Title: A Little Ways Back
Author: anne
Posted: 04-05-2003
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Rating: NC-17
Category: Time travel, adventure, romance (I hope)
Content: The one you have to think about and root for is C/A.
Summary: Sequel to Into the Past and Now to the Present. If you haven’t read Into the Past or Now to the Present, then you should. I posted them at ST but it was before the wonder of Nothing Fancy so you will need to go to: http://www.1freespace.com/temptatio...s/caindex.html. If you don't want to do that, see the Story So Far notes below.
Spoilers: I'm not really sure but Cordy isn't a demon, so none of that other icky stuff that followed...major change in the ATS universe...Cordy's visions aren't deadly, just were really painful but Wesley fixed that....purist leave me alone...
Disclaimer: The characters in the Angelverse were created by Joss Whedon & David Greenwalt. No infringement is intended, no profit is made. Movies mentioned- ‘Back to the Future’- Universal Studios, Robert Zemeckis; ‘Frequency’- New Line Studios- (summary- as it wasn’t anywhere the pop icon that the other was-) Solar storms occurring 30 years apart allow a father (Dennis Quaid) and son (Jim Caviezel) to talk through time using the same ham radio. In son’s present dad’s been dead for 30 years. As they talk history is changed. A seriel killer’s crime spree is altered making it worse. Once the son ( a cop) figures this out, father and son work together through time to solve the crime. ***It sounds kind of cheesy but I liked it.
Distribution:
Notes: This series was orginally started to be fun while I took a break from writing an angsty part of an another story...but I liked it enough to do a sequel and Gabby scared me enough to do another.
Feedback:
Dedication: Gabby- no not that one….the truly scary one, the friend, and cheerleader when she isn’t stalking the board and terrorizing. This is at her request. (oh, I didn't do any real work today because of the idea she started. Her fault, all of it.)
The Story So Far: But if you don’t- In to the Past- the fang gang finds a prophecy “The Vampire with a soul will be damned, his redemption lost, when the mate of his soul, is torn asunder by the demon that lies within.” Everybody pretty much realized that meant Angelus- Cordy is the only that doesn’t realize that she is the other part of the prophecy. Wolfram & Hart do a spell, dropping Cordy in 1898, Cordy runs into Angelus and the rest of the fanged four, but Angelus is the big worry, because he decides he likes her. Stalks her, Marks her. Cordy still hates him but can’t kill him because of the whole changing history thing. Angel and Wesley figure it out and save the day. There is a fight between Angelus and Angel. Ending with Angel telling Cordy his soul is secure and he loves her in the present. (NC-17) Oh, Angel remembers a brunette in his past that got away, the one as Angelus he marked, but the memory is fuzzy, so much that he doesn’t remember that he faced his future self, but he does remember she was brunette and thereby starting his blonde leanings. But as present Angel, he remebers and realizes who the brunette was. It's a happy time. Well for Angel. There is a tiny bit of angst- almost non-existent, then Cordy tells the present souled Angel to basically remark her. The ending is NC-17 and happy.
Now to the present- three weeks later. - Wolfram & Hart try again, this time bringing Angelus of 1898 to the present. Once he goes through the portal he remembers and wants Cordy, to turn her because well he liked her and she got away. He sort of wins making the prophecy come true for a version of a future, but Wesley figures out how to fix it, while present Angelus fights past Angelus. But the good guys prevail….and C/A end up happy and in love and Angelus of the past is back where he belongs. And present Angelus swept under the time changing rug. Things are good in my C/A universe.
Now….we are about a month later.
Part 1Cordelia bounced on the bed hard and stared. She frowned and bounced again. She nodded as the big naked lump stirred at the movement of the bed. She jumped one more time, flopping down next to the shifting vampire.
“What are you doing?” He grouched.
“Oh, I’m sorry did I wake you.” She smiled, sitting cross-legged.
Angel blinked open one eye at her innocent tone. “You know you did.”
“What I didn’t do anything.”
Angel groaned opening his other eye, staring. “Trying out the bed as a trampoline is doing something.”
“I don’t know what you are talking about you must have been dreaming.” Cordelia shook her head.
“Go away,” Angel turned on his side, clutching his pillow.
Cordelia narrowed her eyes at Angel’s broad back. Her silent Hmmph didn’t give way to her usual appreciation of the view. She was tempted to smack the spectacular ass. Cordy had a purpose. “Upsy daisy, Angel.” She nudged at his shoulder. “It’s a beautiful morning, the sun is shining, the birds are chirping.”
Angel turned his head. “Then go enjoy it,” grumbling, pulling the pillow over his head.
“Nope, not without you.” Cordy yanked at the pillow causing the vampire’s head to hit the mattress.
Angel turned and stared. “What exactly do expect me to do in the morning sunshine?”
“Get up, we can feed the chirping birds.”
“You’re insane.” He flopped back over.
Cordelia pushed at his shoulder. “Silly, you can stand in the shadows and watch me feed the birds.”
“Cordy, I’m not getting up. I’m tired. I didn’t get home until 4 am and I’m not watching you feed some squawking birds that are too stupid to find their own food.”
“Whose fault was that? Not mine. So, why should I be deprived of this beautiful morning, the chirping- very hungry- birds, and your company.”
Angel sat up. “Whose fault? How about the Soltex demon that was about to demolish lovers' lane and every necking couple there.” Angel growled. “I’m tired AND there is no way I going out to ENJOY this god damn beautiful morning. Go away.”
“Maybe,” Cordelia said sweetly ignoring his outburst. “If you had taken…I don’t know, another person, one that you’ve been training to fight, one that you said was getting quite good on that little escapade you could’ve gotten done sooner and been home in bed at reasonable hour. Then maybe you wouldn‘t be so grumpy. Hmmm. What do think about that?”
Angel closed his eyes. “You’re still mad at me and this is payback, isn’t it.”
“Me,” Cordelia pointed to her chest in wide-eyed mocked surprise. “Why would I be mad at you, the love of my life, my soul mate, my better half, the ying to my yang, the Penn to my Teller, the Neiman to my Marcus, the Rodeo to my Drive, the Beverly to my Hills, the …”
“Shut up.”
“But, Angel, all I’m saying is that I love you.”
“God,” Angel rubbed his temples, “How can you be so mean so early in the morning.” He whined.
“Mean? Angel, dearest to my heart, I brought you breakfast.” She took a mug from the bedside table.
Angel’s studied it warily. “What’s in it? I’m not drinking it.”
“You of little faith.” Cordelia tsked.
“Just yell or hit me, then let me get back to sleep, please.”
“Angel, silly love of my soul, the balm to my unrest, I don’t want to yell at you or hit you, I want to spend the day in your company, gazing in your eyes, telling you over and over again, how much I love you, vampire of my dreams.”
“What do I have to do for you to let me go back to sleep.” Angel begged.
“Well, maybe, just maybe, I can feed the poor starving little birdies on my own, if…”
“Whatever it is I’ll do it I swear.”
Cordelia cocked a brow at the vampire. “Let me go with you next time.”
“No, let’s go feed your little starving birdies.” Angel said clearly moving to get up.
“Angel.” Cordelia huffed pulling the vampire back. “I mean it, I want to go next time.”
“No.”
“Angel, that’s not fair.” Cordelia glared crossing her arms against her chest.
“Tough.”
“Angel, I’m going next time or else.”
“Or else what, you’re going to never let me sleep.”
“Oh, I’ll let you sleep and sleep and sleep, and that’s all you’ll ever being doing in this bed…alone.”
Angel narrowed his eyes. “You wouldn’t.”
“Just watch me, buster, watch me carry me, myself and I out of here.”
Angel held her glare. She was bluffing she had to be. “Cordy, you said that you wouldn’t ever use that as an ultimatum, you said you wouldn’t ever give that up.” He reached for her.
“Hmmph,” Cordelia slapped his hand away. “That’s when you were being just annoyingly over-protective and cute about the visions. But now you‘re being just annoyingly obnoxious and stupid. And since, Wesley found that potion, no more bad vision pain, couple of swigs and I‘m right as rain.” Cordy scrunched up her face, “I didn‘t say that…Anyway, there is no excuse now for not letting me go.“
“That’s not fair.” Angel started to get a little worried. It wasn’t as if he believed that Cordelia would actually move out of his bed forever, but she might do it for day or god forbid two.
“Tough.”
Angel wasn’t going to let her push him around. “I don’t want you to go on the visions, it’s too dangerous, don’t make Me.” he whined.
“Angel, you’re being a controlling dumb ass. You all needed my help last night. Look at you.” she pointed at the bandages that covered his chest. “Wesley and Gunn are even worse.”
“We handled it.”
“Angel, I’ve helped you before. If I can’t help you now because “We’re in love”,” she jabbed at the air making quotation marks. “Then we won’t be in love.”
“That’s ridiculous. We can’t just stop being in love.”
“Well, we sure can stop having sex.”
“No, we can’t.”
Cordelia raised her brows. “Really.”
“Really.” Angel moved, pulling her under him. “You can’t resist me.” He tried.
“Really? Is that a challenge, a dare, an arrogant boast that I hear? Hmm.”
Angel dropped his head on her chest in defeat at her steely hazel eyes. Damn, she’d do it just to prove she could. It would be hell. “How about a compromise? If we need help, you can come, but not every time and only when I say we need help.”
“How about when Wesley says.”
“Wesley? No, me.”
“No, Wesley, you’ll just say you never need help.”
Angel closed his eyes, mumbling into cushion of her malleable chest.
“What was that?” Cordelia looked down at the dark head, nestled in her breast making grumbling sounds.
“I said fine.”
“I don’t think that’s all you said,” she laughed, bringing up her fingers to tickle at the short hairs at the nape of the vampire’s neck.
Angel lifted his head at the ministrations then looked down at the soft cushion he’d buried his face in. The giggling body underneath was as naked as he was and scenting the air with a recognized and always welcomed fragrance. “You WERE bluffing.” He said accusingly.
“Pleeaase, Angel, like I would every give up making love to you. Hmmph. If you hadn’t been so grumpy you would’ve noticed sooner. Now let me up.”
“Why? You don’t want me too. I don’t want too.” Angel was back to whining.
“Because you’re tired remember and you need to rest to heal. Later.” She quickly kissed him.
Angel shook his head tightening his hold. “Well, I’m up now.” He moved adjusting his hips to show Cordy just how awake he was.
“That’s not saying much that part of you is always up.” Cordy rolled her eyes.
“Whose fault is that?” He nuzzled into her neck caressing along her side rounding her hip, his fingers inching to the soft triangular patch of curls.
“Better be mine.” The tips of her nails trailed down Angel’s spine, back to his neck, wrapping around him, shifting her thighs making way for Angel’s teasing touch. “Are you sure you’re healed enough? Maybe I should check.” She asked with the concern that was fighting her desire.
“You are checking,” Angel reassured the young woman with a slight chuckle, his lips moving to the small scared marks evident on the smooth skin on Cordy’s neck. His tongue swirling moistening the area as his fingers repeated the pattern causing tremors under Cordy’s flesh.
“Angel,” she gasped, wrapping her long legs around him, trying to fit the vampire in her. Angel pushed back, continuing with his incessant teasing, brushing through the curls, rubbing at the extended bud, massaging the moisture around, but never relieving the pressure that was building in Cordy‘s belly tensing her every muscle and squeezing at her nerves. “I’ll never be so mean so early in the morning if you stop teasing, I swear.” she begged.
“Angel,” she whimpered in complaint as his hands and lips left her.
Angel rose up on his elbows, imprisoning the young woman under him. “I don’t know Cordy, love of my life, my soul mate, my….”
“Angel,” Cordelia whined.
Angel smirked at Cordy’s pout.
“You’ll pay for this.”
Angel laughed. “So much for not being mean." Angel leaned down to capture her full lips, shutting off any more words.
Cordy sighed accepting the kiss, her hips eagerly complying with Angel’s hands raising her legs back around his waist. She gasped as he filled her, their kiss becoming more fervent. Angel’s hips moved, pushing deeper. Cordy gasped for air, her lips grazing Angel’s cheek as he burrowed his face back into her neck.
Hips moved simultaneously, force using force to create a delicate beautiful friction. Angel growled being swallowed by the heat. His fangs pierced the marks, instinctually claiming the woman he loved once again because it was allowed by her loving willingness. Cordelia’s voice tried to cry out in a scream only to be choked into a gasp as her blood was given to Angel and the intensity of his thrusts bombarded her nerves, squeezing at them until they exploded into a million flying colors.
The combined life flow of Cordelia’s blood pounding in his veins and her satin tight channel pulsating and contracting around him in her release surrounding his every dead cell, every nerve, every part of his body. The rush effused him with a moment of true life and pushing him over the edge. Angel growled out Cordelia’s name shuddering into her body, the feeling of being alive spilling out of. Angel groaned its loss but rejoiced in the continuing warmth soaking into his skin, evidencing that the love that permitted such a miracle was encased in the woman holding him and would be there always.
Angel shifted, keeping Cordy’s body close, licking at the marks that had once been Angelus, but now were only his.
Cordelia tenderly ran her hand through the thick hair at her cheek, scratching at the vampire’s scalp.
Angel rubbed further into her hand, a cross from a whimper and a moan softly growled from his throat. “Mine.”
“Mine.” Cordelia whispered in agreement and in her own murmured claiming.
Angel smiled kissing her gently, tucking her into him. “Now I’m tired.”
Cordelia smiled. “Me, too.”
“The little starving birds?” Angel cocked a raised brow.
“Stupid birds, if they can’t feed themselves.” Cordelia snuggled even closer.
Part 2
Lilah flexed her fingers happily. Freedom, finally from that damn cast. She groaned. Her delight disappeared as her eyes caught the memo again.
Great. Just Great. She read it again. It wasn’t the fact that she was being ordered to Linwood’s office that annoyed her per se. She was actually grateful for it. At least the Senior Partners weren’t going to out right kill her for that last time traveling Angelus fiasco. She had heard Jeremy hadn’t been so lucky. Still. Linwood was assigning her a new partner. Which meant, most likely that she was to be watched for any more screw-ups. God please don’t let it be another Jeremy.
***
Lilah’s eyes first went to Linwood at his acknowledgment. She nodded respectfully and then turned to the other presence in the room. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”
“Good to see you, too, Lilah.” Lindsay raised his fake hand.
“Sir,” Lilah swirled around to her boss. “He quit in snit, grabbed my ass. He should be dead.”
“Lilah, it was the hand. It was evil.”
Lilah could almost believe the sincere tone that uttered that nonsense if she hadn’t saw the rolling of Lindsay’s eyes. “This one’s new, won’t be going near your ass.” He smirked showing his new prosthetic hand.
“Great.” Lilah rolled her eyes as she sat in the chair in front of Linwood’s desk.
“Lilah, I do understand your hesitation, Lindsay has re-interviewed with the Senior Partners. This is their order. They feel with your combined strengths that the Special Project will flourish. Your first project together as been assigned.” Linwood shoved binder towards the two younger lawyers.
Lilah’s body hurt as she saw the file edging to her. She squelched down the remembered pain and cleared her throat. “That particular project,” Lilah took a deep breath,” failed two times.”
Linwood leaned back in his chair. “Yes, Lilah, we know that they were yours and that they failed.”
Lilah choked her gulp. “Then we know. And the vehicle that would allow this project is dead.”
“Yes, but you very aptly kept a copy of the spell and Lindsay found another spell-caster. So, this time between the two of you we expect that it will get done, correctly. That’s all.” Linwood dismissed the lawyers.
Once the doubly thick polished doors slammed, Lilah turned on Lindsay. “This is a set up. You are setting me up.” She glared.
“Now, Lilah, why would you say that? I’m here to help.”
“With this plan? You do realize that it has failed TWICE,” she glared, “and I’ve ended up in the hospital each time,” she added.
“Side effects of war, Lilah, just side effects.” Lindsay’s gave a cocky salute with his prosthetic hand.
Part 3
Lindsay sat behind the desk.
“That’s my desk.” Lilah glared.
“True, but the way you’re pacing it’s safer over here. Those heels of yours look lethal."
Lilah glared throwing the file on the desk. “It doesn’t work.”
Lindsey leaned up. “It can. You just went about it wrong.”
“What?” Lilah was ready to fly over HER desk and throttle the condescending lawyer.
Lindsay ignored the flashing eyes and clenching fists directed at him. “What were the problems before?”
Lilah glared for a moment at the question then blew out a burst of air and threw up her hands. “Angel and well Angelus.” She resumed her incessant pacing.
“Why?”
Lilah glared again at Lindsay patronizing tone. “ Look, I don’t know why your here but DO NOT think that if any one dies out of this third try it WON’T be you. I’ll make sure of it.”
“Lilah, Lilah, I come in peace.” Lindsay raised his hands.
Lilah scoffed.
Lindsay shook his head. “Believe it or not I’m back, really, life sucks and I just decided to go where I had little bit more of control over it and a great 401 K. And in my wanders back, I found the spell caster.”
“So what? We try to do the time portal again and we lose.” Lilah gave up her pacing and slumped in the chair across from Lindsay.
“Because of Angel.”
“Well, YEAH, it’s not really a surprise anymore and then there is Angelus - he’s not real controllable.”
“Don’t worry about Angelus.”
“Don’t worry about Angelus?” Lilah repeated incredulously. “He’s worth worrying about. Jesus. We ARE going to die.”
“We aren’t going to die. And as for Angel we won’t let him figure it out.”
Lilah stared at the attractive man. “Believe me letting Angel know wasn’t on our high list of priorities.”
“But he found out.”
“Because of the little shit Jeremy throwing his card around like a big fat neon flashing sign and I ended up in a cast.”
“Be grateful, he ended up dead. Angel found out because he knew Cordelia was missing, this time he won’t.”
Lilah gave a puzzled look, considering Lindsay’s statement. “What’s your plan?”
Lindsay pulled out a piece of paper from his jacket.
Lilah took it. “This is….not the same spell.” She corrected as she reread it.
“Substantially, the same but with a crucial added difference. Cordelia’s soul not her body will be transported through the time portal. Her body will be safely here useless. Angel will be focused on that.”
Lilah narrowed her eyes. “Okay. Angel won’t jump to the conclusion that her soul as been tossed…when? But, how will Angelus know that there is a soul floating around in the etherlands?”
“We’ll tell him.”
Lilah tapped her fingers together. “Lindsay, I see that you’ve given this some thought and are quite smug about it, but it’s STUPID. Angelus doesn’t want to destroy Cordelia’s soul so much as destroy it by turning her. He wants the body. Believe me this I know.”
“We’ll give it to him. We send the soul back to a time that it has a pretty young body, Cordelia’s body, to go to. We send Angelus after it.”
“Lindsay, he doesn’t a want a child’s body. He wants the grown up version. And that body is protected by Angel.”
Lindsay shook his head. “Not in Sunnydale. Read his history. In Sunnydale the only woman, teenager actually, Angel was obsessed with was the slayer. There’s no indication from his files that he even noticed Cordelia except as a teenager that was a part of the slayer’s small group of friends. A very beautiful physically quite mature teenage Cordelia Chase. About 17, I’d imagine. It wasn’t until LA that their love blossomed to the destructive plateau that keeps getting in our way.
***
“You don’t think that even slayer obsessed Angel with a soul wouldn’t get just a little protective of a teenage girl that was being stalked by his past evil self. I bet he would notice her then.”
“You’re forgetting that he wasn’t always the vampire without a soul then. He lost his soul in 1998. That Angelus wouldn’t give a damn about protecting a teenage girl.”
Lilah nodded, and then raised her eyes in question. “Why do we even need the past Angelus, just send her back, and let the 1998 Angelus deal with her.”
“Because that Angelus didn’t notice Cordelia. That past already happened. Cordelia lived through the Angelus period and ended up four years later soul mates with Angel. No, we need the Angelus that wants her.”
“I can’t imagine two Angelus’ being any safer than Angel and Angelus together in the same spot.”
“But, Lilah, it will be 1998, you and I will be safely in LA, just being introduced to the wonders of Wolfram & Hart and NOW we will be in LA with Angel who will be running around trying to figure why the love of his life is in a coma. Cordelia will be the only one facing two Angelus. Hell, if the 1998 version does notice her -let the Angelus’ fight it out. Either way, whichever kills her or turns her, we’re safe and the plan a success.”
“Don’t be so sure that Angel won’t come to us.” She looked at his hand to remind him of how dangerous that prospect could be.
Lindsay nodded in concession. “Okay, so maybe as the only ones at Wolfram & Hart that knows the plan, we should take a short sabbatical.”
“Hide?”
“Move our base of operations, rather. I don’t want to lose another hand, do you want to end up in the hospital again?”
“No. Where do we start?”
Lindsay held the paper back up.
Part 4
Angel cradled Cordy in his arms. The woman was grounding her fists in her eyes, grimacing.
Wesley immediately was at Angel’s side with an ornate old bottle handing it to the vampire.
“Drink, baby.” Angel held the bottle to Cordelia’s lips.
Cordelia nodded, sipping at the potion. Cordelia pushed the bottle away. “Eww. God that stuff is gross.” She complained. Cordelia unclenched her fist, rubbing her face and the pain that had been etched on her beautiful face disappeared. “But, damn, it works.” She took a deep breath, smiling at the vampire.
“Cordy?” Angel could feel the cessation of the tremors that had over taken Cordy’s body when the vision hit but still he couldn’t trust that all the pain had been alleviated.
“Angel,” Cordy raised her hand attempting to smooth the worry on his handsome face. “Really, a couple of aspirin and I’ll be fine.”
Fred dutifully held out two pills and a bottle of water.
Cordelia smiled her thanks.
Angel got to his feet helping Cordelia to stand.
“The vision?” Wesley asked.
“A couple of vampires hanging out at the boardwalk waiting for wandering food. A young couple.”
Angel nodded going for his coat. Cordelia moved to follow.
Angel turned. “I can handle two vampires, Cordelia.”
“You might…”
“No.”
Wesley shook his head. Gunn rolled his eyes. “Are they ever going to stop with this?"
Wesley comment was cut short by the yell directed towards him.
“Wesley,” both Cordy and Angel faced him with stubborn glares.
Wesley took off his glasses, rubbing at his eyes. He hated that they but him in the middle of their tug of wills. No matter what he said, one of them would be mad it was a no win no win situation. But they both had reminded him that he was the boss. Wesley took a deep breath. “Cordelia, Angel can handle two vampires alone very well.”
“Hmmph,” She glared, starting to argue, when her eyes went blank, and she slumped to the ground.
“Cordy,” Angel rushed to the unconscious girl. “What the hell? Cordy,” He knelt feeling for her pulse.
Wesley, Gunn, and Fred ran to his side.
“What’s wrong with her?” “Is she?”
“No, but…Wesley, she won’t wake up.”
“I…”
“You said that potion wasn’t harmful.” Angel shot accusingly.
“It’s not, none of the ingredients are dangerous.” Wesley leaned down worriedly. “I can’t explain this.”
“Man, we got to take her to the hospital.” Gunn said.
Angel looked to Wesley. “The last time…”
“Angel,” Wesley frowned, “That was because of Vocah’s curse, she was in the throes of a physic episode as a result of the visions. She doesn’t seem in any mental or physical distress….”
“She won’t wake up.” Angel growled, harshly disputing Wesley’s definition of ‘distress’. “And she just had a vision and that potion.”
Wesley considered and made his decision. “Take her upstairs, I’ll analyze the potion again and we’ll call Lorne possibly he can tell us if this is a result of a mystic force. If it’s natural or he can’t tell we’ll take her to the hospital.” Wesley looked to Angel for his answer.
Angel nodded, picking up the lifeless young woman.
“Um,” Fred bit her lip, concern for Cordy clear on her brow. “I…the vision?” She hated to bring it up but there was a couple to be saved.
“I’m not leaving Cordy.” Angel growled.
Gunn grabbed his jacket. “I got it.”
Wesley looked at his friend then at the vampire, clearly torn.
“Wesley, I can call Lorne and do the analysis, it will be like chemistry, I was good at that in school, not as good as in math, but I can do it.” Fred insisted, determined to help the best way she could.
Wesley nodded gratefully at the young woman. “Gunn and I will go take care of the vampires.”
Angel didn’t even bother to acknowledge Wesley’s statement already up the stairs.
***
Both Lilah and Lindsay looked at the cloaked figure and the glowing orb in his hands.
“That’s it?” Lilah asked.
“Yes. The woman’s soul is contained.”
“So, we just toss it through the portal?” Lilah asked.
The cloaked figure nodded. “Once broken the soul will be released, it will seek out its appropriate vessel.”
“And in 1998, that would a seventeen year old Cordelia Chase.”
The cloaked figure nodded.
“Do it.” Lilah ordered.
The cloaked figure began mumbling. A flash tore through the fabric of the air, expanding and swirling at his words, once completely formed, the spell caster threw the glass orb into the opening. The cloaked figure slumped as the portal closed.
“I require rest before repeating the next spell.”
“Sure, time is our friend on this one.” Lindsay pointed to a door. “There’s a bed in there.”
Lilah picked up the phone. “You want something from room service.”
“Roast Beef,” Lindsay nodded, pulling out his cell phone to set the next stage of their plan in motion.
Part 5
1998
Cordelia jerked up in her bed. Whoa, what a dream. She blinked looking around for Angel. Where was he? He had to be back from dusting the vampires. Cordelia scrunched up her face. When did she fall asleep?
Her eyes widened as she saw her surroundings. Okay. She was still dreaming. Cordelia blinked again. Nope, didn’t work. She closed her eyes and pinched her arm as hard as she could. She slowly opened her eyes and shut them immediately. Okay, this was way wrong. Cordy's eyes shot back open at knock at the door.
“Miss Chase.” A familiar voice traveled into the room, one not heard in over three years. “Miss Chase,” the voice repeated.
“Marie?” Cordy squeaked.
“Miss Chase,” an older woman opened the door, her clothes confirming her status as a maid. “It’s time to get up. You don’t want to be late for school.”
“Uh.” Cordy closed her eyes again, praying that the woman and the room would vanish.
“Miss Chase, are you not well?” The maid came closer to the bed.
“Oh god.”
“Miss Chase, Cordelia?” The woman asked in concern, reaching out to touch the young girl’s forehead.
“Fine, I’m fine, I’m fine,” Cordelia clenched at the covers. Oh god. She saw the familar expensive pretty comforter buddle in her fists. Oh god.
“Are you…?”
“Thank you, Marie,” Cordelia forced down the panic in her voice, willing her self not to scream.
“Breakfast is ready, when you are, but you better hurry you don't want to be late for school."
Cordy nodded, not trusting her ability to speak. As soon as the door closed, Cordelia shot up from the bed, her eyes darting around. There was no denying it she was in her room back in Sunnydale. Which was impossible because she was in LA, annoyed that Wesley took Angel’s side about her going with him on the vision. So, she couldn’t be in her old bedroom in Sunnydale.
Cordelia looked down, her hand twisting in the silk nightgown. Angel, she wanted to scream out, but nothing came out but a gasp. She wasn’t supposed to be wearing a nightgown. Cordy slept in the nude, she had ever since Angel pouted like a big baby the first time she tried to sleep in anything. But then again, she wasn’t even supposed to be asleep or in Sunnydale or….Cordelia forced the scream down in her throat.
Cordelia stepped to her dresser tentatively fingering the items on it- Yep, her brush, her perfume, and her pictures. She slowly picked up the frame photo of her and Xander. She quickly put it face down. She raised her eyes to the mirror.
She shook her head trying vehemently to deny the image of the teenage beautiful girl with long mahogany hair that shook her head back in return. Cordelia looked down at her manicured toes, following the line of her legs up to the hem of her nightgown. She slowly raised the silky garment. Her hand brushed the smooth unblemished skin of her lower abdomen. She slowly looked around, her eyes fixing on the blaring absence of a sun tattoo. She closed her eyes, dropping her gown and then looked back at her reflection. She peered closer, now pushing back the dark hair. She traced the marks on her neck. Hold on. Teenage Cordy never had a vamp hickie on her proclaiming her the property of Angel. What was going on? Physically she was her seventeen-year-old self in every way but that.
Cordelia walked stunned back to the bed, hugging at her knees trying to think.
All the evidence pointed to the bizarre conclusion that she was back in Sunnydale as a 17 year old except with her 20-year-old mind. But why, how…? Think. She had a vision. Cordelia took the potion. She stood up. Started to argue with Angel, she….nothing.
Okay, possible side effect of the visions, maybe they finally drove her crazy, or it could’ve been the potion. Maybe she was safely in LA, just crazy. Cordelia could hope. Angel wouldn’t let her stay crazy for long.
She didn’t feel crazy, well actually she did and if she felt crazy didn’t that mean she wasn’t. Now she was driving herself crazy. She stopped that train of thought. Cordelia wanted to be crazy in LA with Angel not in Sunnydale in her 17-year-old body.
Cordelia slowly got to her feet. She couldn’t stay hiding in her room. She thought about it a minute. Why not? She shook her head. If she was in Sunnydale then she needed to find out why and how. What had Marie said? School. Cordelia sighed it looked like she would be revisiting her alma mater and its library.
Part 6
London 1898
“My Darling Boy,” Darla caressed Angelus scowling face. “Why so unhappy? Don’t you like my little gift?”
Angelus stared down at the bound crying woman, her long dark hair hiding her face. The hair. There was something about the hair, the color. He slowly rose from the plush velvet chair kneeling when he got to the woman.
Darla grinned clapping her hands together. “That’s right, my boy. Let’s play with the lovely.”
Angelus grabbed a fistful of the bountiful hair, yanking the woman’s face to his. He scowled as the frightened teary blue eyes stared back. He studied the pert nose, the too thin lips. Pretty. Angelus growled slamming the woman’s face to the floor, causing blood to spread underneath. “I can get my own food,” stepping away from the woman.
“Angelus, what is wrong with you, first you disappear for days and, for some reason cut you hair why you don't even know and come home only to act like a petulant child.” Darla scolded harshly coming up to the vampire.
“Get out of my face, Darla.”
Darla raised her hand, backhanding Angelus. “Don’t talk to me like that, I am your sire,” her eyes flashing. “Now eat the girl and be a good boy.”
Angelus growled throwing Darla across the room. “I am not a fledging, you need to start remembering that,” storming out of the elegant room.
“Daddy’s head is all clouded.” Drusilla crooned from the doorway.
Darla glared, getting to her feet. “Be quiet, you twit.”
“Come on, Pet. Let’s go somewhere fun, this sure and hell isn’t” Spike tugged at his sire.
***
Angelus angrily stalked the streets of the East End heading towards Gertie’s. The other late night wanders kept out his way, even the streetwalkers, all sensing the danger that flowed from the dark handsome man.
Angelus growled, fingering his hair, ignoring the scattering mortals. He had no memory of cutting it, just like he had no memory of his missing days and nights. All he remembered was waking up dazed in an alley, bruised, feeling as if he had been beaten and then put to sleep. Yet, there was a vague vision of brown hair, beauty, fire, and need. A woman. One he tasted, marked, one that got away. He did remember that. Angelus had wanted to turn the brunette, place her at his side; the ache to do so was a constant pounding in his head. But he hadn’t been able to, something, …no not something- another vampire had taken her from him.
Angelus turned at a slight sound coming from the adjoining alley. A streetwalker was servicing a man against the dirty bricks. Angelus narrowed his eyes, seeing the dark color of the woman’s hair as her head moved, moaning in fake pleasure. Angel’s eyes glowed yellow, his demon bringing forth his fangs and ridged brow as he saw the man thrust repeatedly into the woman.
Angelus ripped the man off the woman, breaking his neck easily. He yanked at the woman pulling her face up to him. He growled, breaking her neck also. The woman fell to the ground her dead green eyes and rotten teeth gapped up in shocked surprise.
Angelus swirled around sensing more movement. The alley filled with men, in strange dress armed with unfamiliar weapons. The air crackled behind Angelus, sizzling and opening into a swirling hole. Angelus stared at the expanding hole, the phenomenon triggering his memories, clearing the fog. He slowly smiled turning back to the men, his human face sliding over his expression. “Lilah, send you?”
The man assuming the lead position lowered his weapon, as the other men’s weapons remained trained on the vampire. “She requests your help on some unfinished business.”
“By all means.” Angelus laughed. He was getting another chance to get his Cordy.
Part 7
Present
Angelus stepped out of the portal, his eyes targeting Lilah's. “Where is she?”
“Good to see you too, Angelus.”
“Lilah, I haven’t forgotten my promise to cut you into little pieces if you interfere with my desire to have Cordy.”
Lilah gave a slight smile, nodding to the security guards that appeared after Angelus, beckoning them to keep their tranquilizer guns pointed at the vampire. “I do remember something about torture, but not the cutting up bit.”
“I must’ve left it out. Where is she?”
“Cordelia Chase is no longer in this time.” Lindsay stepped forward.
“Who are you?” Angelus studied the man, his eyes resting momentarily on his prosthetic.
“I’m work for the same employers as Lilah. Our objective remains the same as before.”
“To kill Cordelia and damn my future ensouled self. Well, I don’t want him damned, I want him dead. I want Cordy." He growled.
“You succeed he’ll be gone and we’re more flexible about how you kill Cordelia Chase this time around, turn her if you want, we don’t care.”
Angelus narrowed his eyes. “I'm remaining here." Angelus jerked his head towards Lilah. “That bitch wanted to send me back.”
“And here I thought we had gotten so close.” Lilah snorted.
“What? You want to spread you’re legs for me again. You wouldn’t live through it this time. Hey, that would be fun.” He winked with smirk.
“As tempting as that is, I’ll pass.” Lilah stepped back even further from the vampire.
Lindsay rolled his eyes. “You fucked Angelus? What couldn’t get Angel in your bed so you went with the evil version? You’re a real piece of work.”
“So, says the man that had the hots for the syphilic whore.” Lilah scoffed.
“Children, do I need to start ripping heads off.” Angelus said menancingly, low but with the ability to stop the lawyers bickering.
Lindsay turned back to the vampire. “It was a mistake to try to send you back to a time period that would only lead to you getting cursed again.”
Lilah narrowed her eyes. “Angel would be damned. He wouldn’t have a soul.”
“In the 21st century, but that one,” Lindsay pointed to Angelus, “Would just get one back in the 19th century. Didn’t you ever watch Star Trek? No, Angelus needs to be sent to a time after Angel gets his soul so it won’t happen again. Another reason to send him to 1998.”
“I like it here in the 21st.”
“It’s a only a few years back and in the here and now, Cordelia was protected by Angel.”
“I can kill him.”
“Yes, but there are certain advantages for you by going back, the most obvious one, of course is, that’s where Cordelia’s soul is.”
“Soul? I don’t want her soul.” Angelus growled.
“We understand that, but that is the soul you need to destroy, and right now it’s being housed in a slighty younger Cordelia Chase. And better yet, while Angel knows that Cordelia he has no interest in her. In fact, he’s in love with the slayer.”
Angelus fell into the nearest chair slightly nauseous. “I don’t believe you. In love with a slayer? Impossible.” The more he heard about his future self the more it sickened him.
“Sorry, but it’s true. She’s a friend of Cordelia’s. Buffy Summers, blonde very pretty, if that makes you feel any better.” Lindsay said somewhat sympathetically as the vampire got even paler than his natural complexion.
“It’s doesn’t.” Angelus head started to hurt. Vampires were supposed to kill slayers. His future self had to die.
“Of course, Angel isn’t really Angel right now or rather right then. He lost his soul after having sex with the slayer, triggering a happy clause in the curse. Now or rather then, he’s obsessed with terrorizing her and her friends. He’s Angelus, you. But, you shouldn’t have to worry about him interfering with your plans for Cordelia. From the files of the era, he barely notices her. He gets his soul back a few months later.”
“NO.” Angelus stood. “Not me- no matter what he calls himself.” Angelus could barely believe it. Angelus would never love a slayer or not notice Cordy. That Angelus was as much of a fraud as the ensouled freak. “I’ll kill him.”
“Okay.” Lindsay shrugged. “Angelus, we won’t send you back to 1898 but also know we won’t bring you back to this time, but that shouldn’t bother you, you like it in this time, well its only 2002. You’ll be damn close to the 21st century and you’ll have Cordelia.”
Lilah looked at Lindsay, galled that the other lawyer told Angelus the truth.
Angelus studied the lawyer, his expression passive, slowly nodding. Four years, he wouldn’t wait that long to kill the lawyers.
Part 8
Angel stood as Lorne hurried into the room. “Freddykins said that the princess….” The green demon halted and gulped as he stared at prone body on the bed. “Angel.” Lorne looked at the vampire.
“You’ve got to help her. I don’t know what’s wrong with her. She won’t wake up. She just lies there barely breathing her eyes staring blankly at the ceiling.”
Lorne nodded the vampire’s morose and frightened expression worrying him more than Angel’s words.
Lorne sat on the edge of the bed, placing his fingertips on Cordelia’s temples. “Come on, sweetie, tell your best bud Lorne what’s going on in that beautiful head of yours.” Lorne beckoned. Lorne frowned, lifting his fingers, studying the young woman. He tried again. “Come on, honey.” Lorne closed his eyes his hands leaving her face to briefly clutch at her hand, stood up, and took a deep breath before turning to face Angel.
“Lorne?”
The demon half waved and half shrugged. “I don’t know, Angel,” his voice serious. “I can’t read anything from her.”
“So, it’s not mystical.” Angel didn’t know if that relieved him or not. He wasn’t a doctor, if it was physical, Angel couldn’t do anything but wait and hope and he had to do something, seeing Cordelia like this was killing him.
“I didn’t say that. I can’t read ANYTHING, Angel. No aura, no nothing. Her soul is gone. The princess is empty. Something stole her soul and that isn't natural.” Lorne empahized.
Fred gasped, standing in between Wesley and Gunn. All three were huddled in the doorway.
Angel blinked. “Her soul? She’s alive. Her soul can’t be gone.”
Fred blinked up to Wesley. “Will she wake up evil, like Angel if he lost his soul?”
“She didn’t lose her soul.” Angel growled.
“Angel cakes, it’s gone, what’s left is a vessel only.” Lorne said gently.
Wesley moved in the room. “She won’t wake up will she- not without her soul.”
Lorne shook his head. “Unlike Angel cakes, she needs her soul. Angel’s a vampire, the soul an anomaly. Without it, he still is a vampire. Angel is his ‘self’ abet nasty. But, the Princess is a human, her soul is who she is- the body merely a beautiful vessel, it lives but it’s not animated with ‘Cordy’. It’s nothing.”
Angel stilled. “It’s Cordelia. She’s in there.” His voice straining not to break.
Wesley stared at Cordy’s body. “Someone must have done a spell, it’s the only way.”
Angel’s jerked his head up moving towards the door. Finally, something he could hear, giving him something to do.
“Angel, where are you going?”
“To pay Lilah a visit,” he growled disappearing.
“Those bastards wouldn’t be stupid enough to mess with Cordy again….” Gunn grunted and answered his own question. “Of course they would.” He nodded to Wesley. “Should we go with him?”
“We would just get in the way. Fred, could you please help me. If Angel doesn’t find the answers at Wolfram & Hart, we need too.”
Fred blinked her teary gaze away from Cordy, nodding.
“Fuck, that law firm needs to be blown up.” Gunn grunted.
Lorne nodded in complete agreement.
Part 9
1998
Cordelia walked up the sidewalk. She paused as she tugged at her turtleneck. God. She had hoped to never see Sunnydale High again. She thought her wish had been granted when it exploded into bits and pieces along with the snake of a mayor at graduation. She just hadn’t seen any other option. It was the only place she knew with the books that could hopefully help her.
Cordelia had decided against rushing right in and asking Giles for help. There was no question that Buffy’s watcher was the expert in researching, but she didn’t want to sound crazy until she had to.
Cordy jumped as an arm flung it self around her shoulders and a ‘hi Hon,’ sounded in her ear.
She turned ready to swing. Oh god. “Xander?”
“Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.”
“You didn’t,” she said sharply.
Xander shuffled a little staring at his feet. “Your still mad, uh. I explained why we couldn’t go to the movies last night. I had to help Buffy. I’ll make it up to you tonight, I promise.”
“Not now, Xander.” Cordelia wanted to go run back to her room. She should’ve guessed at this one by the picture on her dresser and the lack of scar on her stomach. She was 17 and back to dating Xander.
“Not now, tonight,” he grinned goofily in his very cute way.
Think. Think. Think. Cordelia sighed. She couldn’t do anything to uncharacteristic, like hug the young man. She actually was kind of happy to see him. That is if he had showed up a few years from then at the Hyperion, but here, now, when they were dating. Cordelia wanted to groan. Instead, she rolled her eyes. “Right, if 'little Miss likes to slay' doesn’t yank your leash.” She huffed and turned her back on him going into the school.
Xander sighed, shuffling his feet, watching as Cordelia’s flounced away. Wow. She really did have a great ass.
“Hey, Xander.”
“Whoa, down with the sneaky and scaries.” Xander jumped.
Buffy snorted as Willow giggled.
“What’s wrong you with you?”
“You mean other than you two taking a couple of years off my life.”
Buffy rolled her eyes. “Pfft. Wasn’t that Cordelia?”
“She’s mad at me.”
“And that’s new from yesterday, how?” Buffy hooked an arm in his elbow. “Let’s go to school. You’ll make up in time for your next fight.”
Willow nodded. “Which should be right after lunch.”
***
Cordelia stood at her locker, staring at the lock. She couldn’t remember the combination. For four years, five days a week, except summers, she had twirled that stupid thing, yet for the life of her she couldn’t think of the first number. Her mind was a complete blank, hell she didn't even know what class she was supposed to be in. Screw it. She already graduated. Cordelia had the charred diploma to prove it.
Cordelia headed straight for the school library.
Great it was empty. Not so great, her mind changing as Giles wandered from his office his head buried in a book. Typical. “Hi, Giles.”
Giles jerked his head up, stumbling a few steps as he blinked through his glasses. “Cordelia, aren’t you supposed to be in history class?”
History. Cordelia nodded. And after that she had Trig, gym, lunch, chemistry, English, study hall, and then she would gather with the Scoobies to listen to Xander and Willow fawn over Buffy, while Buffy told them her latest complaints and crisis. Oz would just nodd and keep his arm looped over the pretty red head. He had been as much of a fool as she had been. On the hopeful side, maybe if Cordy were really lucky, it would just be a bad hair day rather than Buffy going on about Angel. Cordelia’s thoughts jerked to screeching halt. Angel would show up eventually. Oh god. Could she see him and not run throwing herself into his arms begging him to fix whatever was happening?
“Cordelia?” Giles nudged at his glasses, concerned with the sudden lack of color on the young woman’s face.
Cordy gulped and brought her eyes back to the librarian. “What?”
“Are you well? You look quite ashen, perhaps you should sit down.”
“That’s very good with the flattering bit, Geez,” Cordelia rolled her eyes.
“Or perhaps, you should get to your classes.”
“No," Cordelia back peddaled. "I did feel a bit faint, sorry I got snappy. Blood loss to the head, makes me cranky, Mrs. Sanderson said I could go lie down. But, eww, lie on an infirmary bed. Who knows who’s been there last and with what, so I came here. No one comes in here. Well except the dorks and the geeks.” Cordelia found it a little scary how easy it was to slip back into her high school attitude.
“Yes, well…”
“Don’t let me disturb whatever dusty old prophecy, scroll or spell you happened to be boring yourself with,” she waved him away.
Giles nodded not quite sure what to say in response.
“Hey, Giles,” Cordelia called after the man. “What do you know about time travel?”
“Time travel?” Giles paused in his return to his office. He took his glasses off and faced Cordelia. “Time travel is the result of some very imaginative intelligent writers and film makers and more very bad ones.”
“So you’re saying fiction, this from a slayer’s watcher. For a major believer of prophecies, demons, vampires, portals, witches, and other nifty supernatural stuff, you’re a little closed minded, aren’t you? Tsk, Tsk. So, does that mean you don’t have any books on the subject in the those stacks of old books.”
Giles nudged at his glasses. 'Niffy'? “I believe there are some books of Fiction in aisle three.”
“Fiction, great. Hey..” Cordelia blew a burst of air through her lips. Boy, did Giles’ English English get more proper and clipped when he was annoyed, just like Wesley. It must have to do with boarding schools or maybe the water in England.
“Excuse me?” Giles paused again in the doorway of his office.
“I asked if you had a paper and pen, I left mine…some where…” She gestured wildly.
“You asked, a Wesley, for paper and pen.”
“I did? Whoops.” She smacked her hand over her mouth. “I….wow, light headed again,” she waved in front of her face briskly. “Blood loss, scary thing.” She beamed a great smile.
Giles studied the young woman for moment. He very rarely understood his charges completely and at times found their teenage behavior quite bizarre, but Cordelia’s was more confusing than usual that morning. He shook his head went into his office returning with some paper and a pen.
“Thank you, Giles. See I know who you are, the blood back swirling around getting those brain gears working again.”
“Yes. Um. I’ll be in my office if you need anything else.”
Cordelia nodded. That didn’t go to badly. On a scale of one to ten it was a definite one and half. Cordelia sighed sitting down, pulling at the paper. Time travel, what did she know? Not much only what she learned from the Star Trek episodes that Wesley had made her watch and what she had experienced for her self.
She wrote. DON’T CHANGE HISTORY.
Good, but that didn’t help her with how she ended up with her 20-year-old mind in her 17-year-old past. She sighed. Her first real coherent thought while she was driving to school had been that Wolfram & Hart was behind it some how. But by the time she pulled into the parking lot, she hadn’t been able to make sense of that reasoning. Before, they had sent her back body and everything so Angelus could kill her, and then brought Angelus forward when that had failed. But, why just send back her mind. Why now? Even if Angelus showed up, Angel would protect her. Sure, the vampire of this time didn’t know that she was his soul mate he thought Buffy was….eww. Cordelia shook away that painful strain of thought. She had been trying very hard not to think about the what of Buffy and Angel during this when she found herself trapped in.
Questionable taste aside, Angel was still a good guy in this now and Cordelia couldn’t believe that this sexy, stoic, all black wearing, major broody, obsessed with Buffy version would just sit by if his evil past self showed up and tried to kill her. So, really it wouldn’t be that different than when Angelus showed up in 2002, well without the happy mind-blowing sex once the bad guys were beaten.
Previous vow not to risk changing history by going straight to this Angel and unburden her plight notwithstanding, if Angelus showed up, she was running to the vampire with the soul.
Cordelia sighed and rubbing at the marks under her sweater wishing so much that she was back with her Angel. She glanced down at her list. Nothing. Except the Star Trek rule and a bunch of doodles and scribbles. Big help. She squinted at the numbers written on the page. “Eureka.” She slapped her hand over her mouth. Damn that Wesley.
“Cordelia?”
Cordelia smiled. “Hey look.”
“Don’t change history?”
“Oh.” Cordelia slammed the pad down. “No, I just remembered my locker combination. Blood loss, all gone.” She smiled in explanation.
Giles nudged at his glasses entirely confused. “Well then I guess you should go to your next class.”
Cordelia flopped her head on the desk. Trig. She hated Trig. It wasn’t fair. Cordelia had already graduated. Oh well, maybe she’d remember the answers and not actually have to think about the math problems.
“Sure, why not.” Cordelia sighed. “See ya later, Giles.”
Part 10
Present
Wesley stood as Angel entered the lobby.
“Lilah’s gone, her secretary said medical leave. I searched her office, after I questioned a few other employees before security showed. Nothing, no indication what they did to Cordelia.”
“Maybe they didn’t maybe it’s a new threat.” Wesley suggested.
Angel stared at his friend. “It’s them. I’ll go back and question some more tomorrow night.”
“They’re security will be better, Gunn and I will go with you.”
“I’m quicker on my own.” He turned going up the stairs, to Cordelia.
“Was that blood on his shirt, is he hurt?” Fred worried her lip.
“That wasn’t his.” Gunn shook his head. “Questioning? The vamp beat the shit out of some lawyers tonight.”
“Maybe even killed some.” Wesley shrugged.
“Wesley…?” Fred blinked up.
“I’ll give a damn when I’m sure that Wolfram & Hart had nothing to do with what happened to Cordelia.” Wesley went back into his office.
“Charles?” Fred asked.
“Girl, got to side with Wesley and the vamp on this one. It’s Cordy.”
“I know, so don’t you think tomorrow you and Wesley should go with him, more ground covered and lawyers questioned?”
“Girl?” Gunn asked shocked.
“It’s Cordy, she’s my friend.” Fred stated firmly.
***
Angel moved the chair next to the bed, his hand moving to take hold of Cordy’s still one. The warmth was still there proving life, but the spirit, the essence that made his heart impossibly beat, was absent. Angel would give his soul for hers, anything to see the light that caused those blank dead brown eyes to flare, flash and twinkle with a kaleidoscope of brown, gold and green hues. Her laugh, her scolding, her pout, her smile, god her smile, her unimaginable love, he needed it all back. Angel tightened his grasp over the young woman’s hand resting his head over her low heart beat, promising the fragile sound that he would fix it, bring her back to him. He had to.
Part 11
1998
God that was horrifying. Cordelia was in hell. She knew it. High School sucked. How did she not know that when she was there? Sure, she had finally figured out that she was on the HELLmouth, but how come she hadn’t realized how hellish the whole high school experience had been.
She hadn’t forgotten how dating Xander had pushed her from her Queen C pedestal, but the remembered version hadn't been that bad, she had managed to block out all the whispers and idiotic behavior of her former friends/sheep. The first time around, Cordelia had held her head high, and gave them her ‘I am still Cordelia Chase, superior, don’t you forget it’ glare, now her glare was accompanied by the ‘Jesus, grow up and get a life, don’t waste time being idiots, there’s bad shit out there, being the most popular in a school that’s doomed to blow up, isn’t the be and end all of existence’, roll of her eyes.
Hmmph. God, how far had her life taken her in less than four years, but then she guessed having the visions, being kidnapped, and tortured more times than had to be necessary could do that to a person, hell, she was in her 17 year old body, reliving Trig and Harmony’s pathetic attempt to be Queen H-kidnapped AND tortured, a two for one hellish deal.
Cordelia had half a mind to rip into Harmony, since the real villains of her unbearable plight were unknown and unreachable, and explain very slowly to the dim girl that second ditzy bananas didn’t make very good bitches and that Harmony would make an even worse vampire than bitch in the future. Harmony's major sheepish behavior, being the main personality trait that followed her to the undead-life…and the well, the need to kill, but Harmony would still need a crazy bunch of Amway vamp’s too tell her how to do that-the girl was a follower and would always be one.
Then there was Xander, sweet, okay, except she knew where that future went, a stab to the gut and a lovely break up scar as a souvenir. She almost decked him that last time he tried to wheedle her into a closet. Kissing in a closet. God. Okay, it was fun THEN. But now, Cordelia wanted to scream.
She pushed her way into the library. Oh yeah, the gang was all there. She had managed to avoid actually talking to Buffy or Willow for the entire day. Not that she would’ve minded under other circumstances, like three-fours years in the future in LA, but now then, the blonde little slayer was probably going to regale them with an hour full of Angel this and Angel that drama. And Willow, hell, she’d just stammer and nod sympathetically to every conceived woe of ‘Buffy the Greats’ drama filled life, while Oz gazed adoringly at the innocent looking red-head, not knowing the future. Fool. And Xander would be panting on every word. Call Cordy the fool for not having seeing the 'what’ of Xander and Willow. Call Xander a fool when it comes out that Willow really liked girls.
Cordelia was so not in the mood for this trip down memory lane and the knowledge that was the outcome. She glanced at the slayer, scrutinizing the blonde's slopply ponytail. Then again maybe all she would have to hear about was a bad hair day crisis.
Cordelia nodded to their acknowledgments, going to the chair Xander pulled out or rather dragged from his seated position. “Hey. Are we talking yet, or are you still shooting barbs and arrows.”
Cordelia sighed, her inner bitch silenced, he was really cute, a dork, but sweet, well as much as he had been capable of being. Hindsight was so great and unwelcome right now. “Sorry, bad day, haven’t been feeling well.” She gave him a peck on the cheek. Her heart melted a little at the smile on the boy’s face. Oh Xander. Why couldn’t he have gotten over his slayer and witch obsessions? He was so cute. She smiled genuinely at the young man.
Xander stuttered something and almost fell out of the chair at the bright smile. Holy Jesus. He hadn’t seen that before, it was gorgeous.
“Klutz.” Cordelia laughed softly, straightening him up back in his chair, pulling at his collar. “Fashion dork.”
Xander blinked, as did the rest of the occupants of the room. Cordelia had insulted Xander. Check normal, the smile and tender tone, check uh uh, way odd.
“Um, Cordelia, you aren’t feeling well.” Willow quietly asked never quite sure how the brunette would react.
“Nothing, just …” Cordelia waved her hand in the air. “ I’m okay, thanks though.”
Willow gave a small smile in return at Cordy’s. That was weird. Xander had been complaining all day that Cordelia had been rude and insulting. And Willow knew for an almost fact that the young woman had ducked in the bathroom rather than talk to her and Buffy in the student lounge before lunch. But now… Cordelia was smiling and almost being nice. Willow shrugged, maybe Cordelia was really sick. Unsure, Willow settled back into her silent boyfriend’s lap.
Xander leaned into Cordelia taking advantage of her surprising pleasantness. “So tonight, the movies, or maybe the Bronze?”
Cordelia scrunched up her face. Okay, she didn’t hate Xander anymore, but that didn’t mean she wanted to necessarily spend quality alone time with her ex-boyfriend, but neither did she want to blast his eager smile.
“How about the Bronze, we all could go?” She asked Willow, Oz, and Buffy. She hid her cringe at her impulsive statement. If Buffy went that meant Angel would probably show up lurking in a corner somewhere. Cordelia’s eyes darted to the dark shadows of the library, searching for the vampire. It was about time for him to show up and blend into the woodwork.
Buffy wrinkled her brow. “I need too patrol and….make sure,” her very deceptive delicate shoulders slumped, “make sure that Angelus hasn’t…isn’t.” Her blue eyes saddened, as she was unable to finish.
“Buffy, it will all right. You…” Willow stuttered her voice encouraging and sad.
“Will be able to kill him….yeah. Me- slayer, Angelus-, evil ex-boyfriend vampire that wants to kill my friends, yeah.” She sadly repeated and then nodded with a forced smile. “How about I just meet you’ll there.”
“We’ll go with you, then we can go to the Bronze, right, Cordy. Cordy?” Xander glanced at his girlfriend’s silence.
Cordelia sat frozen, the blood drained from her face. She blinked as her stomach twirled and turned forcing it’s way too her throat. She jumped up and ran.
“What?” Xander stood.
“She looked sick. Cordelia was really sick, “ Willow nodded to Oz, finally satisfied at Cordy’s earlier nice behavior.
***
Cordelia inelegantly rested her sweating face on the cool porcelain of one of the many school’s toilets. Stupid. Stupid. She was tempted to pound her head into the coolness.
The woman took a deep breath, getting up. Cordelia went to the sink, thankful that classes were over. She could have a moment of peace between the bathroom walls. She splashed water on her face, while sucking in handfuls of water to get rid of the bile that was still tainting her mouth.
Stupid. Cordelia slid against the wall and clutched at her head, the tear flowing freely. It had to be Wolfram & Hart - they just tossed her in different manner to a different time where Angelus could kill her without Angel being anywhere near to save her.
Good god. She hadn’t forgotten but she hadn’t thought about it. She was 17 that meant Buffy was-their birthdays were close together. Buffy and Angel had sex on Buffy’s birthday, and wham what a birthday, getting groiny and releasing Angelus.
Angel didn’t go to hell until, well Damn’t, Cordelia wasn’t sure, all her high school years blurred together in her memory. But it was too long away Cordleia did know that. The vampire with a soul was out of her reach again. Cordelia had sworn that she wouldn’t violate the Star Trek’s Prime Directive- and beg Angel to help her, let him know his future. But, deep down, if she couldn’t have her Angel, she had counted on this Angel as a last resort if she couldn’t figure it out for herself. And now that was gone. He was gone, not only gone but the danger. If she lived long enough, she would see him return beautiful and ensouled. But would she live that long?
Cordelia gulped wiping at her face going back to the sink. She needed to think. What had Angel said? He remembered her, but not who she was. Just that she was a brunette that got away from Angelus in 1898. He had said a gorgeous beautiful spirited brunette. Cordelia wanted to cry again at memory. She and Angel had been tucked in each other’s arm, his new mark on her neck taking over Angelus’, he softly told her that he had remembered her and that he was so grateful for his love for Buffy, because if he hadn’t fallen in love with Buffy, then when Angelus appeared in Sunnydale, he would’ve known Cordelia from that past and taken her and destroyed both of their futures.
Cordelia took another deep breath. She remembered being irritated that when she first saw Angel, before she knew he was a vampire, his attention had been focused on Buffy. He had been so sexy, it only seemed right that he would be attracted to Queen C, the dating slayer, but now she was as grateful as Angel had been.
She chuckled at the exaggerated pouts she had given, years later, as Angel explained his relief. She had complained, ordered, and begged him to prove that it was her and only her that he loved then. Cordelia pulled down her turtleneck, gazing at the marks that proved Angels’ love and need and hers.
Cordy leaned up bracing her hands on the sink. All she had to do was avoid Angelus. He didn’t want her. Wolfram & Hart had fucked up. And Cordelia had to believe that Angel and her family knew something was wrong and would fix it, save her.
“Cordelia,” Buffy peeked into the door. She hadn’t really wanted to go after Cordelia. But Xander looked so worried. And Willow wouldn’t get out of her chair too comfortable on Oz’s lap and too uncomfortable with checking on Cordelia. So, it was left to Buffy.
Cordy splashed some more water on her face before turning to the slayer. “I guess I am sick. “ she quirked a smile. “Um, could you tell Xander that I’m sorry, but I don’t think I can do a Bronze night, tonight. I’m just going to go home.”
“Sure,” Buffy kind of liked a sick Cordelia. She wasn’t snipping down people’s throats or being a major stuck up bitch. “Um, I’ll walk you too your car, it’s dark. “ Buffy blinked. “Vampires,” not willing to name the one that was worrying her the most.
Cordelia nodded. If Angelus was out there his focus would be on Buffy and whenever Angelus and Buffy met in the past neither seemed to be able to kill each other, Angelus with his arrogance that another day would come and Buffy with her hesitation, until that last day and the sword thrust that sent Angel to hell.
Cordelia paused in the hallway. “Buffy, I’m truly sorry that you’ve experienced Angelus, he’s scary and an arrogant bastard and he’s Angel. I’m sorry.” Cordelia knowing now 100 percent the pain the blonde was going through.
“He’s not Angel.” Buffy glared.
“He is. He just doesn’t have the soul. But the other stuff is still there, the desire to kill, to feed, to possess…but.”
“You don’t know what you’re talking about. Angelus is not Angel.” Buffy glared, turning on her heel leaving Cordelia alone in the hall.
Cordelia stared after the angry in denial blonde. Her hand went back too her throat. Buffy was so wrong. She sighed. She hadn’t wanted to make the slayer mad. Cordelia shrugged. Well history wasn’t changed. Buffy still wasn’t going to be her best friend.
***
Cordelia unlocked her door in relief.
She scrunched her brow at the note on the refrigerator. It was from Marie reminding her that the maid was going to her sister’s for the week and that Cordy’s dinners were in the freezer. Marie also helpfully wrote that her parents called and were staying longer in the Caymans. Cordelia threw the note away.
Before she remembered feeling hurt that her parents had extended that trip, but now she was just glad. Dealing with her parents hadn’t been something she had been looking for to. Caymans. Cordelia snorted. That’s right, Daddy, hide that money so the IRS and your daughter won’t get any of it.
Cordelia stared at the full refrigerator, pulling out Marie’s evening dinner. It looked wonderful and so unappetizing. She slammed the door closed. She had work to do. First though, she needed to find some comfy clothes.
Once clad in her black stretchy pants, her over sized denim shirt and her hair in a high ponytail, Cordelia settled herself on the couch to research the materials she had gotten on her way home from the school. She studied the titles and plopped ‘Back to the Future’ into the VCR.
Cordelia fast-forwarded through the early parts. She didn’t have a time traveling DeLorean, so why bother. She watched Marty McFly's 1950's time trip- fast-forwarding through the ickyness of Marty’s mother hitting on him. Cordelia stalled the movie at the scene where Marty’s future dad finally got some balls and slugged Biff. Then, she fast-forwarded to the end.
Cordelia turned the TV off. Marty had changed future for the better. So, did that mean the Star Trek rule wasn’t always sacrosanct. Cordelia scrunched up her face, trying to remember better the sequences of the terrors of Angelus in this time period.
In school, she had overheard some of the male students saying how hot Jenny Calendar was. So, Cordelia could assume that the teacher was still alive. Then again it was the Hellmouth, maybe they were having wet dreams about a dead woman. Yet, Giles hadn’t seemed heartbroken and Buffy had been sad, but not wracked with guilt at her Watcher’s sorrow.
Cordelia bit her lip. Could she go to Ms. Calendar and beg her too get the soul spell and do it before Ms. Calendar or anyone else died. Would getting Angel’s soul back sooner rather than later change things for the worse. Cordelia couldn’t see how. Angel…Cordelia shook her head. Doubts and warnings flooded her mind. Jenny Calendar’s death, Giles’ torture, Angel’s side trip to hell, his return, his guilt, Buffy’s initial wariness towards him because all that he had done as Angelus were major factors in Angel's decision to leave Buffy and Sunnydale. Without them happening, would he still go to LA, would he still be a warrior for the Powers, would he have his chance at redemption? Christ. She was getting a headache. Her eyes widened as she recognized the signs. Cordelia barely got out a strangled shit out before her brain exploded in fire and the vision bombarded her every senses.
Cordelia crumpled on the couch as her hands clenched against her eyes, her teeth drawing blood on her lips to stop from screaming out. Cordelia rocked her trembling body as the pain and images passed through her mind.
Cordelia struggled to her feet, her weight leaning on the arm of the couch, vision gone, but the pain still remaining a sharp pounding that caused white lights to throb against the back of her eyes.
Cordelia willed her body to straighten. She knew this pain. She could handle it. Don’t think about the potion. It wasn’t there, just like Angel's strong arms weren’t there, holding her soothing the ache away.
She focused on making it up the stairs to her mother’s medicine cabinet. The woman had a pharmacy in there. Something there had to help Cordelia think and function.
Cordelia squinted pushing through the various prescriptions looking for anything with the word codeine in it. Finally, with a sigh, she found a bottle of high dosage painkillers, the red label warning ordering limited use. She took three and slumped against her mother’s bathroom vanity.
Cordelia took deep even breaths, calming the pounding letting the medication take effect. The throbbing diminished enough, making her confident to stand and think.
1998 Cordelia Chase did not have visions. If she told Buffy, then those two kids… Stupid kids. Who makes out in a graveyard in Sunnyhell, why don’t they just wear signs - ‘Free Dinner’? It wasn’t like they were the slayer and Angel sneaking smooches behind the gravestones. Two vampires those lovebirds could handle. But those kids.
Cordelia sighed she wasn’t suppose to have visions. If she saved the couple she would be changing history. But, Cordelia couldn’t believe that the Powers would send her a vision just too screw everything up more or for her too let the victims of her vision die.
Decision made, Cordelia went to her fathers closet pulling out a long jacket. She headed towards her room, slipping on her running shoes, and stuffing her father’s pockets with crosses and spritzers of holy water. Damn, why didn’t she have any stakes or a crossbow? Right, because 1998 Cordelia stayed on the sidelines and waited to be saved. Stupid girl. Cordelia kicked over her nightstand, breaking off each leg, concealing the impromptu weapons in the jacket and the waistband of her pants.
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