadn’t even looked at him since she told him to get lost and either had Gunn or the unknown young woman.
“What suicide mission.”
Cordelia blinked up. “Oh, the wall speaks. Go away. I told you we would be leaving soon, in fact, we might as well leave now. At least at home, we have some semblance of cleanliness.”
“Why are you here?” Angel asked no longer believing that her presence had anything to do with him rehiring them and everything to do with the bizarre notion that she wasn't even the young woman that he had so recently seen standing guard over Wesley’s hospital room.
“It was a mistake. We forgot. How I don’t know, but we did. And you don’t care so why waste your time.”
“I want to know why you and Gunn are here, why she’s here,” he pointed to Fred, “Why you didn’t know that Wesley is in the hospital, why you think he’s dead, why you think I’m dead, I want to know what Angelus has to do with any of this.”
“And if I don’t tell you then what? You’re going to fire me, cut me out of your life? Ooh, are you going to threaten me? Did it, done it and Pfft to you.” Cordelia glared.
Fred stared at Gunn. The black man was also glaring at Angel. And the vampire was standing there taking it in and giving his own cold glare in return. Shivers ran up her spine. She ran to Cordelia, pulling at her arm. “Cordy, this is Angel. Not a version that you don’t know, one that you can’t trust, one that you can’t love. He is Angel. I’ve read the files. This is Angel just before his epiphany. He can help, you have to remember that, both of you.” Her intense stare and words encompassing Gunn also.
“He doesn’t care.” Cordelia shook her head. Gunn nodded in agreement.
“Cordy,” Fred held the other woman’s face. “You don’t believe that, you couldn’t have, you never would’ve still loved him if you’d truly believed that. And Charles, you do trust Angel and so does Wesley. If you couldn’t forgive, understand and believe then you never would’ve saved me and become my family. Stop thinking in the past and how he hurt you. We can if we have to search for another version, but Wesley never liked us sending Angel back.”
“He did quick enough, he went quick enough.” Gunn shook his head.
“Yes, but only because he had too. We talked about it when devising the different spells. He was always concerned. Wesley just couldn’t allow the changes to remain. It was simply emotion over logic and reason. None of us are completely sure of all of that happened. But, I do know that Wesley warned against using the Portal too many times without a justifiable reason because each time there was the risk that something would change making things even worse. And he was right- it is worse. Wesley did,” looking to Cordelia and Gunn. “Cordy, we did talk about it, right after it happened the first time, Charles you were there.”
The black man slowly nodded.
“Talked about what?” Cordy glanced at her two friends.
Fred took a deep breath. “When you came back from 1898, after we knew what you went through. Wesley debated going back again at a time before he and Angel went- in an attempt to stop Angelus from ever seeing you. But he decided that we knew the outcome of the first trip, you were safe and even though things changed slightly, they were inconsequential to the risk."
"Inconsequential, my ass.” Gunn snorted.
Cordelia glared at Gunn and then narrowed her eyes at Fred. “Where were Angel and I in this little group office meeting?”
“Indisposed for a good three days, making things more ‘inconsequential’.” Gunn shot back.
“What is your problem?” Cordelia asked harshly.
“My problem? Damn’t girl. Between Wolfram & Hart, multiple Angeluses and Angels all who seem to have the need to make your pretty ass into a vampire or a piece of property as gotten Wesley killed.” Gunn yanked at the shirt Cordelia was wearing. “These damn things that you wear so proudly will be the death of us all.”
“Charles,” Fred yanked at the black man. “Stop it. Wesley understood.”
“He didn’t, he just let it be.”
Cordelia stood straight. “So what do you want to do, Gunn? What Lorne suggested. Let that vampire take Angel’s place.”
“Like that will happen, you’ll kill him as soon as we let him loose.”
“He deserves to die. I can’t believe that you think otherwise. He killed Wesley and Angel.”
“Right now, I’m half in to forgetting all of them - Angels and Angeluses. Even with his soul bound, we get the evil fucker showing up on our doorstep. If it wasn’t for Wes, I’d say let them all die. That would stop Wolfram & Hart. No vampire with a soul, no whacked out schemes every five minutes.”
Cordelia’s voice got cold. “Gunn, Angelus doesn’t even know who you are. Wolfram & Hart could care less about you. You have no say in this. None of you do. It’s my decision.”
“Your decisions have gotten Wesley killed and Fred offered up as your after sex breakfast and that is MY business. But, then again, it’s all about Angel for you isn’t it.”
Cordelia reared back and slugged the black man, her fist carrying the force of her every feeling of anger, sadness, and guilt, dropping the strong man to his knees.
Cordelia blinked looking at what she had done. “Oh god.” She ran.
Angel stayed still, but his eyes followed the fleeing girl, targeting where her pounding heart was going. Satisfied for the moment he looked back to Gunn and to the young woman kneeling next to him.
“Charles, you shouldn’t have.”
“She hit me.”
“Charles, we all are hurting right now. But, Cordy had a point, a valid one. Not once during any of this did she have a choice. Wolfram & Hart threw her into the 19th century for Angelus to kill her. They sent him to the future to kill her when that failed. They sent her to Sunnydale to face two Angelus. This is about her, Angel, and their bond not us. Angel died because he had to go and save her. Wesley died because he chose to go after them. If we die, it will because we choose to put ourselves in the position to be in danger. She hasn’t asked us to go though, she wouldn’t. The only ones she will agree to send back is her or an Angel she can trust. She won’t risk anyone else. You saw that when she chose to kill Angelus and die rather than put us in danger.”
“She sent Wesley back.”
“She asked him to go because she had no choice, she couldn’t go. She didn’t have a soul. She told us that she was afraid that she would just destroy our Cordy and kill that Buffy girl. And Wesley would’ve gone anyway. He had just killed Cordy and Angel was dead. He would’ve gone whether Cordy the vamp asked or not. Just like you would’ve or I would’ve. Together, Charles, that is the only way we will survive this.”
Gunn pushed up from the ground. “You sound like Cordy.”
“I’ve been listening to her. She rubs off on people.”
“Damn straight, okay, so what I go and apologize.”
Fred looked around. She scrunched up her brow at the departing dark figure that separated from the wall. “This might not be a good time.”
“Nope. I guess we’ll be sitting here for awhile.” Gunn jerked up. “Shit, what if he forgets that he doesn’t the have sex free card.”
“I don’t think we have to worry about that. They didn’t seem to like each other very much.” Fred sat on the chair nervous and sad at the tension between her friends, even if Angel was from the past and didn’t know her he still was her friend.
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