Title: Survival Instincts
Author: ANGCOR707
Posted: 08-31-2002
Rating: NC-17
Email:
Content:
Summary: My speculation (renewed) on what may happen next season or better yet an overview of the season throuh flashbacks.
Spoilers: Aroud Mid-4th season AtS.
Disclaimer: The characters in the Angelverse were created by Joss Whedon & David Greenwalt. No infringement is intended, no profit is made.
Distribution: Take it share the wealth that I clearly don't have.
Notes:
Feedback: Yes. I need it.Part 1
Cordelia was in the hospital. Faith was heading down to Sunnydale and everyone was wondering about the events that lead up to this moment. Everyone was wondering how everything went wrong. How Things got out of control how their family had been stripped apart one by one.
Fred remembered so clearly after the events. The night Angelus had escaped. That wasn’t the beginning of everything going wrong, but it sure didn’t make things better.
* * *
Everyone was in the lobby getting prepared to get Angelus resouled. Which wasn’t easy. They had ended up Tranquilizing him and chaining him to the bed. They had to prevent Connor from staking him twice and Cordelia. Well Cordelia hadn’t been the same since she had gotten back. So detached. She had put up a wall and had become incredibly cold and snarky. Not like when she had acted like a bitch, but close enough.
Angel hadn’t taken it well and things were strained between her and Gunn. So Fred just didn’t have a chance to check things out see them through. Deicide on a solution. She wish she had though.
Angelus was struggling against the binds. The tranquilizer not quite enough to slow him down. HE wasn’t saying anything just struggling. This scared Fred more than if he had said something. HE wasn’t one to stay quiet.
"Nici mort nici flinctei
Te invoc, spirit al trecerii
Reda trupului ce separo omul de animal
Cu ajutorul acestui magic glob de crystal." Fred began messing up the words a bit.
The orb of Thesula was perched up at the end of the bed, and Fred continued steadily as Angelus still tried to break free. Gunn was holding another stake just in case while Cordelia and Connor stood at the door.
“ Quod periditum est, in venietur.” Fred continued.
Crack! That’s when everything fell.
* * *
/ It’s not the fall that will kill you it’s the sudden stop/ Fred thought to herself. Looking at Cordelia through the glass of the door. She had asked to be alone after waking up. Said something about all of them surrounding her bed made her feel like she was close to death.
Weren’t they all?
Part 2
On that one night everything that could go wrong went wrong. Angel sat beside Cordelia’s bed. Having not entered the room until she was asleep. HE didn’t know how things had become this way. That night everything changed.
* * *
Craackk! The bedpost broke under the pressure of Angelus’s struggling. Gunn pushed Fred out of the way as he made a move. Angelus just shoved him out of the way, and made a quick dive for the orb.
“ Drop it!” Cordelia shouted pointing a crossbow at his heart.
He gave her a knowing smirk. “ You wouldn’t. You love him to much.” He chided. She faltered realizing her own mistake. He used that to his advantage. Shoving her back, and taking a dash for the window.
Crash! The glass broke and he was gone.
* * *
Angel looked up at the cup of coffee that was being offered by Gunn and took it. HE didn’t say anything barely even began to acknowledge the man’s existence. HE let himself get lost in his own thoughts.
Gunn looked at Cordelia and wondered how they couldn’t have seen what seemed so obvious now. When she had first gotten back she didn’t remember them she didn’t even remember that big bads existed. She didn’t want to accept it at first. When she had first started to remember things it had been harder than they expected. She still didn’t want to remember. Didn’t want to know that the world was tragic. Then things took what seemed to be a great turn. She had started what seemed like a road down destruction. She’d train and whenever she had a vision the victim’s pain would be her anger towards the demon. She wanted to destroy it.
Part 3
Angel could barely remember the memories of Angelus at least the ones he figured that were most important. Of course his mind was plagued with all the sexual ones and the torture. Most of the things she had said, and done, but not anything besides the sex from the past few days. He knew there was something there that could make him understand. He wish it would just come to him.
* * *
Gunn paced the hotel atrium. It had been a week since Angelus’s escaped and since then their ‘family’ had lost all the patriarchs. Angel was Angelus and was tormenting them and who knows what others. Wesley was. Well he didn’t know what Wesley was doing. He wish he did though it would comfort him to know he was safe. Cordelia had just taken up a different kind of mission. She wasn’t really fighting for either side, and that with everything that was going on. Scared Gunn the most.
When she had gotten her memory back she had said something about how her power or at least some of it purged the darkness and evil right out of a creature or being, but it couldn’t just go somewhere it had to go to another being. It went into her.
When Cordelia was out of distance. Off somewhere with Fred. Lorne had said something extremely chilling. Something about how he hoped that whatever darkness that was plaguing her he hoped would go away. Whatever was going on with her power it could corrupt. She felt her visions from all sides. The victim, the villain and the hero. A combination like that could push one to the surface. Mainly the villain their feelings the hunger they felt for the kill. Could effect how Cordelia would react towards the victim. HE actually hadn’t said all that, but he had made it cryptic and for once Angel cleared out cleanly, and without question.
Fred was looking up spells to un-invite Angel from the Hyperion most of them were temporary, but it kept them alive.
* * *
Wesley kept in the waiting room. Knowing that Angel didn’t really want him there, but wouldn’t keep him out. Everything had spiraled he could remember everything clearly. A little to clear for his own liking.
* * *
Wesley and Lilah entered her office at Wolfram& Hart. She sat some of her files on her desk and knocked into Wesley as she jumped back.
Wesley saw the reason for the act. Their sitting coolly in Lilah’s chair was Cordelia. Reading from a book as if this were her normal routine. “ Lilah you’re late. Your secretary said I could wait in here. Said you’d be here soon. That was an hour ago. I really don’t like to wait.”
Wesley saw something in Cordelia’s eyes. The same cold demeanor of her Queen C days. The only difference was that it was darker and not as easily breakable or it seemed so.
“ What the hell are you doing here?” Lilah snapped. Cordelia gave her grin that sent a chill up Wesley’s spine.
“ Is that the way you greet a friend?” Cordelia questioned.
“ We’re not friends.”
“ I figure you’ve tried to kill me and people I know enough times that I believe I should get some sort of respect or maybe even a gold watch for making it to retirement of your hit list.”
“ What do you want?” Lilah asked. She held her usual arms crossed stance.
“ I want to take a peak through Files and Records. Check some things out and get some information.”
Wesley stayed silent just watching the two. Interesting Lilah barely took the time to deal with who came unannounced. Either Cordelia had something to use against her or Lilah was just intrigued.
“ What makes you think I’ll let you do that” Lilah hissed.
“ You’re not going to let me. I’m going to force you, or maybe you want Wesley to know you had something to do with what got him estranged from his family.”
Lilah became tightlipped, and faltered for a mere second. “ Who’s says he’ll believe you?”
“ Come on Li you really don’t think Wesley is dumb enough to truly trust anymore. You made sure of that. You planted the seeds of doubt. So even if he doesn’t really believe me well he’ll have his doubts.” Cordelia responded.
Wesley looked at Lilah and knew immediately that whatever Cordelia was going to tell him would be true.
“ Fine I’ll take you down to file and records then you’ll leave.” Lilah said coolly still keeping the portico up.
Cordelia’s eyes flashed in question, but finally stood up. “ Good. Now I’m going to trust you to walk behind me. Don’t spoil it. I’m not a murderer and I’d hate to start with such an easy kill.” Cordelia said her tone not showing any sign of sarcasm. “ Oh and Lilah when I leave I’d hate for any accidents to happen. It’s always a shame when people accidentally shoot themselves in the head twice or stab them selves in the back. I don’t want one those happening.”
* * *
Wesley finished the cold and bitter cup of coffee. That’s how he felt. That’s all was inside.
* * *
Lilah was about to exit the office when Wesley grabbed her arm and shoved her against the wall.
“ What the hell was she talking about?” he asked darkly.
“ Nothing that concerns you.” Lilah responded. She had expected everything besides what she got. He laughed cruelly.
“ Who’s name do you scream out at night?” he asked his eyes once again dark.
“ Yours.”
“ And what’s my name.”
“ Wesley I don’t know what kind of sick joke this is, but I suggest,” she was stopped as he shoved her up harder against the wall.
“ Wesley. That is my name. What does she know that involves me. That you are the only other bearer of this knowledge. This knowledge you want to keep secret.” After a few seconds Lilah didn’t answer. HE let her go slowly, and grimaced. “ Don’t think I’m your boy toy or your bitch. If I want out I’ll leave. SO whatever she knows better be small. This rite of passage you’re giving her, better be out of the kindness of your cold heart. Because if it isn’t. I won’t mind starting out as Cordelia put it ‘With such an easy kill’” HE was out of the office before she could retort not that she had one, but she could have. She straightened her suit out. This was to much of a turn on this early in the morning.
“ Lilah.” She heard Cordelia callout.
Damn it. I hate being backed into a corner. I refuse to let it happen again.
* * *
He didn’t know what Cordelia did with that information, but Angel probably did. He found out later of course, but most of it went on between Angel and Cordelia.
Angel was asleep when Cordelia woke up. Luckily someone had closed the blinds tightly, and the sun hadn’t scorched him. She pulled herself slowly up in bed and grimaced in pain. She wished things could have been different, but of course their whole family was Jossed by the powers that be. It could have been so easy, but their were loopholes. There are always loopholes.
* * *
Cordelia climbed through the window and crept towards Angelus’s bedroom. All she had to do was et the orb and get out. Of course she was drawn to the bathroom. Not because she wanted to see Angelus, not that she didn’t, but her feet just led her there.
She opened the door and was greeted ny the warmth of steam. He must have sensed her because though he didn’t turn off the water he turned around and Cordelia wouldn’t be surprised if her were wearing that grin of his. He slid the door open and grabbed a towel before she saw anything wrapping it lazily from his hips.
“ What do you want?” he asked. She asked herself why did he leave the water on if he had a towel on, but looked past it.
“ Not so much something I want as it is something a friend needs.” She replied.
He gave her a soft smirk almost as if considering her motives. He let his towel drop and reviled in the quickening of her heartbeat and the slight hint of arousal. He watched as her eyes looked down slowly taking all of him in. She licked her lips slowly and looked back up.
“ Nice,” she said slowly as a smile played on her lips. “but that’s not what I was looking for.”
“ That’s what you say.” He replied. “Can you hand me a towel?” he said after a few seconds.
She gave him a quizzical look as if questioning his motives. She grabbed a towel and held it up for him. Before she knew it he had pulled her in fast and hard and she smack against the back of the shower.
“ Now tell me again this isn’t what you want.”
Part 4
Angelus was staring at her like she was a glass of wine to be looked at shifted before the first taste. I can't believe I like this. Damn it this outfit is new. Cordelia thought. She wished he'd do whatever he planed already. She already knew she'd let him, or at least take part in it.
He was hovering and he knew it. Not to be gentle. No not at all, he was by here ear now taking unnecessary breaths and letting them fall to her neck like cool feathers. He didn't quite lick, but he didn't bite either. Before she could lie to herself that she'd actually try and stop anything he had taken off her shirt. When did he do that? Now just because she was letting this happen didn't mean she was going to be a statue. She shoved him back and he hit the glass of the shower door hard. He looked at her heartily as if he had hoped this would happen. His golden eyes were already taking her half naked form in. He advanced on her yet again and proceeded to shed her of the rest of her clothes depositing them on the bathroom floor.
Her arousal was nearly tangible on his tongue. He wanted nothing more than to take her, but it wasn't going to be that easy. He shifted back into his human façade and started to taste the flesh of her neck. His body not nearly cold enough for the effect he wanted, but it worked. Her body arched slightly into his touch. He smiled softly against her neck and pushed her back and used one hand to put her hands above her head.
She cried out as Angelus thrust one finger roughly inside her warmth. She wanted to touch him. Needed the contact with his skin his body, but held her hands in a vice like grip. He was thrusting his finger into her slowly. It was so rhythmic. All she wanted was to make it feel harder or anything just not the slow torture he was putting her through. He had let his game face come on and was teasing her collarbone with his fangs.
He knew she was about to climax. Her walls were contracting around his fingers and the heat of her was burning him slowly. He pulled his fingers out of her and heard her whimpered cry.
" Tell me again you don't want me." He said exiting the shower. He was wrapped in a towel and out of the bathroom before Cordelia opened her eyes.
" I don't." she breathed heavily.
* * *
Cordelia was watching the TV in her room and didn't notice that Angel had woken up or better yet didn't care to. HE watched as she stared blankly at the screen, which was playing some TV show or whatnot. HE had dreamt of that first real encounter. He wished now that he hadn't gone there that he hadn't had to go that far with it. Albeit it was Angelus, but that was apart of him and he had taken it that far. HE had challenged her. Tested her will and she tested right back.
* * *
He knew he sensed him at the door and knew he probably wanted nothing more than to kill him, but probably wouldn't since Cordelia was awake and it was hospital in which he could easily hide him in the morgue. Really shouldn' t think thoughts like that, Wesley could get you killed faster. Cordelia shifted in her bed.
" Hey, Wes." She said silently. Her voice was full of sincerity and love and most of all concern.
It hadn't been like that just the previous week. It felt better than still having to deal with Angelus who luckily hadn't been out for more than month or so. Yet his mind held nothing of Angelus, just the week before when Cordelia had come to him and things seemed to start to get better for them anyway. It almost got worse though.
Part 5
Wesley tried to shut the door as soon as he saw Cordelia, but she walked in anyway.
" Times like these i wish I could uninvite people i don't want to see." Wesley said bitterly.
"That's harsh. I came here to talk. To fix whatever went wrong." she said sharply.
Wesley gave her a long look and went over to get her a drink. At that point the plain fact that she wanted to talk sparked a bit of hope in him. " So why me?"
She looked up from the glass she'd been staring into like it held all the worlds' riches. / She was definitely the glass is half full type. / " I needed someone familiar. I know we're not really the best of friends right now and it's partly my fault. I came here once saw Lilah was leaving decided not to stay. But I feel at peace weird eh?"
Wesley was comforted and oddly surprised at the revelation. " You came here after Lilah. How did you know about that?"
"Same way you knew about Angelus." She said the name with a conviction Wesley respected. Whenever during the rare time that Buffy had said the name she always had a hope in her voice resonance that said maybe Angel was still there. Cordelia didn't think it. She knew they were two halves of one whole, but she also knew which one she loved which one to defend herself against. She was stronger than she let on in appearance, but that added to the charm. She wouldn't sleep with Angelus without reason and Wesley knew that he wouldn't get it out of her, but he would try.
* * *
Wesley never got that chance. To find out what was going on, but he knew eventually he'd find out.
Cordelia, attempted to wave him, but decided to just gesture a lot with her hands." He sat down on the other chair besides her bed.
" How are you?" he questioned.
" Feel like I just ran myself into a truck. In other words pretty fucked up." She responded. Angel didn't say a word just watched them. Every time he'd look at Cordelia Wesley swore he was broken up inside.
* * *
Angelus entered his bedroom slowly. He was angry. That damn Gunn had had the nerve to attack him. Believing that he could subdue him, it hadn't worked and yet he had escaped with his life.
He immediately noticed the blood red rose on his pillow. Shining brightly against the black satin. His senses flared as her scent summoned him. She thinks she can play me? It was more of a question to himself them a simple mockery of the thought. It had been two days since the shower incident and he had suspected she had just realized she couldn't win though he had been prepared for her next move.
Before she could even touch him from behind he had her pushed against the door. " Didn't really think it'd be that easy did you?" he said a deep drawl of pity in his voice as if her insolence were sad enough. Her eyes never faltered never gave way to any emotion. She smirked at the anger that was evident.
"You're going to scream whether for pleasure or pain I don't care. Preferrably both. You wouldn't have comeback if you didn't want this." She let her eyes close for a second as his hand rubbed over her heat through her jeans. " You want this this darkness that I offer. I made you that way. Hell, he made you that way. Took you out of the sun and brought you to him, but never made the move. I'm not making that same mistake."
He removed his hands and grabbed her harshly by the waist. Thrusting against her heat his length bumped against her upper thigh. " See what you do to me?" HE questioned. HE looked down at her. The only emotion he saw was pain not the bad kind either. HE then started his attack on her lips. Her hands were everywhere at once until he grabbed them and put her in almost the exact position as in the shower. Her legs didn't oblige as they wrapped around his waist. She didn't give up on the struggle for freedom of her hands, but he wasn't going to give her that option. Her arousal became mixed with her anger and frustration. He was rubbing against her groin letting the friction get to her. Almost tempted to end the game to make her come, but not yet. Not after what she did to him when he had the soul. All those touches and smiles. She did it on purpose and she knew what it cuased. Him satted in the shower letting the hot water consume his body just so soulboy could almost feel what it was like with her. Well Angel was gone and he was getting there first.
TBC