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I've always been partial to, "I'll try being nicer, if you'll try being smarter," or "Tact is just not saying true stuff. I'll pass."
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"If the burden seems to much to bear: Remember: The end will justify the pain it took to get us there."--Relient K, Let It All Out
"Ahem. Ladies is pimps too. Go'on brush your shoulders off."
I survive on the breath you are finished with...
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